Recently, Shuo Shuo's mother is a little annoyed. Kindergarten has never started, and Shuo Shuo will not stop at home. Grandma is tired of staying, and grandma is tired of staying. She kept saying that she wanted to play with the children, so she was too angry to get dressed. She was so angry that Shuo Shuo's mother taught Shuo Shuo a lesson, but Shuo Shuo didn't seem to repent, and she still went her own way and cried in bed, which made Shuo Shuo's mother very helpless.

When a child makes a mistake, the parents' first reaction is to criticize the child. The reason is simple and direct. This is how they are trained. Can't they continue to raise children? For children who make mistakes, not criticizing them immediately has not encouraged their arrogance? Only by suppressing the wrong momentum of the child can he remember and correct it for a long time.

In general family education, there is indeed such an educational misunderstanding: only criticism can make a child correct his mistakes, but is this in line with the normal psychological development of the child? Parents, do you know what happens when children make mistakes?

1. What will criticism and education make children look like after they make mistakes? 1, hitting children's self-confidence.

Many parents believe that it is normal for children to criticize when they make mistakes. On the one hand, we can urge them to correct their mistakes; On the other hand, it can make them stronger and improve their ability to resist setbacks. But it often proves that these ideas of parents have not been realized in the end. When children are criticized by their parents, children in a weak position bow their heads, dare not make eye contact with their parents, and look depressed. These performances will be internalized psychologically, which will cause a deep blow to their self-confidence.

2. Children tend to become more angry.

Parents can put themselves in their shoes. If they are criticized by leaders, what is their psychology? Are you angry? If someone asks you for something, will you teach him a lesson for no reason? In fact, children have similar psychology. After the child is criticized, his inner anger can't be vented to his parents, but can only be passed on to his brother and sister, or vented to his kitten and puppy.

Children become distrustful of their parents.

People build relationships of mutual trust by doing one thing at a time. When parents are always giving their children a bad face and training their children, how can they make their children closer to their parents? After a long time, it will affect the parent-child relationship between parents and children, parents will become suspicious, children will distrust their parents, children will not feel the atmosphere of love generated by the family, and inner helplessness will arise. In serious cases, they may run away from home.

Modern educational thought shows that instead of bringing negative influence to children through criticism, it is better to form positive encouragement to children through "love". I think in the process of educating children, parents can completely break the original way of thinking and adopt a more humane way of education, because no one will change because of criticism, and the premise of change is "love."

Second, no one will change because of criticism. The premise of change is because of "love" 1, and gentle communication with children can't lower the status of parents.

Many parents still have a psychology that they are the parents and authority to educate their children and cannot appear in a condescending manner. Even if their own way or statement may be incorrect, parents should pretend to be correct, otherwise they will lose face in front of their children. In fact, parents don't have to think so at all. Parents treat their children gently and communicate with them at the same height. On the contrary, it is a more enlightened performance, and children will not look down on their parents because of this.

2. Criticizing children too much will lead to the lack of love for children.

As mentioned above, when a child loses his sense of security in the family because of too much criticism, it will inevitably lead to the lack of love, not only in the present, but also may affect the child's life, and the child may dilute the affection between people and become ruthless. Therefore, when parents communicate with their children on the premise of "love", children will not only easily change their own problems, but also will not affect their healthy psychological development.

3. Children will respect their parents more if they are respected.

A child is also an independent individual. Young as he is, he yearns for independence and respect. Parents' criticism of their children is not based on mutual respect. Parents will consider themselves as high-ranking authorities. If the child has a condition, parents need to point it out severely and ask him to correct it within a time limit. However, if the child is not respected, even if he makes a change, he is dealing with the "errand" of his parents. Only children have a respected heart.