2. If a friend who chats well with you online suddenly ignores you, you should reflect: Are you taking a selfie online?
People who lose weight must not add any weight loss groups. On the surface, they can encourage each other, but it is useless. If you are not the fattest, you will relax because someone is at the bottom.
4. Modern women have three obedience and four virtues: three obedience, never gentleness, never thoughtfulness and never reason; Fourth, say no, fight no, scold no, and provoke no.
5. Selling cute should also be divided into people. Only good-looking people can sell cute, and ugly people can only pretend to be crazy and sell silly.
6. The boss said at the meeting that the year-end bonus may be as high as 5 million this year. We cheered, unbelievable. Later, each of us received a lottery ticket, up to 5 million!
7. Life never makes me comfortable. It always slaps me every once in a while to remind me to make another mistake and die in ignorance.
8. If you have a fever at home, you will stick to surfing the Internet. If you sneeze at school, you will think it is terminal cancer.
My daughter-in-law lay quietly in my arms and asked, I have been married for more than a year. What are my shortcomings? I sincerely said: only one person has a little temper ... "What! Where did you say my temper exploded? "
10. If you are busy recently, don't panic. After this busy period, you can move on to the next paragraph.
1 1. Whenever a friend complains to me about the troubles of life, I always recall my own experience and say earnestly, "Ha ha ha ha ha ..."
Twelve. My brother was very stupid when he was a child. Grandpa taught him to count, but he couldn't remember. Grandpa slapped him angrily: "I can't learn to count." What can I do when I grow up? " My brother said with tears in his eyes, "I am a shepherd." Grandpa: "herding sheep? You don't even know if the sheep is lost. " Brother: "I'll put one."
13. I was moved by my girlfriend again. I accompanied her to have an abortion today. She said to me weakly in the hospital bed: honey, it's not your child, I don't want it!
Fourteen. I was really happy when I was a child. Nobody cares that you are poor, and you don't know that you are ugly. You have no money and no partner, but you are still happy every day.
Fifteen. The tortoise is hurt. Let snails buy medicine. Two hours later. The snail hasn't come back yet. The tortoise was in a hurry and scolded, if the son of a bitch doesn't come back, I'll die! At this moment, the snail's voice came from outside the door: you little bastard, I won't go anyway!
Sixteen years old. When I was a child, I always heard people say to me, "It doesn't matter if you don't look good now, but you will look good when you grow up in a few years." Ten years later, I didn't grow up, but I wanted to.
17. Your economy is poor, your personality is inconsistent, your hobbies are colorful, and your life beliefs are in a mess. Everything written on it is inseparable!
18. A friend and colleague drank too much and got into a fight, with injuries all over their faces. The next day, they woke up and regretted it. The friend felt guilty, so he drank a glass of wine and apologized. As a result, they got drunk again and started fighting again. Can you still have fun?
19. downstairs in the community, I doodled on a Geely car with a marker, and the owner hit me. Owner: "What do you draw?" Me: "Nothing, just good luck."
20. I asked a child to dance, and he said weakly, "I can't." I said, "Boys should be confident and bold". As a result, he shouted, "I won't." 2 1. quarrel with your girlfriend. My girlfriend shouted loudly, "Even if you buy me the lipstick I saw last time and the bag I have been longing for for for a long time, I won't forgive you!" " I got the message and quickly coaxed her: "Don't worry, I won't buy it!" " "
22. reflect on yourself. If you look like a selfie, how can you not have a boyfriend?
Twenty-three I have a dream since I was a child: to wear sunglasses, drive a Lamborghini sports car and go home in clothes. Now I have realized half my dream and have sunglasses.
Twenty-four Old and unmarried, my mother looks at me everywhere. I brought her a cup of milk tea when I went out, and as soon as I handed it to her, I began to growl, "I said you burned too much money, didn't I?" How much can you earn? " I quickly explained that the second cup was half price and cheap. Now, my mother is even more angry: "Why do you want to leave me the discounted bargains?"