I don't hate life. I hate life without money.

Every time I find the key to success, someone secretly changes the lock.

Since I learned to talk back, my wife also learned to sharpen the knife.

We should know how to cherish and protect everyone around us, because looking back at us who broke our neck in our last life, we met in this life.

6. Send a message to my husband: Do you know where the bank card is? I need it badly. Come back early! Husband replied: I know!

7. When I was a child, I hated eating and sleeping. Now that I think about it, I really don't know when I was blessed!

Losing weight is the most anti-human thing in the world. If you don't eat, you want to hit someone, and if you eat, you want to hit yourself.

9. It is said that money is the greatest pain of mankind. Then let me suffer!

10. "I can borrow money, but I have to discuss it with my wife first." "Don't you have no daughter-in-law?" "Yes, so there is no discussion!"

Whenever I am ready to study hard, the world becomes wonderful, and any troubles can deeply attract me.

Since my parents can play WeChat. I am not sentimental, sad, loving, and take photos without revealing my clothes. The whole person is full of positive energy.

If you want to fall in love with me, give me love and a bag. I'll buy it myself.

If you are always disappointed, you should reflect on why you have such great hope.

Fifteen. When I was a child, I thought I could save the world when I grew up. When I grow up, I find that the whole world can't save me.

Sixteen years old. On average, one in every 365 people is celebrating their birthday, and suddenly I feel that the sprinkler is really creative in order not to offend people.

17. The gap between ideal and reality is that "I want to have a home" in the past, and now it is "I hope not to be driven out by the landlord".

18. The expert said that varicose veins are easy to get in the late stage, so I sat down. Experts say that sitting is easy to cause lumbar disc herniation, so I will lie down. Experts say that lying down is easy to get cervical spondylosis.

19. I hurt my wrist. The doctor just put a thick bandage on it. My wife looked at the doctor nervously: "doctor, this, this doesn't affect his washing dishes, does it?"

In fact, we can boil all the problems down to two kinds: one is hungry without food, and the other is full.

Twenty one. It is suggested to put some colorful ribbons in the tires, so that a flat tire can be regarded as a surprise and not be in a bad mood.

Twenty-two I always believed that I would be thin, but now I'm just playing fat. I didn't expect to get high after playing.

23. Some parents educate their children. There is no scientific method, no rules, and it is entirely by touching ... like my dad!

24. Mom likes shopping. On one occasion, she bought a coat for her father, but the father who didn't send a circle of friends wrote: the wool is on the sheep, and the sheep is happy!

Twenty-five At a literary evening, the host took the stage to announce the curtain call. Please enjoy the following: Xinjiang song and dance, lift your skull.

Twenty-six. I finally got used to my appearance, got a haircut and changed my ugly method.

27. The same thing. When my mother asked me to do it, she said, "How old are you?" And when I want to do it: "How old are you?"

28. I am not a simple and thrifty person. I just have no money!

29. Take your girlfriend to the amusement park to ride a roller coaster. Other people's girlfriends: Ah, how horrible! Girlfriend: Ouch!