I am a cry baby, and it is easy to cry because I am moved and sad. My college roommate and I are also sensitive and hit it off in tears (coincidence).
Our crying baby has a soft voice, delicate feelings and surprisingly rich inner world; If I feel uncomfortable and stressed, I will cry when I am concerned and moved. Crying is like our instinct. Tears seem to wash the soul and dirt. Just cry and you'll be fine. You can't even cry when you push too hard. I'm like a choking fish. I struggled to breathe. I was humble.
In junior high school and senior high school, when I was bored because of the pressure of exams, I would find some novels that abused my heart to read: ten years' taste was as warm as words, and to the sky kingdom was as heavy as frost, all of which accompanied me to cry before going to bed. It is common to cry because of music now. I love to listen to these daily songs that make people cry-Sunshine Rainbow Little White Horse, Flowers Bloom, Bird's Nest and Answers to Everything.
Of course, crying comes at a price. I often ask myself if I am too weak, too fragile, easy to cry and naive. Sometimes I don't want to cry in public, but my tears can't help but stay spontaneously, which is a bit embarrassing. Someone has asked me countless times why I cry so easily-I also want to know wow, I was born perfect.
This time, simply write about crying systematically to clear the name of crying.
Do you really know how to cry?
Crying is also called emotional crying. Tears flow from the lacrimal gland, and crying because of the situation and mood state is crying. It is completely different from the physical stimulation to the eyes, such as crying.
Crying is a unique skill of human beings. The baby's first cry helps him to open his breath. Bowlby, a developmental psychologist, pointed out that the crying behavior of babies is an emotional connection with their parents-they need their parents to be around and seek care and care.
When children grow up, there are more reasons to cry. Why adults cry reveals who we are and what we care about. We will cry because of helplessness, loss, breakup, sadness, pain, injustice, self-blame, unwillingness, injustice, anger and fear, and also cry because of touching, reunion, sympathy, love and excitement. Sad movies and sad music are the introduction of tears. A person crying silently, or crying in front of people who care about themselves, is also different from crying in public.
The following table shows the "crying occasions" listed by psychologists, with negative situations on the left and positive situations on the right:
Some people cry easily and may be born to cry. Is it true?/You don't say. /You don't say. The study found that gender and personality are personal differences that affect crying. Girls cry much more than boys. If men cry, they usually cry with joy. Regardless of gender differences, people with high sympathy index are more likely to cry in terms of personality. Therefore, crying is really related to nature.
At the funeral, you and I always hear the expression of comfort-"crying too much hurts your health, and I am sorry for your loss." This statement focuses on crying, so how scientific is it?
In fact, it is a complicated question whether crying is harmful to health or health preservation.
Psychological counselors have basically reached a consensus on this point. Psychologists from different schools and learning backgrounds all agree that crying during counseling is constructive.
However, scholars have different views. They think that crying is different and cannot be generalized.
Professor Allen vogel of the University of Utah believes that crying can be divided into positive crying and wrong crying, and only positive crying is beneficial to people. Active crying is the fusion of physical feelings and subjective emotional feelings. And "the wrong way of crying actually suppresses the perception of physical feelings, and crying masks feelings or leads them to other places."
Tadashi Sawada, a professor from Japan, and his colleagues emphasized the benefits of crying alone. They think that crying alone is more beneficial to the soul than crying in front of others. Because a person crying can avoid other people's judgment on crying.
If we sort out the academic scholars' discussion on the cry function, we will find four viewpoints:
1. Crying has catharsis function;
2. Tears make people more willing to ask for help and give others the motivation to care about you;
3. Tears promote the unity of the group, and collective crying has evolutionary significance;
Crying can comfort yourself, which is beneficial to mood and health.
Among them, points 2 and 4 are being explored by psychologists in experiments.
Leo newhouse, a senior social worker, wrote in the Harvard Health Blog, "Crying has been found to increase emotional connection and enhance intimacy, sympathy and support between friends and family.
An international survey collecting data from 37 countries found that 70% people think crying makes them feel better, and 50% people think their mood improves immediately after crying.
A more specific experiment was conducted by Dutch psychologist Gra at 20 15. Professor He of A Ning set up a control experiment: some people cried when watching sad movies, while others didn't cry; Then, after 20 minutes and 90 minutes, their emotional state was measured. Compared with people who didn't cry, people who cried were in a worse mood after 20 minutes. But magically, the person who cried after 90 minutes became better, even better than usual. Maybe this is the delayed effect of crying.
However, psychologists agree that the experiment of crying is far from enough and we still know little about the function of crying.
If you like crying like me, you may need the following crying guide.
This is a guide recommended by the psychological counselor:
As a kind of self-comfort, crying, keeping a diary and riding a roller coaster can relieve stress and trauma and provide some warm elasticity. If you find that life is surrounded by pain, loss and sadness, but you can't cry, you might as well watch a sad movie and let your tears flow naturally. It is a good choice to take a pack of paper towels and let the tears flow freely and unimpeded. Just remember to hydrate.
Quote:
1. Hesdorf, Washington, D.C., Winghertz, A. Trimble, M. R. (20 18). Social and psychological consequences of not crying: possible links with psychopathology and treatment. Central nervous system spectrum, 23(6), 414–422. /intl/blog/the-red-light-district/20 1508/the-effects-cryin
5./intl/blog/less-stress-more-peace/202 10 1/hacks-so-good-crying-stress-relief-and-healing
6./intl/blog/body-sense/20 10 10/are-all-crys-good-you
7./INTL/blog/He-Speaks-She-Speaks/20101/the-crying game