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On the afternoons of 20 18, 10 and 13, the first solo exhibition "Looking at My Painting from the River" opened in Hangzhou, and the audience was bursting with popularity.

Who's Jiang Youbai?

He is the great-grandson of Chiang Kai-shek, a veritable fourth generation of the Chiang family.

In the interview, this noble son who said that he went out to school when he was a child and was escorted by bodyguards experienced:

When I was a teenager, my family came down.

My father died at the age of 20,

I started my business at the age of 27 and closed down twice.

Now he is the owner of Taiwan Province Orange Fruit Design Company and the founder of the most profitable design company in Taiwan Province Province.

Jiang Youbai once told reporters in an interview that he is a military commander, aggressive and bellicose, and it is precisely because of his indomitable spirit that he constantly inspires his potential in the face of ups and downs and turbulent fate, becoming more and more brave and comfortable.

Not long ago, I watched a documentary about Jiang Youbai, my times and me, which brought us closer to this successful and down-to-earth middle-aged man.

And through his story, we will also bring more thoughts to our growth.

Jiang Youbai was born like Jia Baoyu, born with a piece of jade. During the ten years of his birth, he enjoyed the prosperity and glory of the world.

Jiang Youbai once wrote in "The Path under the Cliff": "I grew up like an illusory dream, or you can say it is a mirage."

Jiang Youbai said that being chased by people around him as a child made him feel that he would naturally become a great president in the future. He said that once a meal could cost 1 10,000 to 20,000 dollars, and the scenery was the same.

However, with the death of his grandfather Jiang Jingguo, the Chiang family declined rapidly, and his father Jiang Xiaoyong moved his family to Montreal.

Because of the language barrier, he can't integrate into the group. When he was a teenager, he didn't do anything wrong, but he was often called "Jiang thief" and "Jiang thief" by his classmates. And he suddenly realized that there was no money at home.

He was confused, miserable and depressed. . .

Later, when he was studying in America, he had an absurd time.

In his own words, "I have done everything you can think of and everything you can't think of."

Psychologist Frank cardelle said: "The most unfortunate fact in life is that most of the first major sufferings we encounter come from family, and this kind of suffering can be inherited."

Jiang Youbai's experience is more tragic than that of ordinary people, because he has been growing up under a magnifying glass.

It was not until his father died at the age of 20 that Jiang Youbai began to think about what to do with his life. ...

There will always be a moment when people will suddenly wake up, break through the fog, understand what kind of life they want, and then put all your eggs in one basket and move on.

Jiang Youbai's first happiness level-family background, the secret of customs clearance is to get rid of the shackles brought by family background, dare to give yourself a chance to face yourself and tear the past.

Life is like this sometimes. How to greet the beginning without saying goodbye clearly?

Psychoanalyst Freud has a theory of mind, which states that everyone has an "I" at three different stages: ID, ego and superego. Being born in a family creates the happiness and pain of the ID, the awakening of self-consciousness determines the future direction of life, and the superego is the self-discipline and promotion of a person's success.

Jiang Youbai began the perfect transformation of self-stage.

"Today, as a descendant, if you want to enjoy the cool with the trees planted by your predecessors, you are not qualified to take this surname."

This is what Jiang Youbai said to himself.

From then on, I stopped asking about politics, started my own career, and achieved myself with my own efforts.

In 2003, Jiang Youbai and his younger brother Jiang Youchang founded Orange Fruit Design Company, mainly engaged in industrial design, brand packaging and space design.

However, everything must follow the laws of things, and life is not simple.

I started my business at the age of 27 and closed down twice in just four years.

When talking about this history, he admitted that his son-in-law was aloof and withdrawn, and it was really difficult to be a partner.

However, he readily accepted that life has smoothed his edges and corners again and again.

When employees mentioned him, they were full of praise: "This is the place where I admire my boss the most. He is a man who can bend over. Even if everyone knows who he is, he can still bend over. "

Finally, he got up again and succeeded.

He confidently told the media: "It is difficult for the design community in Taiwan Province Province to find a higher profit than me."

Jiang Youbai's second barrier to happiness-growth, the secret of customs clearance is that as long as you work hard, God has his own arrangements.

Carol Dwek, a doctor of psychology in the United States, once said in Lifelong Growth: "Growth is a lifetime thing, and it has nothing to do with age.

It is mentioned that success is not innate or external, and the key lies in thinking mode: fixed thinking mode and growth thinking mode.

The main feature of thinking set is that human talent is immutable. People with this mode of thinking always want to prove their ability at all times and like to shift the responsibility to others.

The main feature of growth thinking is that people's ability can be cultivated hard. People with this mode of thinking believe that although people are born with different talents and qualifications, they can all be changed through hard work.

Jiang Youbai is a practitioner of growth thinking, and his efforts and enterprising run through his dictionary every day.

To understand the changes of Jiang Youbai in recent years, the most intuitive thing is the change of his appearance.

He insisted on fitness, and some netizens joked that he suddenly turned himself into dwayne douglas johnson's figure.

His work and rest life is extremely regular, and it has been like a day for more than ten years.

Go out at 7 o'clock

Working hours are from 8: 00 to 14: 00.

15: 00-2100 with children

Continue working at 22:00 p.m.

He himself called this kind of life a hellish life. What he said to his children was: "I don't want them to force themselves like him."

Behind all this, in fact, it stems from Jiang Youbai's long-term self-discipline, which also allows us to understand the reasons for his success today.

At any time, a person who is hard enough for himself will take the initiative in life and achieve himself.

In August this year, a piece of news about Jiang Youbai's divorce appeared on the news page.

I watched Jiang Youbai's love story once, which was really colorful.

The most striking thing is the fairy-tale love between him and his wife Lin Hengyi. The taste of Mary Su interpreted by the media can immediately stage the whole drama that the overbearing president falls in love with me.

It is said that when Jiang Youbai started chasing Lin Hengyi, it was a classic version of the prodigal son. He gave up all his bad hobbies such as going to nightclubs.

When in love, Jiang Youbai once said to the paparazzi, "It doesn't matter what you write about me, but don't hurt her."

Facing the test of Lin Hengyi, he also said sweetly, "She showed me how long I could stand on the cliff, which proved my patience. I am patient with the right people, the right things and what I believe. "

Even when they got married in 2003, Jiang Youbai asked all the guests to wear black to take care of his wife who didn't lose weight after giving birth, creating a strange black wedding.

Spoiling a wife is probably every woman's dream.

After giving birth to his daughter, he also started the pet route. In order to take care of his daughter, he goes home on time at two o'clock every afternoon.

However, no matter how perfect the combination is, it cannot pass the time. When 15' s relationship turned into a divorce agreement, we can only sigh that this situation has become a memory, even if it is disconsolate, it is helpless.

We don't explore the real reason for their divorce, and we don't know whether they are happy with each other.

Only through Jiang Youbai's marriage story can we understand some truth.

1. Even if the combination is perfect, the relationship will change with time.

The book Men's Affairs written by writer Junichi Watanabe mentioned that with the changes of age and physiology, men's and women's expectations are quite different.

For example: women yearn for marriage, and men are full of anxiety about marriage; The more women love, the more devoted they are, and the more men love, the more tired they are. Women prefer to solve problems, but men like to escape.

Therefore, in a relationship, even if Jiang Youbai Lin Hengyi, who was originally called a match made in heaven, started so well, with the passage of time, two people will drift apart emotionally because of their personality, environment and personal growth rhythm.

Other people's stories will always be a mirror of your own life. You can learn from them, but you can never apply them. You can envy them, but you can never read them yourself.

Adjusting the direction according to one's own rhythm, accepting the change of a relationship and adapting oneself to the change are always the first attitude to deal with the development of feelings.

2. It is better to give each other a better self than to control the relationship.

In the relationship between Jiang Youbai and Lin Hengyi, we don't see many details, but from Jiang Youbai's self-discipline and career growth, we can perceive Jiang Youbai's efforts and enterprising.

As for Lin Hengyi, in an interview in Jiang Youbai, he mentioned a small detail. After giving birth, Lin Hengyi insisted on taking care of her children without the help of a nanny. See here, there will be a lot of feelings. As the post-80s generation, most of them will have their own side, especially when facing family chores. Lin Hengyi didn't escape all this. Jiang Youbai also said in the conversation that many practices of his wife changed his lifestyle and cognition.

We think that Lin Hengyi is a woman who is smart enough to face life, and she constantly improves her experience in her marriage with Jiang Youbai. Otherwise, we probably won't see this relationship end peacefully without any tears and dog blood.

Only a woman who really enriches herself can face everything calmly.

Gao recently had a passage in Chess Manual:

What is a good feeling?

Let us all become better ourselves, which is the most important thing.

What is a better self?

Being virtuous, sincere and open is the most important thing in life, not falling in love.

This assertion immediately aroused everyone's approval.

In our life, love will never be the main color of our life. Let love and marriage add to our lives, not because of loneliness, but because conditions control a relationship and make it a timely help. That kind of treatment is too hard

The writer Su Qin also said: "The best way to love someone is to manage yourself and give the other person a quality lover. If you don't try your best to be nice to someone, that person will love you desperately. Earthly feelings inevitably have a realistic side: you are valuable and your contribution is valuable. "

Just like what was written in the news: "Jiang Lin and his wife divorced by peaceful agreement, and both made the greatest concessions and compromises", then in this relationship, neither of them lost anything, but gave both sides confidence in their future life.

Jiang Youbai's third level of happiness-feelings, the secret of customs clearance is that no matter what kind of relationship you are in, don't forget to improve yourself and be a better yourself.

This is your greatest confidence in the face of relationship changes.

The story is short and profound.

We often say that it's not that you can't live a good life after reading so many truths, but that you want a good internal drive. If you are really ready, you might as well sign up to join us. Here's how to be a better person.