Illustration | Zhang Dongjian Park Hyung-sik's "Suit" stills

0 1、

It is a beautiful dream for an old man to have few wives. This dream is full of women's years of life and men's mature charm. It gives you pleasure in the most concentrated and direct way.

However, dreams always wake up. It will give you the sweetest dream and the most thorough awakening.

Recently, I received a consultation from a reader, Mr. Z. This middle-aged man in his 40 s has unspeakable depression and loneliness between his words.

He told me about his life and quarreled with his wife who was 15 years old. I sort out the scattered language expressions of readers as follows, and intuitively feel the troubles brought by the life of an elderly man with few wives.

First of all, it is difficult to coordinate schedules and living habits.

A big age gap will lead to differences in living habits and hobbies. After all, there is a saying called "three-year-old generation gap", not to mention in the era of rapid development.

Mr. Z has always had a good sleeping habit. He gets up at 6: 30 in the morning, goes to bed at 9: 30 in the evening and goes to sleep at 10: 00.

Since having a little wife, he has never successfully fallen asleep before 12: 00 at night. My wife likes to catch up with the drama and sleep late. If Mr. Z is sleepy, she will play the coquetry and let him accompany her. Even if she falls asleep in the company, she will wake him up.

In terms of diet, his wife doesn't like Chinese food, but Mr. Z likes home cooking. Mr. Z began to keep in good health two years ago, and he insisted on not touching many things. After having a little wife, I broke the rules many times.

The wife's ability to do housework is not good either, and Mr. Z has to bear almost all the big and small things in the family.

Second, the difference between physical strength and energy.

Every company will have an age limit for recruitment or extreme sports. This is not a discrimination, but an application that maximizes resources. After all, middle-aged people are really inferior to young people in physical strength and energy.

My wife likes climbing mountains, traveling and occasionally going to the playground. Mr. Z is unwilling to take part in these activities that consume physical strength and test blood pressure and heart.

His wife will also dislike his figure, let him run and exercise, and create a full set of body management plans. Mr. Z knows that these are good for his health, but he is tired. After exercise, he seems to have lost a layer of skin and suffered a lot.

Moreover, what annoys Mr. Z is that his wife actually complains about the quality of life of husband and wife.

Third, poor communication and different views.

Teacher Z said that two people have different life experiences and different perceptions of the world, which leads to different values, world outlook and outlook on life.

These differences are reflected in daily hobbies, behaviors and language communication.

My wife likes to gossip about celebrities, and these Mr. Z can't get a word in, so my wife got a magazine and asked him to catch up until he could talk to her.

On holidays, Mr. Z feels that since there are old people at home, he still has to accompany them for the holidays. Every holiday, my wife will arrange to go out to play, even the traditional Spring Festival is no exception.

Fourth, the contradiction with family.

For remarried families, the first problem is how to deal with the children left by remarried wives and former couples.

Due to the sensitivity of the identity of both parties, if it is handled well, it will become incompatible once it is not handled well.

Mr. Z and his ex-wife have a daughter of 10 years old.

Seeing that his little wife is young and beautiful, the daughter insists that Mr. Z divorced his mother because of her looks. No matter how Mr. Ren Z explained his daughter, he didn't believe it. Mr. Z divorced her mother first, and then he had feelings for his little wife.

So whenever Mr Z's daughter sees his little wife, she will bark at the fox and accuse him at the same time.

Like all men, Mr. Z is ungrateful and only likes young women.

Mr. Z always comforts his little wife before coaxing his daughter, and then he is exhausted. Mr. Z is not only afraid that his little wife will be sad or even hate his daughter, but also worried that her daughter has extreme values since she was a child.

Fifth, the pressure brought by public opinion orientation.

Such couples usually have to face the pressure of public opinion when they get married.

In the elderly, or in the secular cognition, this is an unconventional thing, which can't be accepted frankly, and it can easily become the talk of others after dinner.

Mr. Z's friends often tease him that he is "very lucky".

Sometimes Mr. Z is anxious to get off work, and colleagues will tease him that he has a little wife waiting at home.

Mr. Z has also heard from his neighbors that he is an "old cow eating young grass" and can be someone else's father no matter how old he is.

The pressure of public opinion is terrible, it can always easily destroy a person's strength and disintegrate a person's mind.

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In fact, in the celebrity circle, we often see the combination of an old man and several wives. Why do they look so harmonious?

Jin Yong and Lin Leyi.

Jin Yong and Lin Leyi met.

These two people who are 29 years apart have become friends. In Lin Leyi's eyes, Jin Yong is not only a knowledgeable teacher, but also a big friend who is often fragile and needs understanding.

After marriage, Jin Yong and his wife Lin Leyi attended meetings, lectures and other social occasions together.

Li Ao and Wang Xiaotun.

The difference between the two is 30 years. From 65438 to 0985, he met Li Ao, and then began to associate. They have a son and a daughter. They have lived together for half their lives. Li Ao wrote in his autobiography: "After marriage, Xiaotun gave me a stable rear and made my heart feel warm ..."

First: people outside our lives, masters, gods;

Second: based on worship and full support from the rear;

Third: more free and easy than ordinary people, pay more attention to spiritual pursuit. Without our actual life, their life is not based on daily necessities.

03、

Men are much older than women, with relatively stable and independent economic conditions, rich social experience, rich sense of humor, mature and steady masculinity and charm, which will give women a sense of trust and security.

Therefore, young women will be attracted, and with the rich experience of older husbands, they will soon improve themselves. Spoiled, age makes men mature and become women who can take care of themselves.

For women, age directly affects women's appearance, while men are often associated with appearance.

Younger women are simpler and more likely to arouse men's desire for protection.

Young people are more energetic, while when a man is old, he often looks forward to having an energetic woman around him, which will also make him feel as if he has regained his youthful vitality.

In fact, most people in life are ordinary people, and our responsibility is really great. Money, rice, oil, salt and family ties bind us together. Remember, it is best to choose what suits you.

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