Someone just asked me what brand of lipstick I was wearing on my mouth. I'll show her the way, go straight ahead, turn left at the first crossing, and remember to tell the boss to put more peppers.
I 16 years old, I haven't had my period yet, and I'm too shy to ask my parents. A few days ago, a person secretly went to the hospital for examination. The doctor said that boys won't have their period!
I went to the school hospital for the first time because I had a fever. The doctor and aunt handed me a thermometer without saying anything, and I put it in my mouth without saying anything. My aunt looked at me and said softly, "It's under my arm." I thought about it, but I cried out obediently: "Yeah!"
I didn't have criteria for choosing a spouse until I met you, and I told myself that I couldn't get it.
Don't ask me why I did so badly in the exam. I'm hiding my power. Have you ever seen the landlord blow it up when he comes?
7. Someone asked me which is better, the lion or the tiger. I don't think a perm is as good as a tattoo.
8. When I was a child, I raised one hundred yuan to buy a car. The boss said my money was fake. Nonsense, of course it's fake, and your car is not real.
9. Others stay in bed because they have money. They can stay up as late as they want. I stay in bed because I have no money, so I can save a meal.
10. The leader said to me, Xiao Zhang, you are an adult. Even if you are unhappy, don't write your real thoughts on your face, okay? No one is blind, everyone can see them. I think what he said is really reasonable, so I washed the word "annoying" off my face the next day.
1 1. "My neighbor has become calculating." "Speak human words!" "He changed the WIFI password."
12. The moment you get serious, it's a bit like a roadside movie.
13. When taking a bus to the service area in expressway, the driver shouted, "Go to the toilet quickly and get ready in advance!" Next to the buddy, a weak question: "How do we prepare in advance? Do you want to take off your pants now?
14. When I went to the school cafeteria to eat, I found that the ribs were not very fresh, so I went to the chef and said, "Master, I found that the ribs this week were not as delicious as last week." The master said, "nonsense, this is last week's ribs."
15. Tutor: "What makes you walk on the stage of good voice?" Player: "It's my leg ..."
16. "Son, remember not to marry your wife and forget your mother in the future." "Don't worry, Mom, I will always be a mom."
17. My friend said that I have a double chin, which is caused by frequent brushing of my mobile phone. Since then, every time I brush my mobile phone, I always look up. Unexpectedly, a month later, I had a tattoo on my head.
18. "With my face value, if in ancient times, I could support the whole brothel!" "You mean you look like a pillar?"
19. I called the police as soon as my wife disappeared. The policeman said to me, calm down first. You can't take notes if you keep laughing like that.
20. I drank a cup of espresso at Starbucks in the evening, and now I can't sleep. Old and expensive, it hurts to think about it.
2 1. Everyone's life is a book, others' is a happy life, and mine is a complete collection of jokes.
22. Please recommend a sports car with a price of over 4 million. It starts fast, is comfortable enough and looks good. The more expensive, the better. I want to change the wallpaper of my mobile phone.
23. When we were young, we were all very happy, because at that time, we were ugly and poor.
24. I went to buy water, and the boss said two yuan. I said the suggested retail price is1.a bottle of 5 yuan. The boss said, "I don't accept his suggestion!" " "