My tutor and I met after he returned to China. I was less than twelve at that time. At that time, I was still a naive child, but my tutor never treated me like a child and always asked me to regulate my behavior when I was an adult. At that time, I was too young to understand the behavior requirements of my tutor. I even secretly had a grievance against him. At that time, there was the most dissatisfaction. Don't talk to him, like him quarreling, and completely make a child's mind to make his own dissatisfied behavior. Now that I think about it, it's quite ridiculous.
Time is always like a blink of an eye, too late to enjoy. It has pushed you to another stage. With the growth of my age, I began to step into high school life, and my contact with my tutor was also decreasing. Sometimes, when I am alone in a quiet night, I will miss my tutor's teaching quietly, but I know I just miss him, but I can't talk to him face to face. Every time I think about it, I always feel "inexplicable" in my heart.
Every time I seize the opportunity, I don't want to leave early. I really hope to have such an opportunity to have a good chat with him all night, but it's just a beautiful fantasy and wish. In fact, sometimes for nothing else, just want to know him better, just want to go deep into his heart and share his inner pressure and things he doesn't want to say.
I clearly remember that night, the coincidence of time or what caused us to have a talk under the stars all over the sky. On that day, we all expressed some of our views, especially what I have been trying to say to him for so many years. However, he didn't give me too many unexpected surprises. He just said, "Your words touched me very much. It is enough to have you as my confidant." I just laughed. There are not many words to seriously evaluate what he said to me. However, I may never have thought that this might be the last conversation between us and him working here, and there have been conversations since then, but he never returned to this place.
After his own problems, our contact was basically in a state of interruption. When I learned his reason, I even hated him a little. The image he has always established in my heart and the values he has established for me have been destroyed by his weapons. I am dissatisfied with my own unwillingness and his behavior. At the beginning, I was extremely dissatisfied except resentment.
By chance, we met again. I asked him this sentence, and I said, "Are all principles unable to withstand the destruction of reality?" He finally understood that I didn't even believe him at first, but he told me that you should never give up what you should insist on. Life is a way out and a taste.
Life is the way out and the taste. I don't think I can understand this truth at this stage, but it must be that he can smell hardships, sadness and helplessness after a long period of boiling. This kind of talk is full of years of elutriation and inner struggle and distress, with the breath of "blood".
My tutor and I have lived like water, so ordinary but without losing the brilliance of human nature. Although we don't communicate much, I know what he thinks.
I always want to see your smile and listen to your voice. My mentor, can you hear your inner call from a distance?
A hedge between keeps friendship green.