"The New Year, want to go home. Look at what others say, I'm still alone. Although I look forward to the new year and miss these beautiful feelings, I am more worried, embarrassed and worried. " This is the content of a blog post on the top of the leftover women. Facing the expectation of parents and the concern of relatives and friends, the leftover women are under great pressure. According to relevant surveys, the number of "leftover women" in Beijing has exceeded 500,000, of which 89.94% are highly educated women. At present, the number of "leftover women" in Shanghai has also exceeded 1.5 million. "There are no leftover women, only leftover men" has become a strange phenomenon in the city.

Most of the urban "leftover women" are described as such a group: high income, high education and old age. They used to be valued by everyone, but now they are caught in a different kind of embarrassment because of their unmarried status. The joy of saying goodbye to the old and welcoming the new is also complicated and emotional because of the infiltration of various emotions. Niu Jianlin, an expert at Shanghai Chunyue Psychological Counseling Center, said: How to correct the mentality and avoid the misunderstanding of "I would rather marry than give in to men" has become a problem that women must face squarely.

Watching yourself change from a teenage girl to a "leftover woman"

Jia Jia, born in 1980, is 29 years old. She is still single and has mixed feelings in the face of the coming New Year. Jia Jia's parents are both senior officials. They are very strict with her at ordinary times, but they are busy with official business and don't have much time to spend with Jia Jia. In high school, Jia Jia had an affair with her classmates. Boys are not good at reading. After the college entrance examination, Jia Jia was admitted to Fudan University, but the boys were only admitted to a local junior college. The disparity in educational background and family environment ended the relationship between the young men and women with the graduation from high school. Jia Jia said that she missed that wonderful "puppy love" and will still think of that boy until now.

After four years in college, influenced by that relationship, Jia Jia seldom contacted with boys, let alone fell in love. After graduation, with the help of her father, she entered a fortune 500 company. The generous salary and regular life make Jia Jia feel at ease. So, at the urging of her parents, she started a blind date, but each relationship didn't last long. The longest one lasted about a year, and everyone was ready to talk about marriage. In the end, they broke up because of differences over buying a house. Jia Jia said: Every time she falls in love, she is very attentive, but she always feels something is wrong. Recently, she just ended a relationship with a colleague, and they have been together for less than half a year.

It has been eight years since I graduated from high school. For eight years, she has never been able to walk on the red carpet of marriage. This makes her afraid to hold too many hopes and fantasies about her true feelings, and at the same time, her enthusiasm and yearning for marriage are slowly decreasing. Looking at parents' anxious eyes and listening to their endless nagging, Jia Jia felt unprecedented anxiety. Facing the arrival of another New Year, Jia Jia lost her former happiness, because her age and marriage will once again become a hot topic among her elders and relatives. Jia Jia told reporters with emotion: "Before, I never worried about my age. But with the approaching of the 30-year-old mark, my heart really breeds a kind of emotion, which is called' vacant' and' anxiety'. Facing the constant urging of parents and the concern of relatives and friends, I have lost my composure and calmness. Happy new year. When I was a child, my mother always said to me,' Jia Jia is one year older and a sensible girl.' Now I am an old maid in the eyes of others! "