Correctly handle the relationship between love, study and career. Love is a major event in life, but it is not the whole of life. College students should focus on their studies, because learning is their main purpose. Career is higher than love, advocate career first, and it is not appropriate to fall in love too early. But don't think that love is a stumbling block to your career. If handled well, love can also play a catalytic role in your career.

2. Cultivate the ability to love. Its ability to love includes the following aspects:

(1) The ability to meet love.

If a person has love in his heart, he must dare to express it in the right way; If you face the love of others, you should be able to choose to accept or refuse in time. Can bear the psychological trouble of refusing or refusing courtship.

(2) the ability to refuse love.

You should have the courage to refuse love that you don't want to accept or think is not worth accepting. When you refuse, you should pay attention to two points: first, if you don't want to love, the tone of refusal should be decisive and firm, and there should be no room for hesitation, otherwise it will cause more harm to the other party. Second, we must master the proper way. You should master the way and degree of speaking. Although everyone has the right to refuse love, they should at least respect others.

3. Treat love setbacks correctly.

(1) Face the reality. The pain of lovelorn lies in the word "love". Love is two-way, mutual. Based on the love of both sides, if you lose either side, love will be out of balance and terminated. At this time, it is unrealistic for the lovelorn party to love the other party again. As a rational college student, we should face up to this reality.

(2) Empathy. Put yourself in each other's shoes. Doing so will help you understand the reason why the other party terminated love, help you accept the painful reality of lovelorn, and get out of the shadow of lovelorn as soon as possible.

(3) emotional catharsis. Don't hide or suppress the pain caused by lovelorn, but find an appropriate way to vent it. Usually vent methods are:

1) Tears relieving method. Crying when you are sad can calm your mood. Experts believe that tears can expel some toxins produced by the body during stress response.

2) Exercise relaxation method. Intense physical exercise helps to release the energy brought by excitement.

3) divert attention. When you are in a bad mood, you can do something that interests you.

4) Decoration method. When you fall in love without the person you love, give reasonable reasons and facts to explain your frustration, so as to get spiritual comfort.

5) talk. Tell your troubles to trusted teachers, classmates, friends, teachers, etc. You can also keep a diary or write letters. If you feel that your inner depression is too deep to be resolved, you can also seek psychological counseling from a psychological counselor.

(4) Situation transfer. The reason why it is difficult to get rid of the trouble of love after lovelorn is because all aspects of life are inextricably linked with former lovers, so if you want to get rid of the pain of lovelorn, you must change a brand-new environment and temporarily leave the once familiar environment. Put yourself in a happy environment. For example, making more friends, participating in some group entertainment activities, or looking for someone to go shopping, travel and relax, all of which will help broaden your mood. On the other hand, because there is a sense of emptiness after lovelorn, it is difficult to adapt for the time being, so you can enrich yourself with work or other methods to prevent yourself from thinking in your spare time practice.

(5) sublimation. As soon as possible, we should sublimate lovelorn love into a kind of motivation and devote ourselves to study or work as soon as possible. Don't be devastated by lovelorn love, thinking that life and life have lost their meaning. You know, love is an important part of life, but it is not the whole of life. We should treat love correctly, put it in a correct position, and handle the relationship between love and study, love and life, and love and marriage.

Correct the motivation of love.

Love is for finding like-minded lifelong partners in the future, not for comfort and excitement, not just for sexual satisfaction. The choice of love object is a complicated process, and factors such as economy, politics, culture and personality cannot be ignored, but the ideal orientation and moral sentiment of * * * are the most fundamental. The quality of love motivation is directly related to the success of love. As a bridge of the new era, college students' love view should be an organic combination of ideal, morality, career and sex.