Learning content 1 NLP and introduction to psychology, 2 mental strategies, 3 life scripts and 4 boundaries.

My harvest

1. Psychology is everywhere, and there is psychology where there are people. The NLP psychological practice we study is more about physical and mental operation, with practice as the main part and oral English as the supplement.

2. What we deal with is the relationship between people, which is called mental strategy in NLP.

There is no difference between good and bad strategies, because strategies are used in our lives, but why strategies are ineffective is usually because they are too single and self-centered. There is no way to communicate with other people's strategies, and it is difficult to win their understanding. There are two strategies: one is the environment variable strategy, and the other is the action variable strategy. Environment variable strategy is to look outward with eyes, and action variable strategy is to look inward with eyes. One is passive and the other is active.

3. Our initial life script comes from the growing environment in family of origin, and we can't help imitating our parents' interpersonal patterns. But when we realize that we are the director of our own life script, we don't have to deny the past, but to extract what is beneficial to us, add our new expectations, and rewrite the rest of our lives.

The worst situation of interpersonal relationship is unclear boundaries. A person's mature and complete separation performance depends on whether he can establish a clear boundary for himself, find his own position and defend his own boundary. Boundary is a psychological strategy, which should be flexible and elastic. We should not only know how to respect our own borders, but also know how to respect others' borders.

No. 12. 18 punched in the next day.

Learning content 5. Three things in life. Drama triangle

My harvest

1. What are the three things in life: my business, others' business and God's business; Past, present and future ... Why is our life always a mess, full of contradictions, confusion, entanglement and confusion? Come to think of it, have we not divided things clearly? Worry about other people's affairs but don't pay attention to your own affairs, ignore your own feelings, and blame your failure on others' attitude towards you; Depressed yesterday's unhappiness missed the positive possibility now ... when we realized the importance of three things, we also fully understood the meaning of the sense of boundaries.

2. Life is like a play, it all depends on acting! I am both the director and the star of my own life script. What kind of life you want is your choice!

Below: victim triangle

Above: Principal Triangle

We tend to cycle in the victim triangle:

When you are the victim, you will project the injurer and rescuer in your life;

In self-relationship, I can play three roles and get myself into a vicious circle of self-denial and self-redemption.

The responsibility triangle is a more effective strategy;

No matter what kind of relationship troubles you face, you should be responsible for your own life and become the one who creates new actions in the relationship.

Constantly aware of their victim strategy, they partially become responsible.

About responsibility: the responsibility lies not in who is wrong and who should be punished, but in who can stand up and make things better when things happen.

Punch in on the third day 12. 19.

Learning content 8.9. Restrictive belief

My harvest

1. What is faith?

I think what people, things and things should look like is a series of your views on what things should look like.

Everyone can't live outside the world of faith.

Faith can be found and broken.

2. Ways to form beliefs

According to the past experience for processing and storage.

3. deep-rooted beliefs

Helpless: no help.

Hopeless: I have no hope.

Unqualified: I am worthless.

These three restrictive beliefs come from the early growth experience, which makes us lose the inner strength and creativity of adults.

4. How to break through restrictive beliefs and introduce positive beliefs?

(1) Break through the restrictive belief in one sentence

Nobody loves me VS I deserve to be loved.

(2) Plant positive beliefs.

I'm qualified ...

I have this ability. ...

My father allowed me to do so. ...

My mother allows me to do this. ...

(3) screenwriter (rewriting the story)

-Tell a story

-Adapting stories from the perspective of resources/from the perspective of love

-The new belief is

Punch in the number 12.2 1 on the fifth day.

Learning content 12. 13. Experience element 14. 15 iceberg.

My harvest

1. Three experience elements:

Visual elements, auditory elements and sensory elements.

Vision, hearing and feeling are channels for processing experience elements and storing information in the subconscious mind.

Experience elements will become your eyes to see the world, and the more negative experience elements, the more negative experience you have to the world.

2. How to use experience elements?

Deal with negative or invalid experiences stored in the subconscious.

Leverage, life is more effective.

Support consciousness is more strategic.

iceberg

Facts are not equal to the truth.

Repetition at the behavioral level is often a conflict of views.

The problem itself is not a problem, but how to look at it.

To expect others is to give others the key to your life.

When consulting, we don't go to work with problems, but with the expectations, wishes and even life energy of the parties.

1. conversion

(1) sensory transformation

(2) the change of viewpoint

2. About the level of feelings

(1) proprioception (body sensation)

(2) Surface emotional feelings (anger, tension, fear ...)

(3) Inner feelings (grievance, sadness, pain ...)

Look forward to it

(1) My expectations of others

(2) My expectations of myself

(3) What others expect of me

NLP psychological practice 10: NLP 12 presupposition

Look at people

1. No two people are alike.

2. One person can't change another.

3. The effect of communication depends on the reaction of the other party.

Everyone chooses the behavior that gives him the best interest.

Everyone has the resources to make himself successful and happy.

6. Motives and emotions can never be wrong, but actions have no effect.

See things.

7. Repeating old practices will only lead to old results.

8. There are at least three solutions to everything.

9. Only the world shaped by sensory experience has no absolute real world.

10. No frustration, only response information.

1 1. Effective is more important than reasonable.

12. The most flexible part of the system can affect the whole situation most.

Punch in on the seventh day 12.23.

Learning content 20.2 1 CET-6 comprehension

My harvest

1. What are the six levels of understanding?

Six floors from top to bottom:

-Spirit/system (my relationship with the world)

-Identity (who am I)

-Beliefs and values (why)

-Ability (how)

-Behavior (doing what)

-Environment (time, place, people, things, things)

Understanding level: the upper level always manages the lower level, and the lower level is guided by the deeper headquarters (the upper level).

2. Identity and role

Identity location: Switch between different systems to achieve more effective identity location.

The core of identity is personality charm and self-worth.

People have different meanings and missions in different systems.

3. Comprehension level exercises

(1) Identify a system in your life.

(2) Sort out whether your identity is valid in this system.

(3) What is the valid identity you need to adjust? How to adjust?

4. Comprehension level interview

Consultants and visitors:

(1) The visitor tells about his confusion in a relationship.

(2) the consultant asked:

-Who are you in this case? What do you look like from the other side?

-In fact, what should be a valid identity? Compare an invalid identity with a valid identity to see the difference.

5. Comprehension level response exercises

I saw you ... (environment, behavior)

I feel you ... (ability, the value you care about, what kind of person you are)

You can take us to ...

6. Use the understanding level of "follow first and then take"

(1) is as follows: There are four levels of cognition (system, identity, belief value and ability).

(2) It brings about changes in the following two levels (behavior and environment).

7. Summary

Understanding levels can help us better understand ourselves and others.

Knowing the level identification and systematic affirmation can increase a person's inner strength.

Criticism is in the lower two levels, and support for the middle two levels must be in the upper two levels.

Counselors know themselves better than visitors.

Punch in on the eighth day 12.24.

Learning Content 22.23.24 Spiritual Space (Upper, Middle and Lower Levels)

My harvest

1. What is "spiritual space"?

-Spiritual space is different from physical space.

-Spiritual space is the part of the iceberg below sea level.

Thinking space diagram

(1) Core spiritual space: Mom and Dad and I-I came to this world through my parents.

(2) Macro spiritual space: the soil on which everyone lives, that is, the environment and times around us.

-to do a case, we should consider the background of the parties.

All faiths (except cults) must support and educate all people to find happiness and love.

-The family planning policy has profoundly affected everyone's inner self.

Compared with national memorabilia, the most direct influence on us is a person's life memorabilia.

Mastering the function and significance of mental space map can support us to explore more accurately and find out where the emotional card points of the parties are.

2. Life coordinates

All the confusion comes from you, not yourself.

What we want to discuss is, if we are not ourselves, who are we?

I am with my parents, partners and children.

We do sports to let our bodies know, not just our brains.

-Parents use the problems between two people to call their children home, and children may also call their parents to make up through their own symptoms.

-where is the heart in the same place?

3. Summary

(1) Three maps that psychological counselors need to master: iceberg map, cognitive hierarchy map and mental space map.

(2) For children, complete love means that children can receive their parents' love for TA and see the love between their parents.

(3) Love and nourishment in relationships are the driving force of our lives.

(4) Treating a person is to awaken the power of love and being loved in the relationship.

(5) Psychotherapy is to find the source of love of the client, and to find the part of love in all problems and puzzles, rather than solving problems.

12.

clock

Learning Content 24.25 Psychological Iron Triangle of Relationship with Parents

My harvest

1. Why is it a psychological iron triangle?

(1) The first relationship in life is with parents.

-The first man I met was dad.

-The first woman I met was my mother.

(2) The relationship with mom and dad is the prototype of our future interpersonal relationship.

(3) From the psychological, biological and genetic perspectives, they are all iron triangles.

2. Overview of psychological iron triangle

(1) Half the strength in life comes from dad: masculinity and fighting; Half of the energy comes from the mother: tolerance, gentleness and responsibility.

(2) Feminine energy is the energy that can be most connected with people.

(3) As a woman, the primary solution is female energy; As a man, the first thing to look at is the relationship with his father.

(4) Dealing with the relationship with parents is not really about reconciliation with parents, but about enabling us to love the people around us and the world better.

(5) The life system has only one purpose, that is, the next generation will live better than the previous generation.

(6) Unwilling to be close to others may be a personality characteristic or a parent's.

Everything we do for our parents is based on my desire to live better in the future with this life.

(8) In fact, the more children parents have, the stronger their ability to produce love.

(9) When several children are together, parents should participate less, and even if they participate, they should judge who is right and who is wrong, who is good and who is not; At the same time, create more opportunities for "psychological iron triangle".

(10) When we associate with people now, we are actually connecting with others through self-relationship and self-form.

(1 1) How you isolate yourself, you will isolate others in interpersonal relationships.

No. 12.26, punch in on day 10.

Learning content 26.27 Accept the parent-parent relationship law.

My harvest

1. Steps to Accept Parental Law

(1) preparation and connection

(2) Status quo, feelings and expressions

(3) Introduction of leading words

(4) Get love and strength and face the future.

Note: if you accept the parental law, you must establish contact with your biological parents, who are the root and the only one. If you want to establish contact with adoptive parents, you need to adjust the guidance language.

2. Summary of main points

(1) We can't change our parents, but we can change our cognition of them.

(2) loving parents is not to support parents to change their lives, but to make children live more powerfully and do more good deeds.

(3) As a parent, when you are really strong, you will have very good support for your children.

(4) As a consultant, you should adjust yourself to the frequency consistent with the customer, or to a relatively consistent rhythm.

(5) Consulting is not that I want to help you, but that I give you a space for self-help, that is, to help others help themselves.

No. 12.27+0 1 day.

Learning content 28.29.30 Relationship with oneself

My harvest

1. Confidence and value

(1) Self-confidence is the feeling that we describe a state brought by our sense of self-worth in our daily life.

(2) Ways to gain a sense of value: create more opportunities-do more things-and be affirmed for doing more things.

(3) A healthy sense of self-worth was affirmed 500 times before 18 years old.

2. Accept your own laws

(1) Practice steps:

-Breathe and relax, and communicate with the subconscious.

-Imagine "a growing self" and see and feel each other's expression, posture and state.

Dialogue with "Growing Self": When I grow up, I am you, you are myself, I see you, and now it is time for us to be together, so that we can accept ourselves, love ourselves more and make more contributions.

-Embrace the "growing self", say something that only the two of you know, and imagine that the "growing self" becomes an energy and is completely integrated with yourself.

-Break the state, effect test

(2) Function

The integration of accepting self-discipline is a part of internal self-relationship, which helps to improve self-worth and is a core and important part of psychological counseling practice.

Function: increase self-confidence and inner strength, and cope with the trauma of growth.

(3) Precautions

-first, it is based on communication with the subconscious.

-looking for positive significance and resources.

-only talk about feelings, not big talk.

Root: I'm sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. I love you.

(4) Summary

-guide visitors not to convince TA, but to let TA see the essence behind the surface.

-When others are doing exercises, bystanders should not follow. All the dialogues and scenes are tailor-made for the parties. If you follow them, the subconscious will make you doze off, sleepy and unacceptable.

All my relations with the outside world are rooted in self-relationship, and the root of self-relationship is the four-letter word: I'm sorry, please forgive me, thank you, I love you.

-A person who can understand himself can understand the world better.

No. 12.28, punch in on day 12.

Learning Content 3 1.32.33 Communication Elements and Skills

My harvest

1. Introduction to Communication

(1) Narrow AC and Wide AC

In a narrow sense, communication means that I communicate with someone and two people talk.

Communication in a broad sense is our relationship with the world.

(2) the direction of communication: look outward and look inward.

(3) the goal of communication

-Intimate relationship: communication is aimed at affinity.

-In the workplace: communication aims to create.

2. Communication elements

(1) Limb (physical and mental): 55%

(2) Intonation (physical and mental energy): 38%

(3) Words (rationality): 7%

3. Communication skills

(1) It is tone and body language, not words, that determine the communication effect.

(2) Speaking is to increase the inner strength of both sides, not to reduce it.

(3) Repeat the old practices and get the old results.

(4) Communication needs to be checked (questioning): questioning is a more important tool than presentation.

(5) Flexibility and win-win (Hello, I am good, the world is good)

No. 12.29, punch in on day 13.

34.35.36 Learning content of communication basic training

My harvest

1. Basic communication training

(1) Listen (listen to each other's needs)

Retelling the other side needs to pay attention to the following two aspects at the same time:

-Language

-Body+Tone

(2) Streamline your speech

Simplify the main points+check (let visitors understand and be seen)

2. The basic training of communication "accept criticism"

Accepting criticism is an effective way to improve the negative emotions left after accepting criticism, that is, to install a program for yourself, so that you have the strength to deal with it and even turn negative information into positive information.

Steps:

(1) Imagine going back to the past and being criticized.

(2) Play back the process of criticism and put a trash can beside you.

(3) Play back the process of criticism, separate it, leave the meaningful ones, and put the meaningless ones in the trash can.

(4) Have some simple conversations with each other.

(5) break the state.

3. The "two-in-one method" of basic communication training

The split method is used to deal with situations where you can't accept people.

Steps:

(1) Imagine the other person standing in front of you, find the initial feeling, put this person on the big screen and split the screen in two.

(2) Make a copy, and then talk to TA: You are not perfect, and I am not perfect. I only interact with those parts that you support, and let go of what I can't accept. Then move over, close the acceptable distance and push away the unacceptable.

(3) Have a simple conversation with TA: I will cooperate with you better in the future to make our relationship win-win.

No. 12.30, punch in on day 14.

Learning content 37. Introduction to Emotion 38 EQ

My harvest

1. Introduction to emotions

(1) What is emotion?

-Instinct

-Energy

-Ability

(2) It's not that I don't need emotions, but I don't know how to transform my negative experience.

(3) What we need is how to train emotional instinct and energy into the ability to make us more successful and happier in life.

2. Emotional intelligence

EQ, literally, is how to treat emotions as a kind of ability in life, that is, EQ, that is, a person can make rational use of TA's emotions and treat TA's emotions as a kind of ability and tool to make his life more effective.

Emotional intelligence is divided into four abilities:

(1) perception

(2) Understanding

(3) Apply pressure

(4) the power of comfort

No. 12.3 1 punched in on the fifth day of/kloc-0.

Learning content 39. The meaning of emotion. Life emotion and survival emotion

My harvest

1. The meaning/function of emotion

(1) expression

(2) Connection

(3) Growth

The deepest meaning of emotion is to let us express ourselves, connect with others, let ourselves grow up and be more mature psychologically.

2. Life emotion and survival emotion

(1) Two basic emotions at the core of survival emotion

angry

frightened

(2) Life emotion

-Love

-Grateful

-Happy.

The number 1. 1 clocked in on the fifth day/kloc-0.

Learning content 4 1. The positive significance of negative emotions 42. Techniques for relieving emotions

My harvest

1. The positive significance of negative emotions

(1) Anger: strength, love

(2) Fear: face, strength

(3) Pain: growth and maturity

(4) jealousy: growth and appreciation

(5) Anxiety: attention and methods

(6) grievance: expression and growth

(7) sadness: cherish

(8) Disappointment: Don't control it

Exercise:

I don't want (dislike) a.

Rewrite:

I need an a.

-Because A can remind me ... help me. ...

-I want to use it. ...

Step 2: Calm your emotions.

(1) EQ

-Release your emotions

-Express your feelings

-Transform emotions

-Use your emotions

(2) Exercise relieves emotions

Breathe and relax.

2) Body energy

-Mixed method: more concentrated.

-Physiological balance method: calming emotions

No. 1.2, punch in on day 17.

Learning content 42. Safety technology 43. Express and transform emotions

My harvest

1. security technology

-Breathe and relax, connect with the subconscious, imagine seeing that emotion and visualize it.

-Create a safe place where we can see emotions or uncomfortable places. If you can't put it in, do one more positive step and keep it in mind. Say to the emotion: I know that you are meaningful to my growth, although I am not clear about it yet. Put you in the safe first, and then come back to grow up when the time is right. Thank you!

-Push the safe to the left rear (left-handed is right rear), and the corner of the eye can be seen.

-Break the state, effect test.

2. Express and transform emotions

Emotional onion is actually a process of consciousness evolution. When we live in the outermost layer of emotional onion, we are actually living in a relatively instinctive and barbaric state.

-Surface emotions: anger, anxiety and fear.

-Deep emotions: pain, grievance and sadness.

-the deepest: love and be loved.

No. 1.3, punch in on day 18.

Learning content 44. Intelligent handling of emotions. Contraction projection method

My harvest

1. Intelligent handling of emotions

Steps to deal with emotions wisely:

(1) Pay attention to people and things that produce emotions.

(2) Acceptance+Understanding+Emotion

(3) Emotional onion+positive significance

(4) Planning new strategies for the future

2. About projection

(1) Counselors can use projection to stay in the present and remain neutral, and at the same time use the projection of the parties to give corresponding support.

(2) Projection is not the problem, but the projection that affects one's relationship and life, and falling into projection without awareness is the problem.

3. Shrinkage projection method

Steps:

(1) Test the distance between the two sides.

(2) Dialogue with the other party:

Dear A, maybe I have some expectations for you. It's about B. Now, I take back those expectations of B and give them back to B. In this way, you are just my A and I am just your C.

(3) Imagine that he is behind him, flying some requirements from the projected opponent back to B behind him.

(4) After all of them fly back, observe the differences between each other and before.

(5) Break the state and test the effect.

No. 1.4 punched in on 19.

Learning content 47. Perceptual position balance method 48. Flexible application of perceptual position balance

My harvest

1. Flexible application of perceptual position balance: perceptual position transformation.

(1) Invite the parties to tell a disturbing event.

(2) If you were the other person, how would you feel? What do you think of this matter?

(3) If you were an important person, what would you think of you and this matter? What kind of advice would you give to each other and yourself?

(4) If you are the future, what do you think of it in ten years? What do you think of you in this incident?

(5) If you were a coach, what would you think of this event? Look at you at this time? What advice would you give yourself?

(6) If you could handle this matter easily, what would you do?

No.65438 +0.5 Punch on the 20th day.

Learning content 49. Explore yourself with perceptual position balance 50. Dealing with emotional imbalances and entanglements.

My harvest

1. Explore yourself with a perceived positional balance: a dialogue between the future and the goal.

(1) Imagine what you will be like in five years.

(2) If all the goals are achieved, what kind of picture will it be? Who's in the picture?

(3) What do you have to say to yourself?

(4) Invite the parties to completely input their own pictures in the future.

(5) Turn around and look at yourself just now. How do you feel? Is there anything you want to say to TA?

(6) How do you feel when you return to your original position and look at yourself who has become the future? What would you say to yourself and TA?

(7) Imagination and future embrace

2. 1. Dealing with emotional imbalance

Practice steps:

(1) fee

-Love, memory

-Support growth

-The other side's efforts

(2) Salary

-Support each other

-Damage to the other party

(3) Let go: the other person's life/burden

Note: The steps of the exercise can be adjusted according to the different conditions of medical treatment.

-For angry/powerful visitors, you can do the step of "giving" first.

-For visitors with the victim mentality, you can do the "reception" step first.

Solve the entanglement

Practice steps:

(1) Balance emotions

(2) Blessing+Goodbye

(3) Connect yourself in the future

No. 1.6, punch in on the 2nd1day.

Learning content 51:psychological counseling from the perspective of NLP psychological practice

My harvest

1. Psychological consultation steps

(1) initial diagnosis: determine the subject, objectives, collect data, design the consultation framework, and determine the time schedule.

(2) Dimension interpretation

(3) frequency statistics

(4) Finish what you started.

2. Source of effect

State score, the visitor points out to see himself, and the counselor supplements the personality of the visitor.

3. Consultation-visit relationship

(1) Pay attention to projection, and use exposure (escape) in case of conflict with visitors.

(2) If it is difficult to support visitors, you can introduce them to another consultant to help them.