Yard? What is this?
Thinking of the lecture the day before yesterday, the journey is a bit long. On the way back, I passed several courtyards, which is Chai Fei's real fish scale tile house. Reminds me of those houses on the way back to Tibet from Nepal. It is also such a dusk, and it is also such a sunset.
At that time, the lazy light of the sunset suddenly isolated these courtyards from reality. A little lonely.
Since I was a child, I yearned for the life of planting mulberry and hemp, men farming and women weaving. The thoughts that have been suppressed in my mind for many years seem to be awakened by something, and my eyes can't help burning.
What depresses us in this world is often that people who are tired of us are fickle, and those who love us are difficult to be consistent.
If I can be with the love of my life and live in such a yard with him. There are vines and weeds. Even if there are mosquitoes, you can use wormwood to disperse them. Even if the grass is sparse, there are good cooks of soup. Cutting candles, gambling on books and splashing tea are all the same to me, whether it's under vines or between plum cranes, whether it's in a mansion or a hut. As long as the well water is as cool as his poems, the clouds are as soft as his eyes, and the wind is as reassuring as his breathing. ...
Such a courtyard is an obsession and a dream, which is often shattered by phone calls, text messages, bills and traffic.
Suddenly, the driver said, "Here we are."
Suddenly I found it was dark and the sunset had ended. This world, or that world.
In addition, I found myself forgetting Jiang Yan's house and copying it myself.
My classmates saw in the message in my circle of friends that I was going to attend a lecture on Teacher's Day, and I was not at home during the day. Thus, Teacher's Day has become a "series".
Qingyan graduated in 2009. It is a coincidence that she came to work in Normal University this year. For more than ten years, her name has repeatedly appeared on my social media, which is very impressive. So, when she showed up with flowers today, I naturally hugged her.
Ten years has become a moment of hugs.
During the chat, she mentioned one thing: "I clearly remember that my classmates and I met you once." The girl is wearing a necklace, and the pendant is upside down. You naturally turned the pendant around for her. I thought at that time, this teacher is a good friend! "
I don't remember such a small thing at all. But after all these years, she sounds just like yesterday.
I met a former student when I went to Zhengzhou to attend a class during the holiday. She mentioned that when we were chatting in a circle of friends, I "put my hand on her shoulder", which made her feel back to her student days and felt very warm.
When I was in a circle of friends on Teacher's Day that day, a student who graduated for ten years replied to me. "
A mother in the group said that the children quietly put away the prepared gifts when they saw that the garbage room at school was full of flowers and various gifts today. . . I was sad for a long time, for my children, for my parents and for the world. I'm glad to see this passage from Sister Anna, which brings me some comfort. "
I also remember that once the college leader asked me for an award certificate. I can't find it in my rummage.
The leader is puzzled: "why can't I find the award certificate?" You didn't put it away? "
I said, "Yes, my papers are often lost ..."
The leader joked, "You put away all the letters the students gave you!"
I blurted out, "Of course! They are all well placed in the box! "
Students often say that my existence or words give them a lot of comfort and give them bright colors in life. But I think there has never been love or hate for no reason in this world.
In the activity of "reading classics", I once said, "What's so expensive? Brand clothes and cosmetics? Or gold, diamonds, jadeite? I think what is really expensive now is often not because of materials and brands, but because of time.
I am willing to spend time on it, that is to say, I am willing to allocate a part of my life to you. What an affectionate gift this is!
..... This era is an era of rapid information arrival, and whoosh-you can know that I love you. However, how much we long for that plum blossom, fish is slow. "
Just like WQ ordered a cake one day late to give me a teacher's day greeting. When she first entered the workplace, she suffered all kinds of pains. Every afternoon from 5: 30 to 1 1: 00, but I still took time to talk to me for nearly 40 minutes before class in the evening. . .
These people who love me, so long and delicate love me, remember all the details about me in the way of relatives and lovers. They gave me past time, present time and future. I am willing to enter their lives and continue to exist. How can I not love them?
I often tell others that for me, teaching is like falling in love.
Thank you for always pampering me and loving me like a cardamom girl. Thank you for remembering me and never giving up.
Love is an echo, and we echo each other.
Several stories about Teachers' Day:
Dear Li Xia sent flowers yesterday and called me "teacher". In fact, we are friends, comrades-in-arms and bosom friends. But she is really the kind of person who is good at learning from others. Although her teaching is unique and has special styles and ideas, she still values the little inspiration given to her by others. Just like Teacher Yu Yi said: Be a lifelong teacher, learn to be a lifelong teacher. Li Xia is such a typical example. I admire her very much, standing in position C with her flowers in my arms.
Several students who have become teachers mentioned my influence on them, and I once again realized that "the best expectation in education is to be you when I grow up."
In the process of teaching, I became lifelong friends with some students. Needless to say, I can also observe my own small emotions through time and space, such as Wen Ping. Sometimes I become friends with students' families. They listened to my class together, watched my development and greeted me on every unforgettable day. . .
I also found a student who has been with me for nine years. . . I don't run QQ for many days, so I have to persevere in order to master my movements and keep me in mind. . .
Mango is quite sensitive to Teacher's Day. Make me a card as soon as you come back from kindergarten. Except for the card window wood, all the text design and painting were done by herself. She said that her mother is a teacher and a university teacher, and she should give two cards.
I think there are many cold feelings in this world, but there are also many timeless feelings.
In the process of teaching, I have experienced all these. But I believe that we are all growing, remembering and developing, and those timeless stories have withstood all the cold.
-greetings that are not answered one by one. All the love is in my heart. Thank you.
Many times in bgm, I heard a boy singing in a hoarse voice, "He really likes you, like the wind has gone eight thousand miles. He really likes you and takes a bath in the Antarctic ... "I don't know the name of this song, but I like the boy's low whisper. Today, I brushed this bgm again, and after a curious search, I realized that this is Lewless's A Floating Life.
In fact, I have heard of Lewless's children and some of them, and I like them very much. I just didn't know that Six Chapters of a Floating Life and these songs were written by him.
Bgm usually takes it directly from "He really likes you". It turns out that Six Chapters of a Floating Life has two paragraphs, beginning with "nobody" and ending with "someone". I haven't had a song for a long time, but Six Chapters of a Floating Life made me cry.
Comments on Netease Music Six Chapters of a Floating Life 187747, 9388 pages.
Looking at180,000+comments, I can't bear it-every comment is a floating story. Behind these stories are countless entanglements, memories, pain, relief and helplessness.
The maximum comment text is only 140 words. 140 words, maybe 1400 days of memory, maybe 140 times of "I love you", maybe 14 times of quarreling ... The story and heart are particularly cramped. The wording of the comments was very restrained. But each one is hard to read. . .
Finally, I couldn't help crying.
No matter how difficult it is, at this moment, 180000+ stories gathered under Six Chapters of a Floating Life are quietly coming between the lines. No more tears, no more crying, but their silence made me feel a sudden sound-this is "floating life"!
Floating life means that all the fierceness will fade, all the pain will scab, all the memories will be forgotten, and all the family ties are the past. The songs that are specially sung to you, the words that are said to you, and the warm hugs and kisses will all solidify at some time. You can look back, see and think, but you can't touch it again.
Floating life is so unreal and real. All your fantasies for the rest of your life were once real.
And the only thing you can continue to be true is that you will still have a yearning for it, a tear, a paragraph of text and a sigh.
Fortunately, after reading these stories, I will still cry happily and feel really painful. Yu Fusheng's illusion has not disappeared, but the truth of the rest of his life still exists.
I stayed outside for a while last night and vaguely felt mosquitoes around me. When I went back, I found that my hands and legs were stung several times. I am not an advocate of attracting mosquitoes. I often know that I have been bitten until I see a mosquito bite. In most cases, the result of mosquito bites is erythema, which is neither painful nor itchy. But the erythema will last for five or six days before it goes away.
There is an adjustment at night during military training, and you can wear skirts. I wore a long skirt and sat on the grass in the playground for a long time. When I went back, I found that my legs were densely covered with red spots bitten by mosquitoes like measles. I'm scared. I couldn't see my legs at all during that time. My mother wondered, "Don't you know that you were stung like this? ! "As God is my witness, I really don't know.
Although I have many sensitive hobbies, fortunately, some parts of my body are dull, such as the reaction to mosquito bites.
However, feeling dull is not without feeling.
You can see the spots on your hands and legs by looking down. When you see it, you will think I was attacked, too.
In this sense, I am also poor. I have digested all the toxins from mosquito bites in silence.
It's like screaming when someone is injured, or screaming, crying, holding the wound to show off and show weakness. But like me, the wound doesn't seem to matter. I'm not even qualified to cry. Even if I do, no one will stop to comfort me.
Many times, the difference between people is not the severity of the injury, but whether they will let others know that they are injured. And "injury" is also a very subjective existence. Maybe you think it's okay as long as you're not dead, but I think heartbreak is like heart death.
Injury is something that every one of us must experience. Everyone has different tolerance and different body reactions, but the injury is actually real.
The world is really not sad for those who cry, nor happy for those who laugh.
No one is happy when digesting injuries.
On Tanabata, many people are on the way to prove their love, and I am on my way to Luoyang to give a lecture.
Single dog people were attacked by the frog Loneliness today. People who show their love don't let go of roses or wallets. In fact, there is no need for pain, and there is no need to be complacent.
Qixi is also an ordinary day. It can be the beginning or the end of love.
However, thanks to the blessing of the Cowherd and the Weaver Girl, Tanabata became like a bridging bird, flapping its wings and making people uneasy-
At this time, an ambiguity can make people see the affection of love; A broken promise will make people see the casual love.
Because it is Tanabata, everything is filtered, or gentle and pleasant, or indifferent and alienated.
In the name of Tanabata, whether it is intimacy or farewell, it will undoubtedly make sweetness and pain stronger.
However, Tanabata is really an ordinary day. Only 24 hours, there will be sunrise and sunset.
Fan Chengda intoned, "May I be as bright as a star, as a monarch, as a moon."
May all people put the wishes of the stars and the moon on "every night", not just "tonight". If you miss the starry moonlight tonight, you can still look forward to the bright streamer tomorrow.
When the sunset glow burns, the clouds seem to beep. Different shades of light and color are rolling freely, spewing out from the gaps of rows of high-rise buildings in the city-the city is powerless at this time.
Humans have tried their best to trap the sky with cities. The sky only needs a clear sky, and we can use clouds to relax and open up Wan Li.
Standing on a busy street corner, under the cloudy sky, you will feel particularly lonely and powerless.
On the one hand, it is the urge of worldly glitz, and on the other hand, it is "coming with the clouds above the cliff, one by one." This seems to be a disagreement that can never be sealed.
People always try their best to show their existence, such as wrapping the sky with buildings and changing the water flow with dams; And I tried to travel through many places, trying to stay in such a sky more, just to make myself more "nothing" in life, for example, to reward more "unintentional clouds" and do more "unintentional things".
After all, whether it's dogs under white clouds or having sex, we can't stop the vast Wan Li under clear skies.
A new day has begun.
I've been very busy recently. I posted things one by one n times and posted them on the wall. It's torture to cross everything out. . .
I also read some books about Van Gogh.
Now the placemats and plates at home are van Gogh's. Even the first two hair bands are Van Gogh's.
Van Gogh was easily poisoned. Just like his uncontrollable religious fanaticism and madness-but without fanaticism, there is no complete devotion. Van Gogh is pure, pure compassion for the world, pure pursuit of painting.
Seeing his desperate devotion, including himself, will be unbearable-he is paying homage to his beliefs with himself; But we will also feel lucky-a pure man like Van Gogh will spare no effort to let us see the wonderful life.
Are you devoted to love, or are you devoted to love? In the end, it will be a completely different state of life!
Reason or madness is only a measure of the world. I want to devote myself to love, even if I am crazy, even if I am in hot water, I don't want to consume a little light because of difficulties, but who am I?
When I was thirteen or fourteen, I met my best friend. For such a long time, I met Liao Liao. Three or five years may not be a word. But you can call at any time. We are my favorite friendship between gentlemen as light as water.
She is in Hong Kong, and will continue to catch up with the company's early morning video conference tomorrow.
Time and space apart, I think we meet again tonight.
After that, the chat content involves personal affairs, so it is recorded in words.
I miss you.
I miss you when I cry.
If we hug and cry,
Can we go back to our youth,
Just heartbroken for a relationship?
When our hearts are broken only by extramarital affairs,
A broken heart can be reassembled,
If there is a crack, you can continue to breathe.
Fortunately, I have you.
Tonight, cry together.
Time, space, everything.
We are still here.
In particular, we are young and energetic,
Never absent.
So, tonight will be particularly painful,
Still with the ignorance of entering the world.
There is so much dust in the world,
It hurt my eyes,
Fortunately, we still have tears.
I miss you so much.
I still want to hug you when I cry.
In order not to be separated,
Try to live,
Try to breathe.
Recently, my throat is inflamed and I have lost my voice. From New Year's Eve to 2020, cold symptoms also broke out. Therefore, the first day of the new year is spent in voice loss, headache, sneezing, coughing and runny nose.
When I was sick, I got a lot of assurances. Because you don't have to talk, because you don't have to think. Get a different sense of security because of insensitivity.
Therefore, there is really nothing to be happy about, and there is nothing to be anxious about-turning around and facing the endless sky; Turn around and come back, Zhan Yan is the world of mortals.
In 2020, I hope we can be calm, natural and safe. Come on, turn around from yourself.
In the past year, I feel as if I have done a lot, but I feel as if I have nothing. This extreme contradiction has always divided me, sometimes satisfied and sometimes panicked.
In a life that cannot be copied,
But there are always thousands of deja vu.
I don't know where you will end up,
I just hope the direction is like your name,
Bright and clear, spacious and comfortable.
Along the way,
I will be there.
After two days of postgraduate entrance examination, the fate of many people began to be different.
After two days of invigilation, I was too tired to eat at home. . .
It is foggy today.
I ate something in a hurry at noon and took some photos of the cold brought by fog in East Lake.
At the end of the invigilation in the evening, I took the berries I bought for mango as Christmas hair accessories, made several hairpin non-stop, and finally felt alive.
I just like these useless things-squatting on the bench in the cold wind; Proud of the unique possession in handmade works; I managed to pull a banyan tree to the roof. . .
These useless things, when I was so tired that I wanted to vomit, finally felt alive for a moment.
No matter how these two days have changed your future, please leave yourself a way out.
Recently, big and small competitions have made me suddenly realize-
Did I choose to teach because I love it?
The answer is yes.
Yes, I really love teaching. I really like the podium. I really like being with students.
Therefore, if it is because of love, it is because of love. All utilitarian prayers are blasphemies against love-I can't always think about "winning" or I need to know what "winning" is.
The real victory is that you go because of love. Even if someone tries to push you into the water, you still have the ability not to drown and always keep the courage to move forward.
The real win is not always expecting to meet better students, nor always complaining about why you can't meet better students-you always want to win or lose by luck, you are a gambler.
What is the significance of teaching? I keep asking myself.
Didn't I always believe that teaching is for educating people? ! Why is it related to utilitarianism, but it has shaken the initial heart? Deviated from faith?
Wei Wu envied the persistence of the wooden bridge towards darkness, which made me cry! Knowing that I can't do it, don't you make me proud!
But why do I doubt it? Why do I hesitate?
The student said that my eyes lit up when I mentioned teaching.
Yes, there is always light in my heart. Now these jumping, intermittent and hesitant lights are flashing great determination: I have met many excellent students and there are many students with average qualifications around me. Education is not simply screened out, but shaped. Let the excellent become excellent, and let the ordinary become excellent.
I've really put my gains and losses behind me. I really feel more secure than before.
Because I really love teaching, love makes me understand that education makes all ordinary students shine their own light, which is the real education.
Thank you dear Li Xia for reminding me, and thank you for being my big data.
The future is uncertain, but it can be predicted.
Sean once said that "waiting" is a charming word.
I think "company" is a more attractive word more and more.
In the afternoon, I went to Yu Yingchao's lecture. When I met the students a few years ago, I hugged each other and took pictures. I remembered the messages I received these days-
Because we had dinner together, that humble little place to eat became a place where he calmed down afterwards;
Because of the class together, every scenery with different shades has become the reason why she misses me;
Because we spent time together, it has become her habit to talk to me about all kinds of things in time;
When I was editing these words, my best friend from college was still sending me complete information. . .
Loneliness is often more lonely in the hustle and bustle of the day, and more chiseled in the boundless night. And companionship, in various forms, let us constantly appease and retain.
Our meeting with each other may be just a flash of lightning, but companionship can last for a long time.
Thank you for your company. Whether it is a real hug or words, it is the warmth I can touch.
Mango asked me before going to bed: Why have many things disappeared for a long time?
I replied: because of time! Time can change many things. Time can rot wood, collapse masonry, kill life and change people's hearts. . . So, after a long time, many things are gone or changed.
Say that finish this paragraph, the in the mind somewhat awe-inspiring, time will eventually take away from us? Leave what?
Just like love: when we ask "no one loves you like me", the other person will also ask "no one loves you like me".
And at this moment, I will not hesitate to answer, in the future, will I lose to time?
Recently, South Korea's auditions Ku and Ahn Jae-hyun were violently torn apart. Three years ago, two people who loved the whole world so much that they couldn't wait to be jealous, but now they have torn each other to the point where there is no bottom line.
Time turns into a cruel sword, waving it at each other without reservation, just like the oath of the year.
I always feel empty when I see such a situation. What will happen to love in the end?
While confirming that the other person no longer loves, all the self-confidence and mirror images built for himself because of love are all destroyed.
Despair, at this time, often comes from a new understanding of yourself-you are so unbearable! In that person's heart, in the real world!
Sometimes, the parsimony of time will make us as thin as cicadas. A gust of wind can break wings and never fly again.
Sometimes, mellow time will make us grow old like wine. A gust of wind can make people intoxicated and never want to wake up again.
Finally, what will time leave us? ——
Let time pass.
I'll leave it to you.