I opened the door. She came out of the kitchen with a stiff smile on her face and her hands kept rubbing on her apron because of nervousness. She is an old lady in her fifties, thin, pale and with a straight nose.

Two months ago, I broke up with my boyfriend of five years. Half a month ago, I told my mother on the phone that I don't need you to come, I can take care of myself. Three days ago, my mother told me on the phone that I didn't trust you, so I hired a nanny for you.

I know that the person she invited is either a distant relative or a sister. However, I was shocked by the soft voice of the old lady across the street. She is from Nanjing. My mother in Taiyuan can find me a nanny in Nanjing. Besides, the client gave her the key to my house. I haven't come home yet, and the nanny has been on duty. Mom said on the phone, don't worry, Aunt Qin is very nice. She is an old friend of her mother. Because of financial problems at home, her mother advanced her salary for half a year.

Weekend. I took Aunt Qin to the market. Actually, I seldom come to the market. For five years, my boyfriend cooked, and I didn't even know how to turn on the gas. Aunt Qin always looks at me with a hint of warmth, as if she had known me for a long time.

At five o'clock in the evening, Aunt Qin will call me. She asked when she would get home, and finally added, pay attention to safety on the road. Four dishes and one soup for dinner, with a good combination of meat and vegetables. Fried taro without chopped green onion, cold beef without coriander, fried potato shreds with vinegar. She really did her homework and knew my diet like the back of her hand.

A week. She turned my messy home into a refreshing two-bedroom apartment. Several rose pillows were placed on the beige sofa, and the rich bamboo killed in the glass bottle in the corner was replaced by a big bunch of lilies. Sky blue linen replaced the heavy gray curtains. After Xiao Ran left, I often lay in a dark room, and the whole person seemed to fall into a black hole. At this time, I opened my eyes and saw that the sun reflected a touch of blue through the curtains, just like wandering in the ocean, and the whole person was light.

Aunt snail forever, this must be mom's idea. She knows how self-respecting I am. On the eve of the wedding, the groom-to-be ran away, and I still lived alone in our wedding room. In such a humiliating situation, I may not want to see my mother. So she gave me a snail aunt.

My alienation, her closeness

I talk to Aunt Qin mostly at the dinner table.

Her husband died young, her daughter married locally, and her son just joined the work after graduating from college. In recent years, she has been working in the city for her son's study. I said, so is my mother. I learned piano since I was a child, which is very expensive. She works during the day and works as a chaperone in the hospital at night. After graduating from college, I want to settle in this city. She sold her house in the city and moved to the country. Aunt Qin was very moved.

Aunt Qin asked, why did you break up with her?

Many people have asked her questions, including my mother. In fact, the answer is that he met true love three months before the wedding. Aunt Qin wants to say something else. I went to the study on an excuse. I don't think it's necessary to tell a nanny that much. People who get too close will become [Luo] [Suo]. I don't want her to be like my mother.

I deliberately alienated Aunt Qin. After breakfast, I will go to work. After dinner, I went into the bedroom. She must have sensed my estrangement. I've seen those embarrassed expressions many times.

The sink is a black hole. If you want to go deep into it, you will definitely fall. I began to lose interest in everything. On weekends, I slept soundly. At nine o'clock, she knocked at the door. At ten o'clock, she knocked at the door. At twelve o'clock, she knocked at the door. I finally got angry. I yelled at my mother on the phone that I was going to quit my nanny. However, when I opened the door, I couldn't open my mouth when I saw Aunt Qin's injured eyes and the food buckled in the Shanghai bowl on the dining table. How did she know? I want to abuse myself. Physical injury can share my mental pain.

I will go to a nightclub.

In the early morning, the phone kept ringing and I didn't answer it. Tears welled up in my eyes and a glass of red wine poured down my throat. Later, I remember being helped into a car. The next morning, I got a call from a man. He asked, are you okay? It turned out that he couldn't stand a girl getting drunk in a bar, so he called back the missed calls, a total of 28.

He said, don't do this in the future, your mother is scared to cry.

In the bathroom. Aunt Qin is cleaning the clothes I changed. I said, it can be machine washed. She looked up, nothing, just rubbed it. I saw her red and swollen eyes, full of blood. I suddenly feel how selfish I am. She really cares about me. Why should I keep people away? I'm getting acquainted with Aunt Qin again.

The unit works overtime. I said, don't go back for dinner, just order a takeaway. An hour later, my colleague said, Xu Li, your mother quarreled with the security guard downstairs. I ran downstairs. Aunt Qin is carrying a stainless steel thermos. When she saw me, she said to the security guard, I'm not lying. I really deliver meals to children.

That's a pot of red ginseng chicken soup.

Half a month. Aunt Qin delivers meals every day. It's still hot every time I eat it in my mouth. I told her there was no need to go to so much trouble. She smiled and did nothing. There is a through train. Colleagues said, Xu Li, your mother dotes on you too much. I said, she's not my mother, she's just my nanny, and everyone is surprised.

Learn to heal yourself in her love.

Xiao Ran came back to pack.

His new girlfriend is sitting on the sofa in the living room. My whole body is full of blood, my fist is clenched tightly, and I don't know when it will explode. Aunt Qin dragged me into the study and solemnly said, since a relationship is over, let everyone live like individuals.

Aunt Qin and I went downstairs and said, close the door when we leave. I noticed the surprise in Xiao Ran's eyes. He must have thought I would cry and make trouble, but I let him down. I think I did a great job and even worshipped myself. However, I cried. Aunt Qin patted my back and cried. Cry.

That night, Aunt Qin walked with me for a long time. I'm in the front and she's in the back. I said, you go back first, I want to be alone. She answered. After walking for a long time, I turned my head and saw a familiar shadow hidden in the darkness.

I began to get busy. Passing by a gym, Aunt Qin insisted that I go and have a look. A fitness man playing dumbbells suddenly smiled at me. That night, I was successfully transferred to the gym by Aunt Qin. Aerobic exercise three times a week.

Aunt Qin taught me how to make a pig's frozen elbow, and I made up an open coat with dignity. The peony planted on the balcony sprouted, and I raised a cup of vines. Fitness men often invite me to dinner, but I have no time.

I signed up for a German class. Often after supper, I ride my bike to the training center. My German teacher is a handsome German with blue eyes. He said, Lily, you are always full of energy.

Half a year passed quickly. One day at noon, I had dinner with Aunt Qin. Aunt Qin spent half a day in the toilet on the road. Come out again, her face is extremely poor. I took her to the hospital, but she refused to be examined. She is getting weaker and weaker, just facing me, she always smiles warmly.

Two months later, she said, I'm going back to Nanjing, and my daughter has something to do. A few days before she left, it was golden autumn in October, but she tore down all my winters and cleaned all the corners of my house. She chose a beautiful set of tableware for me in the shopping center. She said that the peach blossoms on this porcelain plate are beautiful and pleasing to the eye. I took her to the railway station. The crowd surged in the waiting room. She touched my face and her eyes were full of sadness. She said, son, you are finally reassuring. Before leaving, she stuffed me with a velvet box.

This is our last time.

Everything is the best ending.

Four months later. Mother called and Aunt Qin passed away. The news is a bit sudden. What my mother wanted to say was interrupted by me. I said, mom, you should take care of yourself. You are my forever mother. Finally, mother was silent. Actually, I know what my mother is going to tell me.

Aunt Qin is my biological mother.

She went to the company to deliver meals to me. Colleagues said, Xu Li, your nanny is just like you. That day, I stood in front of the mirror in the bathroom and saw my slender eyebrow eyes and high nose bridge, clearly showing the youthful appearance of Aunt Qin, and my tears welled up. When I was 0/7 years old, I found an adoption note in the drawer at home. I turned out to be an abandoned baby. In all these years, I have never mentioned it because it is not important.

The velvet box contains an emerald bracelet, sapphire and crystal clear. Used to wear it on Aunt Qin's wrist. All this time, I didn't call my aunt A Qin. Because, I know, this is not what we need. Every mother comes to her abandoned child, not for recognition, but for compensation and inner peace.

So, in that bad relationship, I finally kept my elegance. I don't want her to worry about me. I took the initiative to learn cooking to reassure her that I would take care of myself even if I was alone in the future. I went to get a fitness card to make her think that I am a person who loves life.

Fortunately, my efforts made her laugh for a long time. And these initial deliberate actions have gradually changed me. I really climbed out of that black hole. But I still owe her.-Mom.

I remember she once told me that I actually had a daughter, but now she is gone. I looked her in the eye and said, it's okay. You can treat me as your daughter in the future. At that time, she cried, and there were tears on the back of her hand.

I think this ending is very good, very good!

Finishing: zhl20 1609