In fact, this state is the norm for many of us. Many people want to change, but they don't know where to start. Then, you must read Willpower: The Psychology of Self-control, Concentration and Efficiency (hereinafter referred to as Willpower) written by Roy baumeister and John Sunny.
In the preface, someone commented on the book willpower: for everyone who wants to lose weight, quit smoking, drink less or work more efficiently and laboriously, this is a manual from heaven.
When psychologists are looking for personal qualities that can predict success, they all find that willpower is our innate ability, which can benefit us for life. Mastering the key of "willpower", we will know how to control our actions, arrange our life, work and study in a limited time and make our life more comfortable.
Next, let's take a look at how the author guides us to apply willpower to study, work and life from three aspects, so that our lives will undergo tremendous changes and lead to success.
1. Willpower is an important ability to help us succeed.
Mencius, a sage in Asia, once said that the general meaning of our translation is that when a great responsibility is placed on a person that day, it will inevitably cause him a lot of unhappiness. Through those hardships, he will be alert in his heart, firm in character, and increase his talents that he does not have.
To sum up, willpower is actually a person's ability to achieve success by overcoming hardships and setbacks, consciously setting goals, standardizing and controlling actions, and realizing psychological control over behavior. Simply put: willpower is our self-control.
More than 40 years ago, Stanford University psychologist Mitchell made a "cotton candy experiment" to test children's willpower. She gave the children a marshmallow and told them that she would leave the room for a while. In the meantime, the children have two choices. Either eat now or/kloc-eat more marshmallows in 0/5 minutes. Through experiments and years of follow-up research, they found that children who persist in resisting temptation 15 minutes have better academic performance, higher wages, are more liked by their peers, and are more likely to succeed when they grow up.
You think it's incredible, but it is. The book willpower tells us that willpower ranks first among the acquired factors that determine whether a person can succeed or not. Willpower is a consumable, just like muscle, which will make you tired. If the total amount of willpower is compared to an account, then the willpower of all actions is extracted from the same account. When we control some behaviors, we will inevitably consume willpower.
Anyone who has been a parent knows that helping children with their homework is a very painful thing. On the Internet, there is even a story about a father who helped his child to be admitted to hospital.
Many people regard it as a joke, but when we imagine it with our will, we are at work all day, facing all kinds of trivial things at work, rushing home on the crowded subway, preparing meals and cleaning up housework. I can finally sit down, but I have to face all kinds of pranks from Xiong Haizi. Do we still have extra energy to control our emotions? Too many things consumed our willpower, and at one time we were on the verge of collapse.
If this kind of consumption can be realized, we will choose to let the mother who is resting at home today guide us, or take a break and adjust for a while, and then pay attention to the children's homework, and the effect will definitely be better.
Willpower is like a marathon. We need to know how to distribute it reasonably in order to make ourselves more relaxed.
Second, willpower is eaten.
Have we found that when many people are hungry, if they don't eat in time, they can't help getting angry with the people around them. Especially before dinner, the emotions accumulated all day are most likely to erupt when you are hungry. In fact, this is the lack of self-control caused by willpower consumption.
If the human brain is compared to a computer, willpower is the power source. Without power, the computer can't run at all, and so can the brain. When willpower is exhausted, glucose is needed to supplement it.
Scientists have done such a study: let everyone play a computer game at the same time. The game was easy at first, but later it became more and more difficult. But players who drink sugary drinks can bury their grievances in their hearts and continue to play. Players who didn't take glucose supplements started swearing and playing computer games.
Therefore, when we know the influence of glucose on willpower, we must learn to adjust ourselves. For example, if we have to take exams, attend important meetings or complete important projects, we should not be on an empty stomach. When we travel abroad, we should have a good meal instead of exploring strange places on an empty stomach. This can avoid a lot of troubles and quarrels.
Is it true that people who eat black silk indiscriminately have stronger willpower? Of course not. As we all know, eating and drinking without restraint will only make people fat. People's various foods can be converted into glucose, thus supplementing willpower. High-sugar diet is easy to consume, rising fast, falling fast, and willpower is not easy to maintain.
But low-sugar meat, vegetables, protein and other foods are more likely to maintain blood sugar stability. Eating foods with low blood sugar can gain more stable self-control.
Interestingly, our bodies can adjust the loss of willpower by themselves. When we are sick, our immune system will consume a lot of glucose, and the body will use all its energy to fight the disease. As a result, we didn't have much energy to exercise and think, but fell asleep.
At the same time, when we lack sleep, it will also affect the processing and production of glucose, leading to a decline in self-control.
A laboratory study found that students who lack sleep are more likely to cheat in exams than other students in order to get more experimental rewards.
So, don't make important decisions when you are hungry, sick and weak, it will make you tired and make mistakes.
Third, exercise willpower to make study and work more efficient.
In our life, temptation is everywhere. Psychologists found that the success rate of resisting temptation with willpower is only 50%. Therefore, when we can't resist the temptation, we don't have to be so anxious. Because most of us actually started from the same place.
But why do we often find that successful people are more self-disciplined and able to control themselves than we are? That's because they have mastered ways to improve their willpower.
Through a large number of experimental investigations, the author draws a very interesting conclusion: willpower can grow like exercising muscles. How should I exercise?
The author tells us that three steps can improve willpower.
Step 1: Set reasonable goals.
The advantage of setting goals is not only to give yourself the motivation to persist, but also to monitor yourself.
The author mentioned a "Chua's effect" in psychology: if you want to ignore unfinished tasks, your unconscious will constantly remind you like an invisible man.
We should make a list of what not to do and learn to default to the bottom line. When buying clothes, only buy clothes that can be bought with cash in the bag, and resist shopping spree. Buying junk food in small packages can avoid eating more; No garbage in the kitchen can avoid piles of kitchen garbage; We should learn to delay gratification. When we are studying, we want to watch TV series and tell ourselves to watch it in a few days. Maybe we'll forget about it in a few days. This is more effective than telling yourself not to watch.
The second step is to form self-discipline by punching in all kinds of software. Or open your own efforts to the outside world and let external supervision form self-discipline.
For example, electronic scales can be connected to our mobile phones to record our daily weight curves, so that we can know our physical changes in real time. For example, learning to punch in with books can let us see how many books we have bought in Harle. These self-quantification can effectively help us achieve our goals and exercise our willpower.
Others like to post WeChat steps and running tracks to friends and make their efforts public. When presenting your behavior in front of outsiders, it will encourage you to persist and keep the person who loves sports.
The third step is to practice deliberately.
For example, change the lazy sitting posture, use the left hand that is not commonly used, and change the mantra. All these can exercise our willpower. This kind of exercise needs long-term persistence to be effective. Willpower is different in every field, and it is most effective in study and work.
Make clear the direction and goal of your efforts, keep a clean and tidy study and work environment, and form good study and work habits. Stick to it, and we will succeed more easily.
For example, we insist on brushing our teeth every day, believing that we can't eat anything after brushing our teeth at night. This unconsciousness will naturally constrain us to eat supper without consuming willpower to control it. In this way, we will have more energy to spend on study and work.
In fact, the book willpower not only tells us how to cultivate the ability of self-discipline, but also tells us that life is made up of the details of life. Sticking to details over time will create a successful life.
Dong Qing, intellectual, elegant and knowledgeable, is the dream of many women. She said in an interview: "I insist on reading an hour before going to bed and shaking every day." Someone asked me if I was bitter, and I said no, because it was a habit. "
There is a saying: the tears that flow now are all the water that entered the brain at the beginning. Eat bitter now, so as not to bow your head in the future. We struggle to get up for work every day, but we can't get paid until the end of the month. We have been studying hard for more than ten years, just to find a better job in the future.
Everyone has inertia, and all kinds of temptations in life are like a stumbling block, which makes many of us fail. Only those who are willing to make efforts and adhere to self-discipline can resist the temptation of future benefits. So when you are confused and frustrated, don't forget to open the book willpower, which will point out the direction of your life.