Obviously, there is a lot of work to be done, but I can't resist the temptation to play games. On the one hand, I am happy to play games, on the other hand, I am afraid of being flustered by the leaders.

Obviously, I am eating delicious food, but I am quickly calculating calories in my mind, thinking that I can't eat too much to lose weight, but it will greatly reduce the food;

Obviously, I am watching a drama that has been planting grass for a long time, but at the same time I tell myself to read more books to improve myself. At this time, the interesting plot has not attracted me. ...

Playing games, eating delicious food and going to the theatre should be pleasant behaviors, but what I feel is "fake cool".

? Until one day when I was brushing a video, I saw this sentence: "Cool is the disappearance of internal conflicts."

Wake up the dreamer in one word.

? (Original video link: winter vacation teaches you how to fly without playing mobile phones)

I suddenly realized that when our actions conflict with our inner thoughts, or many ideas in our minds conflict, we are doomed to never feel true happiness.

In the original example of the article, my behavior is "eating high-calorie food", but my inner thought is "I want to control my diet during this time to achieve the purpose of losing weight". Obviously, my behavior and thoughts are contradictory, which makes me unable to enjoy food.

I want self-discipline and self-indulgence. These two ideas are in conflict with each other, so no matter what I do, I can't be satisfied. The end result is often simply ruined and nothing is done.

So, how should we get real happiness? Knowing the cause of the problem, it seems that it is not so difficult to solve it.

One thing is to keep your behavior consistent with your thoughts. If you want to lose weight, try to avoid high-calorie foods and choose a delicious and healthy fat-reducing meal; If you have to work, you should finish the work first, then enjoy and relax ... Of course, the reason is clear, and new problems will appear in practice, such as: you want to lose weight and eat delicious food. Which is the real "want"? However, this article will not discuss this topic for the time being, and you can write a separate article when you have the opportunity (digging a hole) in the future.

On the other hand, when multiple ideas conflict, we can rank the importance of the ideas and obey the most important one first. In fact, this is the same as the principle of ranking the importance of goals. Do "important and urgent things" first. One thing to be reminded is that "important things" are related to yourself, not to others. What is really important to you? This may be something that many people can't figure out all their lives.

In fact, children's happiness is the purest. Most of their behaviors and ideas are not very contradictory. If they want ice cream, they really want it. After a few bites, they will give it back to the adults. As soon as they have an idea, they will express it and won't stay in their minds for long.

Although we can't be as reckless as children when we grow up, and although we are bound by too many rules, the development of reality can't be controlled, we still have to work hard to eliminate our inner contradictions, at least towards real happiness.

Finally, I recommend several books about happiness and happiness, including biology, philosophy, iconology and so on. When you can't solve your own problems, seek answers from the wisdom of others.