At this time, it is snowing lightly outside. This is the 25th day after Xiao Juan gave birth, and she hasn't even come out next month.
"Let her go, let her go!" Mother-in-law also yelled.
"Yes, I'm not used to her." Xiao Juan's husband flew into a rage and slammed the door.
In this way, just 25 days after delivery, Xiao Juan and her mother-in-law changed from sympathizing with their mother and daughter to enemies.
Xiao Juan said frankly that all these changes were because her mother-in-law did three extraordinary things after giving birth, which made her unbearable.
0 1, if you don't eat, you will not produce milk. Too selfish.
Xiao Juan was taken care of by her mother-in-law during the whole pregnancy, because Xiao Juan was pregnant at the age of 30 and was pregnant with twins, and there were signs of miscarriage at an early stage. Mother-in-law took special care of Xiao Juan, which can be described as meticulous and dedicated.
"Really, since the childhood, even my mother didn't hurt me like this. My mother-in-law's main task every day is to cook me three meals a day, seven days a week, chicken, duck, fish and seasonal fruits. " Xiao Juan was very grateful to her mother-in-law when she mentioned the whole pregnancy process.
In order to ensure the healthy growth of their two children, Xiao Juan's weight has also soared from 1 10 kg before pregnancy to 170 kg before pregnancy.
Xiao Juan thought about hiring a new moon to wait on her, but her mother-in-law was distressed by her 1000 monthly salary, and both her mother-in-law and Xiao Juan felt that her mother-in-law were in similar situation, so it was no problem for her mother-in-law to take care of her, so Xiao Juan gave up the plan of taking a new moon.
But at the first meal after delivery, Xiao Juan regretted it.
At that time, her mother-in-law gave Xiao Juan red dates, millet and wheat porridge. When Xiao Juan took the first sip, he saw a few white bugs floating in the porridge. He suddenly felt sick and blurted out, "Mom, there are bugs in this porridge. I can't drink it."
"There are bugs? No, this rice and jujube are all newly bought. " Mother-in-law looks innocent.
Xiao Juan put the porridge aside and asked her husband to go to the hospital cafeteria to buy porridge for himself, but her mother-in-law stopped her husband: "What's wrong with the bug? You can also drink it without affecting nutrition. The porridge in the canteen, half a bowl of soup and a few grains of rice can match the nutrition of the porridge I cooked? " He said, and handed the porridge to Xiao Juan.
Xiao Juan looked at her husband, who smiled awkwardly: "You should add protein, Mi Chong is a high-grade protein!"
Xiao Juan angrily put the porridge on the table, refused to drink it, and covered her head with a quilt to resist.
Mother-in-law added: "If you don't eat, you won't produce milk. If you are a mother, can you still be so selfish? " What can I do if I starve my child to death? "
As she spoke, her mother-in-law wiped her tears, which provoked Xiao Juan's husband to comfort her mother, saying that Xiao Juan was not sensible and told her not to be as learned as Xiao Juan.
After Xiao Juan came home from the hospital, her mother-in-law took care of her for a month. Her mother-in-law cooks Xiao Juan pig's trotters soup and crucian carp soup every day without putting a drop of salt. Pig's trotter soup is always half a bowl of oil and half a bowl of soup, and crucian carp soup is even more fishy. Xiao Juan always takes a sip and spits three times, which is really hard to swallow.
But her mother-in-law always forces Xiao Juan to drink, because she doesn't drink milk, which is selfish.
Don't drink the first meal, the second meal is it, the second meal is not eaten, and the third meal is it.
Worst of all, on the eighth day after delivery, Xiao Juan didn't take a bite of the soup made by her mother-in-law from morning till night, and her mother-in-law didn't cook anything else for Xiao Juan.
In the evening, when Xiao Juan's husband came home from work, her mother-in-law cried while wiping her tears: "I made soup for her with kindness, but she threw her face or lost her temper, but she insisted on eating it. If she doesn't eat, her two children will starve to death. This is selfish. "
So the husband heated it three times a day without adding a drop of salt, and the pig's trotter soup with a thick layer of lard came to Xiao Juan's bed again.
02, I pay so much, I will take the child's name.
The second contradiction between Xiao Juan and her mother-in-law is about naming the children.
Xiao Juan graduated from the Chinese Department of a key university, so he naturally has his own ideas on the important issue of naming children.
Before giving birth, I made an arrangement with my husband to separate his surname "Jia" The children's nicknames are "Xixi" and "Beibei".
But when the mother-in-law heard it, she immediately objected: "The child's name doesn't have to be named after her mother, which makes people laugh."
Although Xiao Juan explained that it was just a nickname for children, her mother-in-law strongly opposed it. For the sake of harmony and the careful care of her prenatal mother-in-law, Xiao Juan gave in and gave her the right to take a nickname.
After giving birth, when it was time to name the child, Xiao Juan combined the child's birth date, reading dictionaries, ancient books and other comprehensive factors to give the child more than a dozen pairs of names, all of which had good meanings and personalities.
But all the names were rejected by her mother-in-law on the grounds of "ugly", "bad" and "violating the names of her elders"
After that, Xiao Juan took several pairs of names, and her mother-in-law didn't even look at them. She just said no: "The names you took are not good at all."
Then my mother-in-law took out her name.
But my mother-in-law took this name, which was not only vulgar, but also easy to repeat, and also violated Grandpa Xiao Juan's taboo.
However, her mother-in-law insisted on using the name she got, saying that Daxian gave it to her at her own expense for several hundred dollars. These two names are particularly good for children's future, and they can bless children's smooth life and become big officials in the future.
Xiao Juan in distress situation, let her husband reason.
The husband said, "The name is just a person's title. How can you compete with the old man in such a trivial matter? " ? My mother didn't even have the right to choose a name after what she did to you? "
Xiao Juan is even more aggrieved: "How hard your mother works, pregnant in October, giving up her body after giving birth, covered with stretch marks, leaving a lifelong scar, can it be harder than me?" ? The child belongs to his mother, not his grandmother. "
Later, her mother-in-law and her husband kept Xiao Juan in the dark and registered the child under the name given by her mother-in-law, which made Xiao Juan very angry and made a cold war with her husband.
But her husband and mother-in-law don't care Often, Xiao Juan is angry, tearful and busy with her two children in the room, while her husband and mother-in-law watch TV and chat in the living room, putting on scenes of filial piety.
Don't expect men to look after children.
What makes Xiao Juan even more chilling is that her mother-in-law is so eccentric that she won't let Xiao Juan's husband do anything.
Xiao Juan and her mother-in-law have been taking care of two children since Xiao Juan came home from the hospital.
The two children don't sleep or wake up at the same time, so they need to be taken care of when eating and drinking Lazar. Mother-in-law can sleep well at night without help, while Xiao Juan, as a maternity, stays in bed for almost no more than 10 minutes.
Xiao Juan seems to have been changing diapers, making milk powder, feeding and taking a bath ... Even at night, he has to get up at least four times to change diapers and feed his children.
This made Xiao Juan exhausted, unbearable and grumpy.
One morning, holding her husband's briefcase, she cried and begged him to take time off to take care of herself and her children for two days.
The husband was comforting Xiao Juan when her mother-in-law came over and said angrily, "Isn't it enough for me to serve you alone? There is nothing he can do. What can he do at home? " Said, and pushed Xiao Juan's husband out of the house.
One night, Xiao Juan was tired and had a backache, so she told her husband to get up and feed the baby with milk powder. When her husband was motionless, Xiao Juan began to make noise and her mother-in-law was awakened. She began to teach Xiao Juan a lesson: "He has worked all day and is tired enough. You still torment him at night. How can he make milk powder? " Say that finish, Xiao Juan's husband was pushed into the study, bedding was moved to the study, and her mother-in-law moved to Xiao Juan's room, which made Xiao Juan very angry.
One day, Xiao Juan was nursing her baby and asked her husband to pour himself a cup of brown sugar water. Her husband was just about to move, and her mother-in-law said, "It's good for your health to exercise more after delivery. You can get up and do it yourself in the future. "
On the 25th day after delivery, one of the two children began to have a fever. Xiao Juan asked her husband to hold the baby, pack up his things and go to the hospital at once.
But her mother-in-law immediately said, "Where can he hold a child? You'd better hold it. "
So Xiao Juan asked her husband to clean up, and her mother-in-law said, "Where does he know what to clean up? You'd better tidy up. "
Xiao Juan asked her husband to call another car, and her mother-in-law spoke again: "It's so cold, if he goes out alone, wouldn't it freeze to death!"
"Does that mean I have to hold the baby, pack my things, then go out and call a car, and then invite your son downstairs?" Xiao Juan answered her mother-in-law rudely.
"You are simply unreasonable, making much ado about nothing." My mother-in-law shouted at Xiao Juan.
So Xiao Juan, in general, said at the beginning of the article, picked up the child and took a taxi to the hospital.
"25 days after delivery, I feel that my mother-in-law took care of me before delivery, all for me to give her grandchildren; I will give birth to milk after giving birth, and I will be a sinner if I don't give birth; Taking care of the children is my own business. It is not my husband who takes care of me. I have to take care of my husband. Is there any justice? " Xiao Juan complained.
04. Write it at the end.
In fact, like Xiao Juan, it is not a case that her mother-in-law got into trouble because of confinement.
Are these contradictions really irreconcilable? I don't think so!
First of all, as a mother-in-law, we should not only consider grandchildren, but also consider the feelings of our daughter-in-law.
Postpartum women are often affected by hormonal changes in the body, and they are sensitive, irritable and tearful, which is uncontrollable.
When the mother-in-law puts the burden of producing milk, taking care of the baby, being reasonable and obedient on her, and makes her eat what she doesn't want to eat and do what she doesn't want to do, her legitimate demands are not met, and the hardships of childbirth are not recognized, which is very likely to cause postpartum depression.
At this time, we should put the daughter-in-law first, be more patient, care more and communicate more, so that the daughter-in-law can have a satisfactory month and lay a better foundation for the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law
Secondly, as a husband, he should be the lubricant between mother and wife. He must do everything himself, never learn, ask if he doesn't understand, appease his daughter-in-law if she is wronged, and persuade her if she nags. The last thing he should do is to generalize. At this time, it will hurt the wife's heart and become a wound that is difficult to heal in the relationship between husband and wife.
Thirdly, as a parturient, we should know the dilemma of childbirth and the common sense of postpartum depression in advance, and think positively of everything. After all, a family always has a good starting point. Don't feel sorry for yourself, your family is your enemy, and you will suffer both physically and mentally.
These words are addressed to Xiao Juan and her mother-in-law, as well as to her daughter-in-law who is about to give birth and her mother-in-law who is about to wait on her daughter-in-law.
I am willing to write to encourage my readers.
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