Postpartum depression, for me, I thought it was a sign of "cowardice". Unexpectedly, I was so proud that I could not escape this robbery!

At the age of 37, I suddenly became pregnant with a second child. I am so excited! As happy as an old man. It has been 8 years since I gave birth to Dabao, and I have always wanted a second child, but I have never been pregnant because of my busy work, and I have given up for several years! There is a saying, every child comes into this world, which is doomed by God!

But I wasn't happy for long, and unhappy things followed! First of all, when I was examined for the first time, the doctor said that I had threatened abortion and occasionally brown secretions came out from below. The doctor advised me not to go to work, because I am old and prone to accidents. Finally, after discussing with my husband, I decided to give up my job and go home to have children. However, when I was three months old, I suddenly took a shower and was hospitalized for a few days. Then when I was four months old, I suddenly bled again at two o'clock in the middle of the night and went to the hospital to give birth. When I was seven months old, I almost gave birth prematurely because of some unhappy things, and went to the hospital to have a baby. How painful those days were. Let's not talk about that. Which woman who gave birth to a child doesn't feel pain, tore her heart and wanted to die. She screamed with pain and her hair was in a mess. Perhaps it was the most embarrassing time to fall in love with a beautiful woman, and men can never understand it!

But these are nothing! More bitterness and tiredness are behind! I gave birth to my first child. I have never taken care of my children. I have no experience at all. Dabao has been taken care of by his grandparents. I have been working in other places and only go home to accompany my children on holidays. When I gave birth to my second child, I didn't give birth yet! Mother-in-law said that they were old and their health was not as good as before, so they could not help to have a second child. She also said that I should at least take her to kindergarten in Bao Xiao, and then I would consider going out to work. To tell you the truth, I'm sorry to hear that. First of all, I have no experience with children, and I am a little scared! Secondly, I can't go out to work anymore. I can't accept it. Three years later, Bao Xiao will go to kindergarten. I am 40 years old. If I go out to work again, it should be less valuable, right? However, the old man is old and wants to enjoy his old age. They don't want to work so hard to understand!

So, I was alone with my two children for more than three years. My husband works in other places and can't help anything. In recent years, I have hardly slept for five hours every day. The baby is one and a half years old before giving up breastfeeding. Every night he gets up and drinks night milk, sometimes sleeping for about two hours a night. He continues to take care of the baby during the day, and he has to do housework. After putting Bao Xiao to bed, he had to get up and help Dabao with his homework. After drinking milk all night, I got up in the middle of the night to nurse my baby and lay in bed. My heart vibrated violently several times. I feel horrible. I immediately sat up and dared not lie down for a long time. I went to the hospital for an examination the next day. The doctor said it was nothing serious. At that time, I guessed that it was because I didn't sleep well that this situation was caused. Because of this, I made up my mind to quit breast-feeding, and I always found it difficult to quit, because Bao Xiao was too clingy to me at ordinary times, but I didn't expect it to be done in only three days. Originally, it was also very happy. I thought I could finally have a good sleep at night, but I still can't sleep well. I wake up at least three times a night, sometimes five or six times exaggeratedly. Sometimes I wake up in a dream, and sometimes I wake up when the baby touches me suddenly. I have to get up and pee every time I wake up. I often can't sleep for a long time after going to the toilet, and I watch the dawn for countless nights.

Because I haven't slept well for a long time, many parts of my body are uncomfortable. I went to the hospital one by one and had a lot of tests. Gynecologists have checked everything, and there is nothing serious, just a little inflammation. The colonoscopy and gastroscopy were also painless, and there was no big problem. I also saw urology, orthopedics and cardiothoracic surgery, all of which were fine. Finally, the doctor advised me to see neurosurgery. As a result, the doctor finally decided that I was slightly postpartum. But after I stopped taking drugs, the whole person didn't feel very good again. Whether it was sleep, physical health or my own mentality, it was a vicious circle. Until one day, I saw someone say, "If you can't live a wonderful life, you might as well lie quietly in the coffin!" I was stunned by this sentence! My heart suddenly became clear. Why should I live so tired?

In fact, there is no depression in this world. I made them myself. Life is so short that happiness is the most important thing! Otherwise, come to this world in vain! As long as we are willing to open the closed door, all problems can be solved!

The first change I made was to go out! It can be said that in recent years, I have been imprisoned in a dark place by myself, unwilling to go out and talk to people. What are you doing outside? I began to go out and meet all the people, acquaintances and strangers I could reach, and chat with them more and talk about whatever I wanted. Chatting with different people, you will find the outside world so interesting! The second thing I do when I go out is exercise. I can run, walk and do aerobics. Anyway, I feel really clear-headed when I move and sweat. How happy I feel that I can live well!

My second change is to stop brushing boring dramas! Forget it! Set aside at least one hour to read every day, learn to calm your heart and brain, and share good things with people around you when you see them! What can I do besides reading? Listen to songs, sing, listen to the radio and watch the news! When a person is quiet, find more songs that he likes to listen to, and he can easily shake with the beat of the songs. If you learn a song, sing along! Quite high! You can really try. Much more realistic than being immersed in an unrealistic idol drama! It's really tiring for women to do housework and take care of children. I really feel very tired. Besides listening to songs, I can also listen to interesting radio stations. For a time, I listened to funny jokes while doing housework, which was quite interesting.

Speaking of watching the news, I want to tell women that it is best not to revolve around children, and the rest is thinking. Take some time to watch the news when you are free, to increase your knowledge and broaden your horizons. Otherwise, you and your man have nothing in common except talking about trivial things. You can share what you see and hear on weekdays with your children or discuss with friends around you. In short, maybe you don't believe it, I have deep feelings! My husband was shocked by my change. My husband said that I can talk to him about so many topics he is interested in now, and he feels incredible!

I haven't been in good shape these years. I didn't call my mother much, and I didn't chat with my brothers and sisters much. Now, if I have something to say to my family. Everyone says I've changed a lot, yes! The doctor said that I had postpartum depression. I didn't want to admit it, so I tried to get rid of it. I don't need to take any more medicine, but I can still live well. As long as I am willing to change, anyone can live so fully! So, don't experience anything with yourself, but try to change yourself in a way that suits you. Even if it's only a small change, we can all have a different wonderful life!

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