People are social animals, and they will always meet all kinds of people in their lives and work. Everyone's living habits are different, and some people are maverick and don't like to adapt to public tastes.

A friend of mine is an independent and tenacious person. He usually doesn't like eating and entertaining with everyone, and he doesn't like makeup and fashion. When we are together, he will also talk about some topics with everyone, and he does not envy going to socialize and buy like the wind. Silently, when everyone is still playing after work, where there are new snacks that are particularly delicious and where there are new clothing stores, people have quietly obtained advanced vocational qualification certificates and got perfect promotion and salary increase. Over the past few years, they have successfully achieved the position of department director because of their own efforts and continuous mastery of their own abilities.

The same living environment, the same circle, those seemingly unsociable people are actually working hard silently. You can really do two things at once or even more.

Don't blame the circle for being too small to see Bole, and don't blame others for being stupid. Many times, you need your own self-discipline. On the other hand, one does not necessarily look at friends around him. A person who has no opinion and goes with the flow cannot complain about being influenced by others. Why can't he do something positive in turn and influence others?

There are many examples in reality. At that time, people who were regarded as fools, weirdos, A Dai and unsociable people all went to the peak of their lives after experiencing the test of time. There is a sentence in the book that is worth pondering. "If the whole world is a thief and only you don't steal, then you are a bad person." . This sentence is not unreasonable. Nowadays, many fashions follow suit, and you will be recognized by the public. On the contrary, you will be considered conservative.

I met my friends several times recently. Many people are playing all kinds of video software, all kinds of online games and shopping on all kinds of websites. I said I've never played before. Friends' dumb feelings are just a little silly and don't follow the trend. In fact, I just played an entertainment that I know is almost the same, and it is not worthy of deep fascination. However, this kind of mass consumption and entertainment is just like playing candy games when I was a child. When everyone else was playing and eating when I was a child, only a few children were reading books at night. Every day is a little bit worse, and after more than ten years, it is a world of difference.

Looking back, are we ashamed of those who seem to be unsociable?

They don't fit in, they just take a comfortable path.

When I first entered the university, there were eight people living in a dormitory, and it was very noisy every day. However, now in my mind, I only keep the figure of him standing in the military posture during military training.

His name is Jing, my college roommate. He is thin, but not handsome at all. When I first met him, I just nodded and smiled, and then I was busy with my affairs in the dormitory. It seems that he doesn't care about his roommate at all, and he has no curiosity at all. Usually when chatting with roommates, they also ask him a question and answer a question. When they didn't ask him, he listened quietly, as if he had melted into the air.

He stood in the row in front of me all the time during the military training in the university, and his standing posture was wobbly, as if he would fall at any time. Not surprisingly, he is a student taken care of by his tutor. During the break, we teased him, but he didn't respond and laughed it off. This is the highlight of his four years in college.

After the military training, he naturally disappeared with many boys in this science and technology boys' school. Although he goes back to the dormitory for class every day, we still miss him unconsciously, playing ball, eating, socializing, shopping and surfing in Internet cafes. He was absent from all the activities that should have taken place in adolescence.

The last time I saw him was when I graduated from college. At that time, everyone was busy writing graduation thesis, defending thesis, filming graduation photo, getting graduation certificate and having graduation dinner. I didn't see him at the graduation dinner. I called him and he said he had gone to Wenchuan to be a volunteer. That year, Wenchuan earthquake.

I suddenly lost my mind. I don't know when he left school I asked him, did you answer your thesis, get graduation photo, and get your diploma? He didn't answer at all, saying that the signal there was bad, so he hung up. At the dinner table, I reported it to the teacher. The teacher said that he knew that Jing had left after his defense and promised to send Jing's diploma home.

That night, my classmate was drunk and cried, but I have been trying to remember the last time I saw the scenery.

Two years later, I got a phone call from him unexpectedly.

"MoXiong, river's lake emergency. I need 500 yuan and I will pay you back in two years. "

I know his character, Dont Ask For Help is easy. I asked him where he sent it, but I didn't ask why. He quoted an address, which is a temple on a mountain in Jiangxi Province. In a flash, I was confused again. "Why did you run to the temple?" .

He said that when he was in Wenchuan for disaster relief and reconstruction, he felt the hardships on earth and couldn't calm down, so he went to the temple to fast and pray.

"So you are a monk now?"

"lay disciple."

"Can you get married?"

"That's not the point ..."

In the spring of 20 13, he sent me 500 yuan and a photo of him standing on the top of the mountain. He looks very calm in the photo, and there is a landline number behind the photo.

"How long are you going to stay?"

"I like life here very much, simple and pure."

But your parents need you.

He was silent.

"This is a quiet harbor where people can see themselves clearly and find themselves. I suggest you stay there for a while. "

"... I'm married ..."

"That's not the point ..."

I said, your parents won't like this color daughter-in-law.

He replied: This is really not the point. ...

Now, in the heavy work and life, I always think of him from time to time. He seems to be a lighthouse, illuminating the road to another life. What's wrong with being alone? At least live a pure and comfortable life.

My parents called me a widow more than once.

Qu zhong and the widow.

I have always believed in one truth.

When you are lonely, a group of people are carnival, and carnival is the loneliness of a group of people.

I'm a lone ranger and a widow.

But I don't think there's anything wrong with being unsociable.

Even loneliness has taught me a lot.

So that I can grow up quickly.

I was lonely at school, probably because I was younger than others.

I was born in 1990. When I went to school, the age limit was not as strict as it is now, so there will be a gap of two or three years in my class, which is two years worse than the average age of my class.

These two years old were a disaster when I was young.

Because I am short, I have been bullied by my classmates.

This also caused my rather withdrawn personality.

But later, after graduating from college, I found that being withdrawn is not a bad thing.

First of all, being withdrawn can make me grow up quickly.

Since childhood, my personal character cultivation and age purchasing have kept me away from bars, KTV, night shows and other entertainment places that my peers like, and I have a lot of time to be alone.

I will spend my time alone reading and studying.

After graduation, I worked in a newspaper for two years. In the past two years, because of work, many things need to be examined by myself, and I can't speak for everyone, which also accelerates my withdrawn personality.

And during this time, I found my own specialty.

Words.

In the past three years, I have read through the history of the Ming Dynasty, including: Ming History, Ming History, Biography of Zhu Yuanzhang, Biography of Xu Da, etc. In the past three years, I personally wrote a history book, Laughing at Zhu Yuanzhang.

At the same time, I began to teach myself philosophy.

These cultures have made me form a set of historical philosophy of personal cognition.

Although these are my personal understandings, I think they are very useful for my life.

At least I learned confidence, strength and a lot of fun.

These are all taught me by loneliness.

Here, I deeply appreciate being alone.

Thank you for your loneliness.

I just don't fit in. But that was before I was 27, and now I feel that my personality is much better.

I am mainly influenced by my family, except my mother.