The prelude to the music "Bao Qingtian" began.

Qin Shihuang: (singing) Qin Shihuang! The unity of the world is moving towards the outline! Not afraid of the sun, not afraid of the wind, afraid of assassins to assassinate me! What should I do? What should I do?

Samurai: Report ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Qin Shihuang: For what?

Samurai: (singing "Hug Hug") Measure for measure! Your Majesty, someone is looking for you outside!

Qin Shihuang: Who?

Samurai: This man claims to be nameless, saying that he brought the assassin's head to your majesty!

Qin Shihuang: Are you serious?

Samurai: Really!

Qin Shihuang: Announce it quickly!

Eunuch: Xuanwuming went to the temple.

(The catwalk started, and the unknown stepped on the catwalk. After he appeared, he went up to Qin Shihuang and shook hands with him. )

Unknown: NICETOMEETYOU

Qin Shihuang: NICETOMEETYOUTOO!

Eunuch: One bow, two bows, three bows.

Wu Ming: (kneeling on one leg) kowtow to your majesty!

Qin Shihuang: Wu Ming, let me ask you something!

Eunuch: Your Majesty, monarchs generally don't call me a widow.

Qin Shihuang: Oh, yes! How could I forget this! Unknown, widow ~ ~ ~ ~ widow asks you.

Eunuch: Not a widow, a widow!

Qin Shihuang: Unknown, let me ask you, did you really get the assassin's head?

Eunuch: No way, show me the evidence!

Qin Shihuang: Are there any witnesses?

Samurai: I can testify.

Eunuch: objection. Objection. The opposing defense friend bribed our team members to commit perjury.

Qin Shihuang: Rejected! Samurai, say it!

Samurai: The assassin's head has been sent to the kitchen.

Qin Shihuang: Good! Unknown, please tell me the whole story quickly.

Unknown: Yes! Your majesty! At that time, we were asked to form the Gang of Four who stabbed Qin, Tian Kong, broken arrow, Fei Xue and the Minister.

(Four people sing "Meteor Shower" on stage)

Unknown: however, they don't know that I am actually loyal to your majesty. I am actually undercover! One day, I faced the sky alone.

Sky: (looking up at the sky indifferently) The moon is really round from a distance! Sometimes it's not very round, why is it so round now? Because it's round!

Phantom nameless: (clapping) Good poem! Why does brother Tian have such a sigh?

Sky: The next time I think that the dream of stabbing Qin has not come true, I am full of emotion and poetry. Ah! Sea! You are so fucking big!

Unknown: So I'm going to kill the sky, and I'm going to use my unique skill-the first quarter of the eighth set of broadcast gymnastics!

(The music "Broadcast Gymnastics" begins, and the nameless "Stretching Exercise" will kill the sky)

Sky: You, you, you ~ ~ ~ (fall to the ground)

Phantom unknown: Sorry, I'm undercover!

Broken arrow: (Sword refers to unknown)

(With Infernal Affairs Dialogue)

Xue Fei: Why are you killing each other?

Broken arrow: He's undercover!

Xue Fei: Who is undercover?

Unknown Phantom and broken arrow: Him!

Xue Fei: Be quiet! As usual-punch!

Phantom nameless broken arrow looked up at the sky and made a deep shape! Then punch. "Scissors and stone cloth" Scissors and stone cloth

Qin Shihuang: Who won in the end?

Unknown: it's the minister! Because that fool can only produce scissors!

Qin Shihuang: What happened later?

Unknown: (singing "Later")

(in the song. )

Xue Fei: Canjian, so you are undercover!

Why don't you fight back?

Canjian: Because I love you!

Yueru: Master! '

Qin Shihuang: Who is this man?

Unknown: This person is the personal servant girl of Canjian.

Qin Shihuang: Is this girl a woman?

Unknown: Your Majesty is really wise, SHEN WOO! At that time, Yueru shouted "Master, I will avenge you" and stabbed Xue Fei with her sword. Then I drew my sword and killed Yueru! In this way, all assassins will be wiped out one by one.

Qin Shihuang: (Laughter) Ha ha ha ha ha ha! Unknown, you lied to me.

Unknown: Why did your Majesty say that?

Qin Shihuang: Because I have seen broken arrow. That day, just as I was thinking, I suddenly heard the wind whispering. See broken arrow.

Falling from the sky.

Canjian: (flies) I'm here to assassinate you! (The magical Qin Shihuang ignores me) I'm here to assassinate you! (Still ignore) I'm here to assassinate you (ignore) I beg you not to ignore me! I'm here to assassinate you!

The magical Qin Shihuang: (looking at broken arrow) Depressed!

Canjian: Why are you depressed?

The magical Qin Shihuang: Do you read four books, five classics and four books?

Canjian: You mean The Analects of Confucius, The Book of Songs, The Doctrine of the Mean and The University. I do. Which book are you reading?

Fantasy Qin Shihuang: University

Canjian: How do you feel?

The magical Qin Shihuang: I think "University" is so depressing.

Canjian: True bosom friend, I feel the same way.

Qin Shihuang: So we two intimate friends talked and drank together, so you lied to me when you said that broken arrow could only produce scissors, because he could only produce stones! So I guess all your plots should be like this! First of all, you killed the sky purely by mistake, because I have your criminal record here, and the judge acquitted you of manslaughter. On the same day, you studied martial arts together, using the eighth set of second side movements of broadcast gymnastics, because the record said that the sky died of a broken hand muscle. As for the broken arrow, I have sent Holmes and sherlock holmes to check it out.

Unknown: Sherlock Holmes and Sherlock Holmes? Who are they?

Eunuch: I'm Holmes.

Samurai: I am volley water.

H: We are detectives from Shen Yong. According to our investigation, Cancan and Xue Fei had a relationship for a long time.

Qin Shihuang: So I guess they were enjoying the moon and flowers that day.

Snow broken arrow's classic pose for Titanic. Music)

Xue Fei: The moon is really round tonight!

Canjian: Yes! The moon is really round tonight!

Xue Fei: Don't you have anything to whisper to me?

Canjian: Yes!

Xue Fei: What?

Canjian: The moon is really round tonight!

Xue Fei: What! ? !

Canjian: Actually, I really have something to say to you.

Xue Fei: What's this?

Canjian: I don't want to stab Qin!

Qin Shihuang: Xue Fei knew Canjian's temper and that he was telling the truth! So she took out her cell phone and dialed your number.

Xue Fei: Hey! Anonymous?

Unknown: It's me.

Xue Fei: Unknown, I'm Xue Fei. I told you, remnant sword, don't try to stab Qin! So I want to die with him, and then you take our heads to see Qin Shihuang and kill him! Complete our great cause of stabbing Qin! (hangs up)

(Flying snow and sword mutually assured destruction)

Qin Shihuang: As for the moon you mentioned, he may have rushed out and cut down 300 knives for flying snow.

Yueru: (cutting snow) 1, 2, 3, 4, 5-5 What's behind it? Yes, 1 1! 1 1、27、36、 123、234、300!

Qin Shihuang: Then you brought me their heads, didn't you?

Unknown: Your majesty's imagination is so rich that it reminds you that the remnant sword doesn't want to stab Qin. Yes, I was playing martial arts with the sky that day and accidentally killed him! But I didn't use the second paragraph of broadcast gymnastics, but the third paragraph of body rotation. I remember chatting with Canjian that day. Canjian said he didn't want to stab Qin, and then wrote me a word: Tianxia.

Qin Shihuang: The word "the world" is just what I want. I didn't expect Canjian to be my bosom friend!

Unknown: Xue Fei also heard the news at that time. She pulled out her sword and put it across the neck of the remnant sword!

Xue Fei: Why don't you stab Qin? Believe it or not, I will kill you!

Can Jian: I once had a sincere feeling in front of me. I didn't cherish it, and I regretted it when I lost it. The saddest thing in life is this. If God can give me another chance to start over, I will say three words to that girl: I love you. If I want to add a deadline before this relationship, I hope it is 10 thousand years!

(Snow is moved to tears)

Yueru: Master! No, don't kill my master.

Unknown: At that time, when the moon rushed up, it hit Xue Fei, and Xue Fei's sword suddenly plunged into the body of the remnant sword.

Xue Fei: Ah! Broken arrow! (Yes, Yueru) You bitch!

Unknown: Xue Fei cut off Yueru with his sword and then committed suicide!

Qin Shihuang: Are you here to kill me today? Okay, then.

(Qin Shihuang throws a dagger at the unknown and closes his eyes)

Unknown: I have a dagger, but you are unarmed. Is it unfair?

Qin Shihuang: (laughing insidiously) Haha-(pulling out a long sword from behind)

(nameless fall to the ground)

Samurai: (sniffing at Unknown) Your Majesty, Unknown has been scared to death!

Modern version of Snow White's funny drama script

Snow White

In the severe winter, goose feather-like snowflakes are flying all over the sky. A queen gave birth to a girl named Snow White. She was as white as snow, as red as blood and as black as ebony. But before Snow White grew up, her queen mother died. Soon after, the king married another wife. The queen is very beautiful and as kind as her predecessor. She has a magic mirror based on dual-core Intel Xeon processor.

Muichi

(New Queen, Mirror, Snow White)

Queen: Mirror, where are our family going to play this spring?

Mirror: Go to Hawaii, where it is as warm as summer all year round, much warmer than this.

Queen: It's strange that my daughter won't become a princess with black snow.

Mirror: To the Alps?

Queen: OK, we will leave next week.

Snow White: Mom, playing with the magic mirror again!

Queen: No, I'm talking to her about where to play this year, skiing in the Alps.

Snow White: OK, I'll tell Dad.

Muji

(New Queen, Mirror, Snow White, King, Guard, Robber, Riding Prince)

The king's family set out.

Snow White: Mirror, I want to go to QQ and MSN, can I?

Mirror: I can only play for an hour. I have to blog later.

Snow White: OK.

Queen: honey, you see, since I drank my wife's oral liquid, my waist is no longer sore, my legs are no longer painful, my teeth are fine, my appetite is good, my body is great and my taste is good.

King: Why are you blushing?

Queen: It's refreshing.

Suddenly, a small black jeep suddenly appeared in front of the king's motorcade.

Robber: robbery ... robbery.

Guard: Put down your pistol and become a Buddha.

Robber: To be or not to be, that's the question. At this time, a person fell from the sky.

Bike Prince: Avalanche.

At this point, the robber fell to the ground.

Riding Prince: Get up. What's the matter? You must rob.

The robber was deeply grateful, so the new queen, the magic mirror, Snow White, the king, the bodyguard, the robber and the bicycle prince joined hands and sang a song.

Everyone: heart to heart, hand in hand, we believe that the distance between us is no longer far away, heart to heart, hand in hand, proudly flying to the endless blue sky.

Robber: You think I'm so easy to deal with, robber acupuncturist.

Everyone was stopped. The robbers poisoned the princess for ten days, robbed the motorcade, took the princess away and fled alone.

Muzo

At this time, the magic mirror lit up and everyone solved the hole. People asked the cycling prince with high martial arts to find the princess, and the others went back to the police. But the princess is in the robber's car. She quietly escaped from the car and went to the house on the side of the road for help. The seven dwarfs are on their way home.

(Dwarf Forest, Oven, Vesta, Egg, Osia, En, Snow White)

Lin: Hey, I really want to accept my old age! After a day's work, look, my waist is flashing. Osia, be gentle. It hurts to death.

Oven: Lin, look at this. Calcium in calcium oral liquid has miraculous effects for both internal and external use. You can drink a bottle when you are shaking, and a bottle when you are injured. Look, these are blue bottles and fruits. Old people like it. Calcium in calcium oral liquid, water of youth, water of friendship, and nutrition designated by the chef.

Eggs: Where can I buy them?

Oven: It is sold in all major pharmacies in China. Please look for the anti-counterfeiting marks of Xiao Huang Gou, Wang and Wang when buying.

Hmm: I'll get the door first.

Well, when you open the door,

Hmm: Ah ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Vista: What's the matter?

Hmm: Burglary.

Eggs: Please pay attention to the people inside. You are surrounded. Drop your weapon immediately. You have the right to remain silent. What you say will be used against you in a court of law.

Lin: Why doesn't it respond?

Hmm: ah! There is a man sleeping in my bed.

Snow White: Are you the host?

Hmm: You, you, who are you?

Snow White: After my family was stabbed by bad guys, I was kidnapped by bad guys and poisoned again. Fortunately, I escaped. I hope someone can help me.

Osia: You must be Snow White, right?

Snow White: Yes, I am. Can I spend the night?

In the evening, Snow White had dinner and talked with the dwarfs about her and her family's murder experience. The dwarfs were willing to help her find the antidote and called the palace.

Muji

(Cycling Prince, Snow White, Seven Dwarfs)

Ten days later, Snow White fell, and seven dwarfs were crying beside her. The cycling prince brought the medicine and immediately took it for Snow White.

Snow White: Where am I now?

Prince on a Bike: You are all right in the dwarf's house.

Snow White: Thank you, and thank you, Prince on a bicycle.

At this time, the prince knelt down and proposed to Snow White.

Bike Prince: Will you marry me?

Snow White: I'm willing to do it for you, I'm willing to do it for you, I'm willing to do it for you, and I'm falling from the sky. As long as you sincerely respond with love, I will do anything for you. Snow White sings I Do, and then the music starts. )

wooden cottage

After the wedding

(all)

New Queen: Daughter, I have good news for you. The robber has been caught, and only justice and law await him.

Snow White: Mom, Dad. (Snow White throws herself into her parents' arms)

Bike Prince: Princess, I love you forever.

Snow White: Me too.

Dwarf: How beautiful.

Robber: Don't arrest me, I'm still the one who introduced them! (The robber was taken off the stage)

Global termination