People's happiness comes from two sources, one is stimulation and the other is complete relaxation. Exciting happiness: if you take risks, have sex, etc. Stimulating happiness is often just the first time I feel happy. If I do those things repeatedly for a long time, I will feel bored. Smokers can get happiness by smoking one cigarette at a time at first, but later they have to smoke several cigarettes at a time to quit smoking. That's the truth. They can't feel the smell after smoking a cigarette. You see, psychology books began to work, but later they didn't. This is also the case. So if you want those psychological methods to be useful to you, you must use them again and again.
People usually get pleasure from stimulation. People often ignore the happiness brought by relaxation. It is not easy for some people to relax completely. If you want to use psychological methods to achieve the same effect every time, you should first relax yourself when using psychological methods. The thrill of stimulation is short-lived, while the thrill of relaxation is long-lasting.
When you look at my lines, are my eyebrows sharp or tight? Just relax。 . . . . . Are your shoulders and arms tight? . . . Just relax。 . . . Just relax。 . . . Say relax to your eyes. . . . Just relax。 . . . Say, look at my words below in 2 minutes.
The most difficult place for people to relax is the eyeball. Now say relax to your cerebral cortex. . .
Each of us needs a quiet room and a quiet center, just like the depths of the ocean will never be disturbed, no matter what storms and waves there are. The inner quiet room is built with imagination, as a decompression room for psychology and emotion, which can eliminate your tension, depression, depression and tension, make you refreshed, and return to your daily working environment after full preparation.
Each of us has a quiet center inside, undisturbed and never fluctuating. Just like the mathematical center of a wheel or bearing, it will remain stationary forever. What we need to do is to find this inner quiet point and go there regularly to rest and rejuvenate.
We should return to this quiet and comfortable center. Moreover, the best way to enter this center is to build a small psychological room for yourself in your imagination and decorate it with your most peaceful and fresh materials; Or beautiful scenery, or your favorite paintings; Or a poem you like. The color of the room is your favorite color. Choose peaceful blue, light green, yellow and golden yellow. The layout of the room should be concise and lively, without disorderly factors, and the layout of the room should be neat and clean. Simplicity, serenity and beauty are three key factors. There is your favorite easy chair in the room. From a small window, you can see the beautiful seaside. The waves are undulating and beating on the beach, but you can't hear the sound of the waves because your room is very quiet.
Build your room as carefully as possible in your imagination, just like building a room in an open space. Familiar with every detail.
During the day, you can always squeeze in some time and take the bus back to your quiet room to have a rest. When you start to feel nervous or uneasy, go back to a quiet room for a few minutes. In this way, you can spare a few minutes in a busy day to get great returns. This is not a waste of time, but an investment of time.
Then, imagine climbing the stairs and entering the room. Say to yourself, "I'm going upstairs now-now I open the door-I've entered the house." Pay attention to all the quiet and peaceful details in your imagination. Imagine you are sitting on your favorite bench, completely relaxed and uncontroversial. Your room is safe, nothing can touch you, and there is nothing to worry about, because you left them under the stairs. You don't have to make any decisions here. You don't have to worry or hurry.
After reading the above words, did you get a beautiful picture in your mind, and did you relax a lot? People are used to using the left brain, not the right brain. The function of the left brain is to calculate and understand language, and the function of the right brain is music, beautiful feelings, emotions and pictures.
You use your right brain to form a picture in your mind. Using the left brain often makes people feel tired, such as calculating and understanding, and it also makes people relax, so you can listen to music, read poems and read essays in your spare time, which will help you relax.
Why are you afraid to do something? Are you afraid of failure? This is not the root cause. What you are afraid of is that someone will talk after failure. Maybe it will be better if you read the following words.
Everyone has a weakness: the desire to become famous, which is human nature. People can't live longer, but they want their names to live forever. The desire to be famous makes people want to express themselves everywhere, to express themselves and to get the attention of others. Everyone thinks only of themselves. In people's conversation, we can often hear: how about me, how about my clothes, how about my children. And rarely talk about him, you. When people encounter something rare, they will remember it immediately so as to speak in front of others and attract their attention. Therefore, the purpose of others talking about you is only to make others notice him.
Remember, people are selfish. They only think of themselves and care about themselves. They don't care about others. So they will soon forget after talking, but you won't, because that's your business, you care, you only care about other people's opinions, but others will soon forget what you are afraid of, do what you want to do, and don't live in the shadow of others.
If you have good communication skills, when you encounter something, others will not talk about it, but help you, so improving your communication will help you overcome your psychological problems.
Everyone thinks for himself and wants to show himself and get the attention of others, so when others are showing, don't stop others from showing, so others will think they have your respect.
1, listen to others more and show yourself less. Some people like to be respected by others, others like to show themselves. If others succeed in front of you, they will feel respected. If you interrupt when others are talking and want to show yourself, then others will hate you. On the contrary, if you don't interrupt, sometimes give him a smile or add some comments to what he said (so that others will think that you are listening to him carefully), others will think that you are highly respected and treat you as a good friend.
Don't look around when communicating with others, so others will think that you are not interested in him and don't treat him as a friend. You should look at his face, not look around.
3. Smile at others. Smiling is a universal language all over the world. It can convey your warmth, and you often smile at others. People will think you are friendly.
4, to be able to appreciate others, I appreciate others at an appropriate time, others will be happy and willing to associate with you, but not too much, so it is suspected of criticizing horses.
5, care about other people's difficulties, others often say hello if they have any difficulties, others will think that they have got your attention and are willing to make you a friend.
6. Remember other people's names. If you are interacting with others for the first time, you must remember his name. You can call out his name for the second time, and others will think that he has been noticed by you.
Finally, let me tell you why you have such psychological problems while others don't. Because you are smart, smart people are often sensitive, and you will be sensitive to what others take for granted. Therefore, there are many psychological problems, which is why there are so many students jumping off buildings in Tsinghua Peking University, but few in other schools.
You are very clever. Without these psychological problems, you must be a successful person. If you want to have fewer psychological problems in the future, you must learn not to care. Don't care when you are sensitive. Leave it alone and it will disappear naturally.
I hope what I said is helpful to you. Friends feel that they can send messages to my Baidu number if they encounter any problems.
Finally, I repeat what I said before, using psychological methods to form habits and really solve psychological problems.