As the saying goes, disaster comes from the mouth. Is the girl opposite your wife? You should pay attention to what you say and some basic skills. Don't say "I love you" on the first date! Assess the situation, you are a hero in love.
I have made a successful appointment with my partner, but I don't know what to say on the date. Besides, I also want to know whether it is appropriate to say "like" to each other on the first date.
The success of dating has a lot to do with your charm.
First of all, the most important thing is that instead of talking about yourself, it is better to listen to each other enthusiastically, while staring at each other's eyes and mouth, and show interest in each other's words, especially when the other person talks about something he is very proud of. You should show that you are also interested and make him realize this.
When you speak, your expression should be cheerful, your speech should be clear, and your answers to each other's questions should be simple and clear.
It is also important to prepare questions in advance. If you know what the other person is interested in, then prepare more conversation topics related to this topic.
Secondly, moderately praising each other is also the secret of success. But fawning on others is too obvious. As for the other person's appearance and figure, it is best to avoid compliments on the first date. If you are a man, praise the other person's unusual hairstyle, dress and temperament. If you are a woman, praise the other person's knowledge and technology, or the extraordinary taste of brand-name lighters and ties used on you. The topics that should be avoided when dating are showing injustice or dissatisfaction with anything, speaking ill of others or criticizing others. These topics will not only ruin the happy atmosphere when dating, but also make the other party doubt your character.
Secondly, to the question whether it is appropriate to say "like" on the first date, my answer is "better not". Because it's only the first date, I don't know much about each other's thoughts. If I ask this kind of question rashly, it will shock the other person and make them at a loss, and there may be no second date. Just know that the other person is willing to keep the appointment, don't hate yourself. Don't forget that "love" is not one-sided wishful thinking, it must be cultivated naturally through dating again and again. Even if you don't say "like", as long as you can feel the other person's friendly attitude towards you, this is the performance of "like" As long as you don't say "like" in particular, the other party should have a great chance to accept the second date happily. Besides, saying "I love you" is likely to backfire.
Let me talk about a young man who thinks about what he should say. One day, he made an appointment with the woman he liked to go to the movies together. The day before the appointment, he came to the station he had agreed with the other party, and then walked from the station to the cinema. As he walked, he counted the steps and calculated the time needed to walk this road. Then, during the walk with her, think about what to say and practice again and again.
If you want love to succeed, you must have this level of enthusiasm. Ordinary people do not make special plans. In the limited few minutes, everything is specially prepared. However, just trying once and practicing speaking often should produce unexpected results. When taking the entrance examination or employment examination, everyone will prepare carefully, but I think it is a bit too cautious to spend so much effort to prepare a speech on a date. I feel very strange about this. Of course, there is no need to make it too difficult, but especially on the first date, you must be as careful as possible and try to be prepared.
Don't be too glib, just try to convey your sincerity to each other.
Reliable dating skills
Matters needing attention when dining with women:
A. Take the initiative to invite her to dinner, because most girls don't want to say that they are hungry.
B. Ask her what she wants to eat first. If she doesn't comment, you can decide the menu yourself. Don't push it around, because you think being polite to each other will actually embarrass them. Be careful not to touch your teeth when ordering, because it will spoil the atmosphere.
C. Try not to make any noise while eating. You should talk to your heart while eating.
D. You can eat as much as you want. Girls usually like boys with big appetites.
Precautions for drinking:
A. Never force your girlfriend to drink on the first date, which will make her unhappy. She can also refuse to date you again on the pretext that you force her to drink.
B. whether you can or not, don't pretend to be massive.
C. If she drinks it and her face turns red, you should praise her.
If you are late for an appointment:
I rushed to the appointment place, gasped and sincerely apologized to the other party, and then naturally made an excuse, such as "Zhongshan Road was caught in traffic, so I jumped out of the car and ran there, out of breath." Or: "I want to find you a gift that you like, so that I can't catch up with the time ..." In short, be reasonable and don't let her know that you are late because of your carelessness, which has nothing to do with any car or gift. This kind of commitment helps to dispel his girlfriend's dissatisfaction, and the motive is good, so it can't be regarded as malicious deception. However, this kind of thing must not happen again. If you tell too many lies, the stuffing will eventually come out.
Say goodbye to her skills:
It's best to say goodbye to her at the right station, wait with her until the bus comes, and then leave after she gets on the bus. So that women won't feel that you are not tightly entangled. If she is willing to let you take her home, it means that she has a little mutual affinity for you. At this time, the time must be separated, that is to say, the first date should end when the girl still wants to get along with you. This is the trick to make her look forward to her next date. At the same time, you should use the following invitation skills. For example, while waiting for the bus, you ask her, "Today is the summer solstice. Do you know what the summer solstice means? " She said she didn't know, and then the car came. You said, "Well, I'll tell you on our next date."
Repeat the next time and place, and then send her to the car. In other words, when she was about to break up, she said this sentence:
I had a wonderful evening with you. You must stop at once and say, "Great. I will make you happier next time. " Then repeat the time and place of the next appointment as appropriate.
Dating skills of boys
1) Don't lie, never lie, never. If it's just a one-night stand, that's fine. If you talk nonsense for fun, that's great. You won the second date. Then, from now on, you have to act like a liar on your first date. The tricky thing is that after the fifth date, you have to spend two days reviewing your previous lies before each date.
2) Don't hit your face and pretend to be fat. Your date may be as happy as that fat man. But her phone call was to that person, and she had seen that person and even slept in that person's bed. But when she finally scolded your mother, it was you, not him.
3) Don't surprise her with movies and delicious food on the first date unless you know a little about her likes and dislikes. It's not a good idea to take an innocent girl who completely trusts you to see Ten Torture in Tang Dynasty's harem.
4) A little sense of humor (as accurate as possible) will be your best ally. Women always like people who can make them laugh.
5) Pay attention to cleaning nails.
6) Don't lie about this date and what happened to others, which usually turns into a big mistake. Further suggestions
7) Don't take off your pants before taking off your socks.
8)* * * *——& gt； Sleep, wet through. Caressing-> kissing-> * * *-> Rest is the right thing. More practice will make you progress, but it will never be perfect. Before meeting your prince (princess), you must kiss countless frogs. Good luck!
After the first date, you can't help asking yourself, "How did I behave just now?" . Everyone in the world has their own habits and language. Although these personal behaviors or habits should belong to private affairs, if you think that some of them can increase the appeal of beauty, make you graceful and charming, and become an important factor to win the favor of girls, while some habitual actions and language make girls stunned and bored, which becomes a stumbling block on your love road and leads to your repeated failures in love, you will have the motivation to "promote its goodness and avoid its evils". The following contents may have some implications for men in love. 1 Don't be cool: flick your fingers and smoke like no one's watching; Comb your hair too much in front of the mirror and twist your ass when you walk. No one likes such a vulgar person: sitting down always likes to roll up his trouser legs; Hip and leg, swing; Spitting everywhere; Speak in uncivilized language; I smoked cigarette butts all the way; Pull out the beard by hand; Put your feet on the front seat in public places such as cinemas; When smoking, the mouth makes a "click" sound; Open your mouth when writing an article; Always take off your shoes and socks and smell your feet; Burp; After eating, mash it in your mouth with a toothpick; Knock on the bowl with chopsticks when eating; If you don't choose a place, fall asleep; Scratch the scalp; Always pick your nose with your fingers and count money in front of everyone; Be happy and dance; Staring at other girls; The beautiful woman walked by and stared at her back. 3 If a man is "feminine", such as blinking too often; Cover your mouth with your hand when you laugh; Sissy, not to mention women, even men themselves can't stand it. In addition to these, you should also pay attention to "speak more and read more" sweet words, but they must not be excessive, otherwise it will easily leave a bad impression on girls: this person is glib and dishonest!
Both men and women should be punctual when dating, so as to feel each other's sincerity. If they are unexpectedly late, they should apologize and explain why. After the meeting, they should look natural and graceful. If you are too shy, it will cause the other person's restraint. Too free and easy will often arouse the suspicion of the other party. When listening to each other, don't be absent-minded or stare at each other. It is advisable to look natural. Dress neatly and without affectation. ※. As the saying goes, "seven points are looks, and three points are dressing up." For those who go on a date, it is necessary to dress better than usual, which is to pay attention to the performance of the date and the other party. Women's clothes can be more colorful. This man shouldn't wear dirty clothes to date. Pay attention to the cleanliness of shirts and handkerchiefs in summer. If possible, choose clothes that best suit your skin color and figure, and wear them to "foster strengths and avoid weaknesses". Of course, excessive pursuit of fashionable clothes often has the opposite effect. It's probably a custom in China to speak enthusiastically and not frivolous. The protagonist of the first date should be the man, while the woman is more reserved. The man actually asked some questions on his own initiative, which attracted Tan Xing's attention. ※. Both sides should avoid long silence. The content of the conversation should be broad and popular, the questions should be brief, and the other party should be willing and able to answer. You can talk about work, study, hobbies, and trivial things in life. Don't embarrass the other person, let alone ask some questions that are difficult for the other person to say. If the other person is silent and unresponsive, you should change the subject quickly. Both men and women can consciously introduce themselves, including their family members, personal hobbies and specialties, but don't brag about themselves. Some young people have some bad habits. Don't let them spoil the scenery on the first date. Swearing should not be said, otherwise it will be regarded as disrespectful, uncivilized and impolite to each other. The appointment place is a public place that both parties are familiar with, and a public place that both parties are familiar with is appropriate. Such as parks, squares, rivers, lakes, music cafes, theaters, etc. ※. It's best not to be alone at the party's home or in a strange place. Pay more attention to this on the first date. The location of the date, preferably a quiet and not too remote place. Quiet can create a good atmosphere for dating and facilitate conversation, but it is too remote and unsafe. When choosing an appointment place, it is best to consider the distance between the two parties, especially the distance of the woman's appointment. A girl once told people that her boyfriend is very considerate. Ask her what she can see from it. She said: "For all the dates, the place he chose was quite close to my place of work, but he ran a long way for my convenience." The topic of dating should be relaxed and happy, which is the best time to get to know each other and express yourself. At this time, you should take the initiative in the conversation, learn as much as possible about each other's interests and hobbies from the conversation, avoid exposing your shortcomings to each other as soon as possible, and make the situation develop in your own favor. ※. The topic of dating is best to make the atmosphere happy. Therefore, when dating, you must keep a happy mood and mentality. ※. Because dating is not a class, you don't need to preach or inspire your personality, so the topic must be relaxed. If she likes to talk a lot, don't interrupt her discussion Just be a loyal listener. At the same time, don't talk about some academic topics yourself. When dating, it is best to learn from things that often happen around you, such as TV programs and social pages of newspapers, or learn from music, sports and lovely pets around you, such as cats, dogs, tropical fish, pigeons and birds, because talking about relaxed and interesting topics can bring us closer together. Dating etiquette cannot be ignored. As a special social form, dating should permeate the color of modern culture, and politeness runs through the whole process of dating. Pay attention to etiquette when making an appointment. ※. When sending an invitation, whether it is an oral invitation, a telephone invitation or a letter invitation, the initiator should use a polite and negotiated tone instead of an imperative tone. When deciding on the appointment place, you should first ask the other party's opinion and take the convenience of the other party as the principle. If the other party makes it clear that you want to make a decision, you can put forward your own opinions and ask the other party to make a decision. You can only make a decision if the other party thinks it is appropriate. Speaking of time, etiquette is more important. Generally speaking, the inviter should arrive for a period of time first, which is a respect for the other party. In case of special circumstances, if you can't keep the appointment on time or need to change the appointment time, you should try to inform the other party. If you really can't tell each other, you should apologize to each other afterwards. Because it is impolite to stand up. The party who comes first should also give understanding and comfort to the party who is late or who stands up for special reasons, and don't make trouble without reason. The termination of an appointment is usually proposed by the date and the woman. Of course, the inviter and the man can terminate the appointment directly if there is an emergency, but they should apologize to each other. On a date, if you don't think the other person is the only thrill, don't just talk for three or five minutes and leave. If two people have nothing to say, they can talk about something else. After forming a certain atmosphere, they politely ask to leave. After the date, the man should send the woman, which is a respect for women. If it is not too late or during the day, you can put the woman on the car or tram and watch her go; If it's late at night, take the initiative to send this woman home. If the woman doesn't respond, she should always send it to her door.
When dating, you can concentrate on the conversation, actively respond to the conversation, constantly "stimulate" the development of the conversation and improve the heat of the conversation. Then, your conversation will be one-on-one, talking and laughing, just like "diamond cut diamond, he will meet a good man, and everyone will know him". The more you talk to your lover, the more interested you are, and even there is not enough time. But in general, no matter how interested you are in talking with your lover, you must be ready to end the date at the right time. You must let your conversation not interfere with your lover's work the next day and disturb his or her life order. Since you are dating him (her) for the first time after all, don't ruin the good results you have achieved by trying to prolong the fun and interest of the conversation. When it's time to end, end it quickly, leaving the other party with an unfinished suspense. This is also to keep the conversation going and make you talk more enthusiastically when you date him or her for the second time. ◆ Seek common ground while reserving differences, and talk about hot topics ◆ If you have different interests from your lover, it is easy for people to feel that "lovers talk too much" and it is difficult to produce * * *. However, difference doesn't necessarily mean that you can't find any similarities. For example, if you love reading and writing, and he or she loves singing and dancing, there may be less common topics, but you should watch movies and TV often. You don't talk about reading, writing, singing and dancing, but you can always find the same language by evaluating the current domestic and foreign film and television programs, right? You can communicate around the plot, characters, expressions, performing arts and so on in movies and TV. In the process of discussing these, our ideas about life, society, right and wrong can be displayed, so as to achieve the purpose of mutual understanding. If he (she) is not even interested in art, you can also talk about current news, anecdotes, recent hot topics, or talk about problems encountered at work and so on. If your jobs are the same or similar, there will be more topics. You can talk about the success or failure of your work, the difficult problems you encounter, food, clothing, housing and transportation and other public topics. In fact, whether the conversation can be speculative or not, and whether there will be a "silence" is related to the situation of both sides of the conversation. If your lover is a man of few words, it is not easy to talk about it. Try to speak for yourself. If your lover is an enthusiastic talker, he or she will respond to your conversation at any time, so that the date will be held in a very congenial atmosphere. In short, as long as you adopt the strategy of seeking common ground while reserving differences, there are still many hot topics to talk about when dating. The key is to see if you can flexibly and skillfully find and grasp the topics of mutual interest according to the specific situation of the other party's conversation, and talk enthusiastically and freely. Capture topics randomly by moving and calming ◆ The dating place of lovers can be indoor or outdoor. If you can't find a topic that interests your lover after chatting with him, it's really on pins and needles to sit down again. Silence is unbearable. Then, it is a good way to break the deadlock by offering to let your lover stand up and take a walk. When walking, you can always capture the scenes, people and things around you as a topic. Generally speaking, if your lover doesn't show bad mood to you, he will respond positively to your conversation even if he is depressed. Because the beautiful nature provides you with a warm, active, relaxed and broad romantic atmosphere, lovers immersed in it will really feel that everything is pleasing to the eye, everything is pleasing to the ear and everything is pleasant to talk about. Wen Tao went to Donghu Park on the date of his girlfriend Xue Zhu. Although they don't know each other very well, literature is their hobby, and naturally they have a lot in common. What good books have they read recently? What new works are published and other topics are discussed enthusiastically. Maybe it's because I'm tired of talking, or maybe this topic should be over. When Xue Zhu's incisive introduction to today's business culture and cultural business finally came to an end, Wen Tao didn't continue to speak in time, and a "blank" suddenly appeared between them. They looked at each other and were very embarrassed. When Xue Zhu saw this, he immediately "closed the field": "Let's get up and go!" Wen Tao responded: "That's what I thought!" Really "there is a lover in my heart and the world outside." Xue Zhu got up and looked up. There were too many topics around her for them to discuss: green shade, fragrant flowers and plants, bright moon and starry sky, rippling lake water, cuddling and lingering couples ... She believed in the topic of "coming" and strolled with Wen Tao. Tan Xing was full of charm. Thus, Xue Zhu has strong adaptability in dating. Facing the instant "silence" with her boyfriend, she resolutely calmed down by moving, and guided Wen Tao to find a random topic in the moving, thus ensuring a positive, harmonious, natural and pleasant conversation atmosphere between them. When dating, some lovers like to say some complicated pleasantries in order to show their gentleness, or open their mouths and shut their mouths to talk about some high-profile truths, which will easily increase the psychological pressure of lovers and lead to "silence". In fact, too many greetings and ceremonies do not give your lover the courtesy he or she deserves. On the contrary, it shows that your relationship with him or her is still sparse and has not reached an informal level. Keeping your mouth shut and your tone high doesn't mean you are knowledgeable. It just means that you are not talking to him (her) on an equal basis, but lecturing him (her) with a condescending leader or mentor tone. In this way, from the beginning, you put him (her) in an unequal position with you. Why didn't he (she) talk to you without suspicion or moderation? Dating is heart to heart. If you are honest with each other, you will generally get a positive response from him or her. It is useless to promote each other's emotional development, even if you search a lot of diplomatic words. Only sincerity, enthusiasm, friendliness, frankness, wit and no thinking can reduce his/her psychological pressure, break his/her silence and arouse his/her interest in conversation. Bypass the "minefield" and break the deadlock with humor. Because people don't know much about the first date, it is inevitable to break into the "minefield" of lovers when talking. Talking about the topic of scars that lovers don't want to talk about will not only lead to a serious deadlock, but also be embarrassed in embarrassment. However, don't be nervous at this time! Since he (she) is hiding something, he (she) doesn't want to talk too much or at all about this unpleasant topic, so you don't have to ask what will happen next. At this time, you can try to change the subject and get out of trouble with humor. Yanling once had a painful love experience. She was crazy about her boyfriend, but his boyfriend finally abandoned her and went to be romantic with other girls. Once, she dated her second boyfriend, Xiao Yao, and Xiao Yao asked her, "What do you think of casting a net in love and focusing on catching fish?" Unexpectedly, when his words came out, Yanling not only ignored him, but suddenly turned pale. Xiao Yao knew that he had strayed into his lover's minefield and quickly added, "Oh, please don't mind. I mean, I have an ironic story about cheating on your love. The story says that a man who cheats on his wife often takes his mistress home for the night when his wife is not at home, but he is often worried that her will find out. Then, one night, he suddenly woke up from his dream, hurriedly pushed his wife around and said,' Get up and go, my wife is back.' He was startled when his wife woke up from her dream. "Xiaoyao voice did not fall, Yanling was amused by his humorous story. Here, Xiao Yao first shifted the direction of their conversation in the form of stories, and then played down the unpleasant feelings brought to Yan Ling by her casual speech with humorous appeal, thus naturally and skillfully bridging the possible "ice" and winning the happy smile of her sweetheart. "Silence" in dating can happen at any time. Due to different specific circumstances, there are various ways to avoid this embarrassing dilemma skillfully. The key lies in sizing up the situation, grasping the atmosphere of two people's conversation according to the situation, keenly capturing information, excavating the connotation of two people's conversation and expanding the extension of two people's conversation. In this way, your date will have a continuous topic and achieve the goal of "endless words in his heart".