Case analysis of children's family education 1
First, the basic situation of the case
(a) the basic situation of children:
Xiaoyu, male, left him to his grandmother after his two-year-old mother divorced. He usually lives with his grandmother and spends weekends with his mother and new father.
(2) Basic problems of children:
In a day's life in kindergarten, there are often conflicts with other children, and according to the teacher's observation, most of them are caused by his rude words and deeds. For example, in the process of playing with his companions, he will fight for toys arbitrarily and unreasonably. Pushing and shoving in line, or deliberately letting others fall. What makes teachers and parents more headache is that children have strong aggressive behavior. Once, he poked a small toy into the mouth of a little girl next door, causing her gums to be damaged. For three days and nights, she complained of pain and was afraid of eating salty food. Another time, she grabbed the ear of the little girl next door with one hand, and the fingers of the other hand turned rapidly, trying to get into the ear hole. The teacher stopped it immediately after discovering it, almost repeating the same trick, and repeated education stopped the dangerous behavior.
(3) Basic information of parents:
The child lives in a single-parent family. My mother is 26 years old, a junior high school student and a freelancer. My mother divorced a foreign man after a year of marriage, and now she moves to Puxi? New dad? At home, every week? New dad? Go back to Pudong to pick up my son for two days. Grandma also divorced and remarried, so now the family members are complicated and the education is biased.
(4) Parents' basic questions:
In the eyes of mothers and grandmothers, children are insignificant. Adults and children have their own range and direction of activities. They don't make any rules for children, have no clear requirements, and the rewards and punishments are unknown. No children? Batman? The concept of, enjoy great autonomy. Parents can't give guidance in words and actions. A child is like a person wandering in the sea of Wang Yang, not knowing where to go, even if he makes a mistake. When children interact with other peers, they will put their position in the highest place everywhere, and they are aggressive and often attack.
Second, the case study process
(A) investigation, find out the status quo of family education.
Through home visits, we investigated the family education that children received at home. Research and analysis show that the reasons for family education of problem children are: incomplete family structure makes the environment in which children grow up congenital, lack of adequate maternal love is the main inducement for children to have aggressive behavior, and laissez-faire education is the main reason. The mother didn't give the child enough warmth and neglected the communication and exchange with the child. As a result of letting it develop naturally, children have developed the character of willfulness, stubbornness, arrogance, unreasonable troubles, love to play with temper, make trouble and attack their peers. Grandma only raises her children but doesn't teach them. She tolerates their children's bad behavior, occasionally beats and scolds them, making trouble without reason and being helpless.
(2) Explore the main measures and methods to solve the family education environment.
1, access to relevant information to understand the misunderstanding and psychological characteristics of children's education in laissez-faire families.
Parental identity in laissez-faire families? Is the essence of a tree straight? Take an indifferent concept, a laissez-faire parenting attitude and educational methods to children, and ignore their inner world and needs. Children living in this neglected family will gradually develop apathy, aggression and emotional anxiety.
2. Explore practice and provide effective guidance and services for parents.
The first stage:
We had in-depth communication with the children's mother and current father (hereinafter referred to as parents) through home visits, telephone calls and individual exchanges. We let them know about some cases of laissez-faire family tutoring and the consequences of laissez-faire education for children. We also helped them analyze the relationship between some existing problem behaviors and psychological characteristics of children and the misunderstanding and environment in family education. We guide parents to pay attention to their children's education in a more indirect way and are willing to change the existing concept of family education.
The second stage:
At our suggestion, parents try to make up for the lack of family education from the following aspects:
(1) Increase opportunities to meet children and enhance emotional communication with children.
(2) Adhere to positive guidance and education, and adopt the educational method of encouraging praise.
(3) Flexible use of educational methods and strategies according to children's characteristics.
(4) Consultation within the family to enhance the coordination of family education.
(5) Cooperate with kindergarten education and keep the consistency of education.
The third stage:
We have established specific and detailed personal growth files for our children, and have written communication with their parents every month. Including the children's recent development at home and in the garden, the educational experience of parents and teachers, the success of education and the lack of education.
We often communicate with our children's grandmothers by chatting and do a good job in counseling. We respect grandma's opinions, and at the same time help her analyze the advantages and disadvantages of different educational methods, help her build up confidence in educating children, establish correct educational concepts, and gradually master some methods and strategies for educating children.
We also often use our time to get close to the children and have a cordial conversation with them. This can make children feel the teacher's care, make up for the lack of maternal love, and is more conducive to the teacher's education and guidance for children, so that children can develop in a positive direction.
The rise of juvenile delinquency has become a worldwide problem, and the high incidence of juvenile delinquency in China can not be ignored. Investigate its reason, family problems can be said to be its fatal external cause. In recent years, the divorce rate in China has soared. Incomplete family structure and improper educational methods affect children's healthy growth. And early childhood education is the basic stage of prevention.
? Let go of our family education, we can't discipline or let go of our children, making them lose family warmth, causing their children to be withdrawn and indifferent, causing aggressive behavior to their peers and causing hidden dangers of minor injuries. Therefore, it is hoped that through the research of this topic, parents can educate their children in a reasonable way and eliminate the inducing factors and conditions of children's injury accidents and even crimes due to aggressive behavior in the family environment.
(3) Summarize the main results of the case study.
1, the direct object of guidance? Changes in parents
Through one year's guidance, parents' ideas, attitudes, behaviors and ways have changed greatly, and their counseling ability and quality have improved obviously.
(1) Parents have gradually established a correct concept of education, and the parenting style is becoming more and more democratic. They can attach importance to their children's psychological needs and fully communicate with them, thus maintaining an equal parent-child relationship. Mentor and friend? .
(2) Parents' own quality has improved significantly. From the beginning of receiving guidance, parents realize that role models have a great influence on their children, so they can change bad habits for their children. Tutoring activities give parents the motivation to tutor. Parents are willing to strengthen contact and communication with their children. They can actively explore the knowledge of family education and unconsciously change their parenting attitudes and behaviors.
2, the indirect object of guidance? Children's changes
After a year of family cooperative education, children's aggressive behavior was basically put an end to. Nowadays, children have become sensible, polite in words and deeds, able to get along well with children and adapt to collective life.
3. The instructor himself? The change of teachers
The quality and ability of teachers have been improved. Teachers often use their spare time to study, actively carry out guidance activities and explore experiences in practice. Now teachers can cope with counseling activities freely, and their expression ability, communication ability, adaptability, design ability and writing ability have all been improved.
Three. The conclusion of the case study
1. It is feasible and effective to improve parents' parenting style and eliminate children's aggressive behavior in the family environment. Over the past year, with the joint efforts of my hometown, the aggressive behavior of the subjects has been gradually controlled and basically eliminated.
2. Children's good behavior habits are not developed overnight. Relaxation in education often leads to repeated phenomena, which need to be strengthened and consolidated for a period of time. Therefore, teachers and parents should insist on Qi Xin's concerted efforts to turn children's aggressive behavior into prosocial behavior.
3. Eliminating the injury accidents caused by children's aggressive behavior, even the inducing factors and conditions of crimes in the family environment, will also contribute to the harmonious development of society.
Case analysis of children's family education II
If someone asks:? When is the most attractive stage for young children? The expert must say without thinking:? Four years old? . But for the average adult, this age is the biggest headache for them. Compared with 3 or 5 years old, 4-year-old children are the least docile; Because they are in the so-called? An energetic age? All aspects of the body are developing vigorously.
Parents with 4-year-old children at home are sometimes annoyed by their children and even discouraged from paying attention to them. I deeply realized that parenting is really not easy. But from another perspective, parents must also go through this stage.
4-year-old children are full of energy, but not as rebellious as adults think. On the contrary, they like to be in close contact with social life. Just arrogant, confident and independent, making people think they like to resist.
In addition, at the age of 4, he likes to try everything, whether it is a hammer, scissors, swing or tricycle, he can play or use it freely. For example, he is often seen wearing gorgeous clothes to imitate the stars on TV, or playing family wine with his companions.
During this period, they grew very fast. If they stop for a while and look at something with serious eyes, they will definitely find something novel, and then they will chase and ask: What is this? Why ... why? Mom. ? For 4-year-old children, things in this world are mostly unfamiliar to them. In order to find out, they will take great pains to investigate. Adults are often overwhelmed by the spirit of pursuing children.
At the same time, 4-year-old children are generous and love to brag. If we talk about their interesting topics, we often make adults sigh. In short, 4-year-old children have overall personality contraction.
Shadows will be imperceptible in the future.
The deviation and confusion caused by rapid growth generally appear in 4-year-old children. I hope that adults will face these problems with tolerance.
Children at this stage, family education must pay attention to the following points:
1, don't be bored
First of all, parents should accept the phenomenon that children are talkative at this stage.
The development of language must go through? Listening and speaking? The stage can be completed, so adults should establish a correct mode of speaking for their children, and at the same time be loyal listeners to their children.
In particular, don't restrain children's desire to speak, parents should pay attention to their children's words, and please create more pleasant atmosphere; Like what? Trouble! ? Shut up! ? The attitude of forbidding children to talk is the last thing to do.
If there is a guest at home, and adults are worried that it will affect the conversation, you can tell him first: I will listen to you later, so that he can get into the habit of waiting. The above statement does not mean that parents should always be with their children. It is enough to be patient with him for thirty or forty minutes every day. The rest of the time, mothers can answer while working. I see! ? And pay attention to his eyes and let him know that you have everything he says.
Although this is only a simple reaction, it has already satisfied the children.
In addition, it is also a good way for dad to accompany the children when mom is busy eating. At this time, the father might as well tell the children about the interesting things outside, which can better satisfy the children's curiosity and enhance the feelings between father and son.
2. Internal and external differences
A 4-year-old who talks too much doesn't talk as much outside as at home. Especially in the face of unfamiliar environment, this tendency is more obvious. At this time, adults may immediately say impatiently: Isn't home very good? What's going on now?
This phenomenon is not so much a language problem of children themselves as a social problem. As long as they are used to different people and environments, they can naturally overcome this obstacle slowly.
3, don't care about the child's rude words
Once the social life of 4-year-old children and their peers is smooth, rude words or unacceptable words often blurt out. At this time, adults should not care too much; If we forbid them to swear because of socializing, it is tantamount to prohibiting their lives and thus interfering with their communication.
When the 4-year-old son swears for the first time, his parents might as well say to him: This sentence is not nice, you shouldn't say it! ? Then teach him the correct statement; If you hear his swearing words again, you will be deliberately silent, making him feel that such words can't communicate with adults, and naturally change; If adults make a fuss about it, it will be counterproductive.
In short, children are constantly learning new words. As long as the family uses the correct language method, the novelty of swearing will easily disappear, and adults don't have to care too much.
1, transition period and completion period
A 4-year-old child is physically and mentally independent and has flexible hands and feet. Adults can see growth and progress from his living habits. This period is called. Completion period? 4-year-old children are often overconfident and difficult to deal with, but they are keen to try things. As long as parents give careful guidance, they can cultivate their independence.
4-year-old children, whether they are in kindergarten or not, should give priority to their own affairs.
1, diet
I can eat with chopsticks correctly after I was 5 years old. Although a 4-year-old child is not good at holding chopsticks, you should let him use chopsticks often to gradually learn the correct method.
4-year-old children have a strong appetite, but when they are excited, tired, overexertion, lack of sleep and irregular life, they will lose their appetite. At this time, don't force the child to eat as much as he wants. It doesn't matter if he doesn't want to eat.
4-year-old children usually eat with their families, but sometimes they don't eat because they are too keen to talk or quarrel with their brothers and sisters; In this case, parents had better leave him alone and don't let him get into the habit of eating and playing. ? Can you eat faster? I don't know what the dessert will be later. Can you take the vinegar bottle to mom? Giving children a little stimulation like this is also one of the ways to prevent inattention. If you haven't finished eating a meal for thirty or forty minutes, put it away; Afterwards, if the child is hungry again, he can only show sympathy and stop giving food. Only in this way can he form the habit of eating regularly, but snacks should still be served as usual.
Step 2 excrete
At the age of four, the habit of excretion will gradually develop. At the age of four and a half, he can wipe his ass with toilet paper instead of taking a shit in his pants because he is keen on games. If the child goes to the toilet in the middle of the night, parents should help.
In addition, when children reach the age of 4, they will gradually feel shy about going to the toilet. At this time, parents can seize the opportunity to teach him, and should not say it in front of others? I have to pee? I want to shit? If it is not elegant.
Step 3: Take off your clothes.
At this stage, children will show high interest in undressing, but they will lose their temper if they don't undress well. At this time, parents can teach them the order of dressing, the difference between shirts and sweaters, the order of buttoning, and the method of cleaning up the changed clothes. If he had formed this habit from the beginning, he could have handled the problem of changing clothes by himself at the age of 4. In addition, if the button is not too small, let him form the habit of buttoning himself.
4-year-old children are very willing to learn to wear socks, gloves, hats and shoes. Generally speaking, children can tell the left and right of shoes before they are 5 years old.
Attracted by other things, no longer wearing clothes, this is the characteristic of 4-year-old children. Don't blame him at this time, remind him in a humorous tone and let him find out for himself. Another thing to remind is to teach children not to run naked in front of people.
Step 4: Clean
Although it is easy to get dirty, cleanliness is also one of the characteristics of 4-year-olds. At this stage, things like gargling, brushing your teeth, washing your face, wiping your nose and combing your hair can be done well. Even children who don't like cleanliness before the age of 3 are sensitive to dirty things at this time. Parents, please don't swear when your child accidentally stains his clothes. It's too dirty! ? Just instruct him to wash his hands thoroughly before meals or before meals.
Ordinary families can arrange for their children to take a bath before dinner and let them engage in other activities after dinner. When taking a bath, teach your child to clean every part. If he is allowed to wash himself, he will probably only wash in a fixed place.
Step 5 sleep
Generally speaking, sleep is about 1 1 hour, but there are great personal differences and there are no hard and fast rules. Some children have the habit of taking a nap, while others don't. Even if they are forced to go to bed, they will play in bed or sneak out to play when their parents are not paying attention.
Forcing children to take a nap is easy for children to have resistance; There is no need to force the child to sleep unless he is particularly tired.
In addition, children and adults with a sense of darkness had better leave a small light before he goes to sleep, or adults can read him a story and watch him fall asleep. Some children are easily awakened by nightmares, so parents' bedrooms should not be too far away from their children's rooms.
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