Text/All the way to bloom
When my hands can no longer hold those slender wooden chopsticks, I have to admit that I am old. I don't know when the broad back has been bent in the wind and sand of the years. I can't make a wooden horse for you any more, in exchange for your laughter like an autumn spring.
You have finally grown up, with the keenness and stubbornness of an adult. You are no longer afraid of my severity, because you know, no matter what, I can't count all your faults as I did then. At the moment, we seem to have changed places. You often complain about my nagging and dullness and leave me alone at home, which reminds me of you many years ago.
You may have forgotten how naughty you were when you were a child. In order to repair your inferiority complex, I often lock you in the house and let you cry and coquetry in front of the cold iron window.
I often watch TV while eating. At this time, you always calm your face and guide me slowly. You told me a lot about staying healthy. You said that watching TV while eating affects digestion and is not good for the stomach. I know you are very kind to me, but unfortunately, I have never corrected it.
Do you know that?/You know what? Do you know that?/You know what? How ugly I am eating at the moment, most of the time, even I can't stand it. The rice that is clearly chewed in your mouth will definitely fall into the bowl; Clearly clenched chopsticks, but kept shaking for no reason. I really don't want you to see me now.
Many times, I want to tell you, don't interrupt me, let me go on, even if it is trivial nagging and endless repetition. Do you know that?/You know what? Do you know that?/You know what? This is not a new symptom. When you were young, I had to comfort you over and over again and read the same story over and over again until you fell asleep.
When I don't want to take a shower, don't humiliate me, let alone scold me. Do you remember? How many reasons and lies have I made up to coax you into taking a bath?
When you smile at the computer and I don't know why, don't laugh at me. Be patient, hold my hand and give me some time. How many things have I taught you! Teach you to eat, teach you to wear, and teach you how to face the short life and all possible setbacks in the future.
After returning home, I often find excuses to chat with you, but I often forget what I want to say, or suddenly lose my voice during the conversation. At this time, you always turn around and leave in a hurry, and tell me that I will tell you next time I think about it. I hope you can simply comfort me, don't worry, let me think about how to continue. If I can't do anything all the time, don't be nervous and stay with me. What matters to me is not talking, but being with you.
When my legs fail and I feel depressed, come up and give me a hand and encourage me, just like I helped you take the first step in your life.
Occasionally I will tell you that I really don't want to live, so don't be angry, because one day you will understand that no matter how old a father is, he doesn't want to be a burden to his children.
Try to understand me and forget the mistakes I made. No matter how many things I have done to make you sad, I will, as always, leave you the best.
When I get up the courage to get close to you, don't be sentimental, don't be angry, be patient, help me finish the last leg, and I will try my best to love you, my child. (grateful)