The thinking and logic are very clear and useful. This rule also applies to the last days after class. When you don't want to get up, tell yourself 5432 1 get up, and you will get up after a while. Shielding your emotions and feelings can really move quickly.

I am a very serious procrastinator. I often put things off until I can put them off any longer, so the 5-second rule is really practical and can be used in all aspects of my life. Let's review the course content:

Hello, I'm Tan Tan, and tonight I'm going to share with you the five-second rule, one of the actions.

As you know, I used to be a designer, and I like to participate in many designers' exchange activities. Then I met a lot of people. One of them is Ms. Shi, who runs an upscale club in Suzhou. Ms. Shi told me something. She said she wanted to change suppliers. So I made several appointments online. I have an appointment with A. A said he was on a business trip, and Ms. Josh will see you in two days. B also made a quick appointment with Ms. Shi to meet the next day. Knowing Ms. Shi's needs, C said to Ms. Shi:

I'll make a proposal now and send it to your email 1 hour later. Do you think today is convenient for you? I'll come to see you if it's convenient. Who do you think Ms. Shi finally cooperated with? Why? Because he is very mobile, right?

I am compassionate: one has needs and the other meets them.

Tan Tan:

Yes, it makes Ms. Shi feel valued. Then, let me ask you about your work and life. Are there any projects that are nearing deadline, but more than half of them are still unfinished? Plans are always anticlimactic, right? Can't you get up in the morning, especially in winter? I used to be like this.

Before, Mr. Lu Jia explained the movie "Mr. Nice guy" to everyone. I also let you review today. Then, I want to ask you, why did Carl freeze himself? Don't want to get together with friends? Why did his life change dramatically before and after he said yes?

Is there something you really want to do in your life? There are some things you really want, but because of entanglement, hesitation and hesitation. It was delayed. Then I ran away. I may never do it again. I don't want what I want. I don't think I need it anymore.

It has been two weeks since our sixth training camp. Many students can already see their own problems and reasons. But it is always repeated and cannot be broken. Why is this?

Will the problem be solved if we don't take action?

John Maxwell, an American writer, said, "You will never change your life unless you first change what you do every day. The secret of success is that what you do every day must be successful. "

I asked you a question before class. What do you want? Thinking without analysis is your most direct and original idea. There are many answers. About happiness, money, marriage, family, inner strength and so on. .. well, now think about what you want. Will you act for what you want? From now on. Will it start to struggle? Will you start to hesitate? Will you find reasons for yourself? You will convince yourself: give up, can't you do it? Yes, I've done it before.

Therefore, thinking is the level of thinking. We can want many things. In an instant, you can think of many things you want. But to do it, it is the level of action and the level of the body.

Mel, the inventor of the 5-second rule, said in a ted talk: Mel said: How do you get what you want? Getting what you want is actually very simple.

Attention is simple, not easy.

In the bookstore, you can buy at least 10 books to tell you what to do. Search online, and you can find a lot. We play Weibo, and many people are recording what they are doing step by step. Will you follow in their footsteps? Because someone else has already done it. I believe many people won't do it.

So, what is holding us back? Let me ask you one more question. When you meet a friend you haven't seen for a long time, when you usually say hello, others ask you, how are you doing now? What do we usually answer? Yes, usually. I'm fine. Is it? Yeah, not bad. Not bad. We all know this word. However, will you say this word to yourself? Is this the real you? This word doesn't sound smart and can't express your true feelings. Yes, polite language. Are you really good? Is it really good? As before, I often suffer from insomnia and anxiety. I'd better tell others that I'm fine. So, my friends don't know that I have a problem. Later, when I accepted myself, I said my bad side. They were all very surprised.

Lack of concentration, low work efficiency, always procrastinating and long working hours. Are you gonna be okay?

Always quarreling with the object, the child is disobedient. How are you?

Yes, but we usually tell others, even ourselves. I'm fine!

I'm fine. What does this word mean?

It means you don't have to change at all. You can do it as long as you follow the current trajectory.

Yes, self-deception.

The doctor said, why is fortune telling accurate?

It is because, when your pattern comes out, if you don't change it, you will keep going along this pattern, and your results have already been presented.

And someone's life is uncertain, because his model will change.

When we say, "I'm fine". Actually, what I want in my heart I have convinced myself that it doesn't matter without him.

Then how should we treat ourselves correctly?

If you are good, you are good. If you are a bad person, you are a bad person. You are excellent, just excellent.

Look at your own advantages and disadvantages correctly.

A few days ago, Teacher Lu Jia said that we should face up to our own shortcomings and make good use of our longboards. Your own bad places, to face and act.

The second point. Just some people. I know I have a problem.

Tell another little story:

I have a friend who has a particularly bad relationship with her husband and has reached the point of hatred. She told me that if he didn't take money home every month, I didn't need him at all. Ever since I touched my heart. She told me all the problems in her life. Then I will also use my ability to help her solve the analysis. Help her find the reason, find the pattern. She knows the reason and the law, but she can't. For example, her husband is a space designer. She has always wanted her husband to start a business, but it is difficult for a technician to talk about business. She doesn't want to help herself. She has been complaining, complaining and forcing her husband.

She can't accept it. She didn't see the truth clearly. I asked her to go to class. There was a free place before, and I planned to give it to her. That's right. Her thinking is very unclear, she can't see the facts clearly, and she doesn't admit or accept them. At first she said yes. But when I heard that I was going to recover, I didn't tell her to train and do her homework every day. She gave up. She doesn't want to study. And now, you ask me the answer every time. Do you think when she doesn't think clearly and doesn't know what she wants? Does she want answers from others? Even if you give her thousands of answers, it's not what she wants.

Is such a person a representative of China's weak culture?

Wait, shit, help.

Don't take the initiative, don't act, just wait for someone else to answer, or make a big move. Let her change overnight.

Tan Tan Heidi:

Yes, the above two reasons are the two biggest reasons that prevent us from getting what we want. If we can see our own problems. Willing to take the initiative. But why is it always repeated? Or have you been dragging your feet?

Liu Jiaxing:

Weak culture is poison.

Tan Tan Heidi:

The word poison is too good to describe.

So, here is a rule, that is, the five-second rule. He can make us break through the freeze and let us stop evading and procrastinating.

The five-second rule is simple.

Here is a brief introduction to the inventor of the 5-second rule. There is a middle-aged woman named Mel Robbins. She has no job. Take care of children's daily life and send them to school every day. Life is repetitive and monotonous. She feels that her life is very unsatisfactory. But not because she has no job, but because she can't get up every morning. Always stay in bed. Therefore, it is often too late to make breakfast, and the children's clothes are in a mess. I often miss the school bus. She felt ashamed and regretful. I feel hopeless. And then one day. She suddenly saw an advertisement on TV. A rocket ready for countdown has been launched.

5, 4, 3, 2, 1 launch! Then the rocket ignited and the rocket soared into the sky. Then she got up in this way. For the first time, she felt lucky. As a result, for many days. Every time you use this method, you can succeed. Since then, she has never been in bed again. Keep the house tidy.

This is the five-second rule. . Simple. .

Then, she applies this rule to other aspects when she doesn't want to write articles or exercise.

She counted to five in her mind and then started to act at once. After that. She changed from a procrastinator to a veritable winner in life. She stepped onto the ted stage. She published a best-seller about the five-second rule and became a famous best-seller in America.

Have you heard of the five-second rule before?

I heard it when I was a stranger. But I didn't take action Because I think it's too simple and has no technical content at all. But when I understood his principles. Then try to do it. I think it is amazing.

Teacher Lu Jia has been using this method. She is very mobile.

Procrastination is a century-long problem. There are many books and methods to solve procrastination. There are also many societies and communities that hold groups to keep warm. Trying to beat procrastination. But there is no way, there is a five-second rule, and this seemingly simple and rude method is effective. Why?

Next, I will talk about the principle of the five-second rule.

I asked everyone at the beginning, what do you want? Most people answered what they wanted, but they couldn't do it for various reasons. Still not doing it for the time being. And then slowly. I gave up.

So, we put forward the demand. Did you take action? Why put forward the demand, but did not act?

Between your needs and actions, between your feelings.

So, as I said just now, your needs and your actions are separated by your feelings. This feeling is our mood. It's our inner play.

Too much inner drama, and finally gave up. Fear of rejection, fear, etc.

For example, we stay in bed in the morning. What is the root cause?

It is this feeling of "I don't want to get up" that determines our bedridden behavior. Emotions are also right.

Both the doctor and Mr. Lu Jia said it before. Action can change the structure of our brain.

Why do you lie down and play with your mobile phone? Is it because of comfort or feeling?

Action can also change our thinking mode. As soon as the action comes into being, we will gain some experience in it.

Then, the energy will also be improved. Self-confidence will also increase.

Eventually it will move towards a positive cycle, so the force will be bigger and bigger.

Let's look back at Carl in Mr. Nice guy.

When he started to freeze, was there too much drama in his heart? Worried that marriage failure will make everyone laugh and make them embarrassed to see their ex-wife. So I began to doubt myself, deny myself and finally wrapped myself up. He doesn't need friendship or the joy of life. Did he force him to act immediately when he said yes later? Don't give him any time to think. Don't give him time to play inside. When you have a need, act immediately. No entanglement, no hesitation. So his life has changed a lot. Energy has also improved.

In life, when you are afraid, you worry that others will laugh at you and feel unwelcome. When you are struggling to deny yourself. What should I do? Is action.

Will it be delayed? Will you find an excuse to escape? Will these inner plays make you lose your motivation? The result is nothing. . .

So ... the five-second rule. Is to block your feelings when your needs appear. Connect your needs directly with your actions. Just like Carl said in the movie.

This step is called "taking back control of yourself"

According to scholars' research, one of the best ways to overcome procrastination is to create a so-called "initiation ceremony". We say that life should have a sense of ceremony, just as there will be many festivals in China. If we do things with a sense of ceremony, we will get into the role better.

When you start procrastinating, through this ceremony, you can stop procrastinating and regain control of yourself.

The five-second rule is a perfect launching ceremony.

It will stimulate the prefrontal cortex of your brain. That is, the part of the brain responsible for action and concentration, which urges you to take action.

Everyone says that the five-second rule seems simple, but the principle is not surprising.

Next, I will talk about the benefits of the five-second rule. For example, in the winter morning, let you leave the warm bed. Will it be easier for everyone to go out to a cold space or let you go out for a run? When you watch a comfortable movie and lie on the sofa. That's great. Someone rang the doorbell. If you want to open the door, will you get up But I have to stand up again, I have to stand up.

At this time, you need a lot of energy to change your behavior. Stand up, or stand up. Right?

This energy is the activation energy. The physical strength and energy needed to change your behavior. Is the activation energy.

For example, do people who want to lose weight like dieting? When you look at a table of delicious food, everyone is enjoying it. At this time you need to control yourself, eat less, eat less, eat less. Does this process of controlling yourself require energy?

This energy is the activation energy.

Sometimes, if you want to change your original state, you need a lot of starting energy, so many things can't be done without enough psychological energy. In life, there are too many places that need activation energy. You can just give hundreds or thousands of examples.

Mihali Chickensmiha, a famous psychologist, suggested that in daily work and life, we should consciously reduce the activation energy of good habits and increase the activation energy of those bad habits.

For example, if you really want to cultivate the habit of reading more, put the bookshelf as close to the sofa as possible, preferably lying on the sofa. Otherwise, you still have to get up, go to the study and come back with the book. The starting energy required is too large, and it is not easy for you to overcome the resistance.

On the other hand, if you want to watch TV as little as possible, you should put the TV as far away from the sofa as possible. Or get out of the TV. This is more complicated. For example, if you put the remote control in a relatively high place, you need to stand on the bench to take it off. This increases the resistance of this action.

The five-second rule works for us because his "starting ceremony" is actually providing us with extra starting energy.

Break the resistance and start action. Between our needs and actions, there should be needs, so just do it. But because of our feelings and emotions, we complicate the relationship between needs and actions. For example, I am tired, sleepy and not in the mood. I want to play for a while. I'm not well. ...

Let's talk about a knowledge point. Do you like to drive automatically or brake suddenly when driving?

On both sides of our brain, one side is automatic driving and the other is emergency braking. When we are doing something unusual, our brain will suddenly brake. What do you think when you walk into the kitchen and see a lot of dishes to be washed?

You will start the emergency brake: I will put these bowls here and let them wash themselves. But this is not what you usually do. Your brain will immediately brake again. Return to automatic mode. You will go back to automatic mode and take it down to wash these dishes. It's just that I get angry.

So when we do something unusual. The brain will suddenly brake.

Why are people trapped in life? If you don't want to break, you have to rely on others.

How does your body feel when you are hungry or thirsty? Don't want to move, uncomfortable.

Yes, there is no energy. Just want to eat, right?

So, when you are in trouble and dissatisfied with life. In fact, this is a signal. One of your most basic needs has not been met. Need to explore.

Many people, feeling bored, will complain. But will you find another job? Many people don't, they just scold this job.

Therefore, what we have to do is to leave behind our minds, our thinking, our actions and our physical needs.

Don't care about your emotions, care about what you want.

If you don't act in five seconds, then your emergency braking system. It will stop you. No more action.

So the five-second rule is to prevent your emergency braking system from starting to operate.

The question is not the idea itself, but whether to act or not. If you don't move, many ideas are just one idea. Will be overwhelmed by all kinds of emotions.

Then, no then. Go back to the original trajectory and calculate the exact life.

No one told us after we 18. Self-discipline is your responsibility. Self-discipline means doing what you don't want to do.

So, you are so busy, do you have to wait until you like it? Never wait.

Therefore, after mastering the emotion for two seconds, let yourself enter the next stage immediately, that is action.

In the last sentence, getting what you want is actually very simple, but it is not easy. You must let yourself lose your mind and act.

This is the end of today's class. . Thank you for your company. [Ross] [Ross] [Ross]