After class, the teacher said, what else do you not understand? I stretched myself and said, what class does the teacher have this time?
Doesn't affect you? I will cremate you.
Beggar: Sister-in-law, I haven't eaten for two days. Can I have some cake? Sister-in-law: Cake? I only have rice here. Beggar: Forget it if it's normal, but today is my birthday!
It is said that sandstorms have blown to Taiwan Province province. Many old people took to the streets, spread out their hands, looked up at the sky at 45 degrees, burst into tears, took a deep breath and said excitedly, 60 years, 60 years, and finally smelled the soil in their hometown.
W: I want to find a boyfriend. M: Let me help you. There is a good one in our dormitory. Woman: Aren't you distressed that I am with him? . Man: Think too much? Don't worry, I have nothing to do with him.
Learn not to be angry first, and then learn to make people angry. Recommend the funniest diary.
Confucius said: In a threesome, there must be my wife. Choose a beautiful one to marry.
Old people can't fight, children can't fight, women can't fight, and men fight to death.
If cutting my hair is cutting my memory, will I lose my memory if I cut my hair?
How are you getting along now? If you have a bad life, I will feel at ease.
Menstruation is not only the pain of women, but also the pain of men.
When I grow up, I want to marry Tang Yan as my husband. If I can play, I will. If I can't, I'll eat him.
On a crowded bus, a girl suddenly shouted, "Stop crowding!" Stop squeezing! Squeeze all the milk out! She is holding yogurt.
Did you get vomited three times after you were born, but only got caught twice?
Some people, when making masks, look much better than real people.
Know you well? Just play a video if it's okay. Think of it as your TV, and it will pop up when you press it.
Pleasant goat is very similar to Journey to the West. Catch every episode, but never eat it.
Looking back now, I feel that there will be a big wave of zombies coming in soon, but I haven't even planted sunflowers yet.
There is no cow dung in the end of the world, so why unrequited love for a lump of shit?
Some people are so tender that they come out as soon as they pinch, but I am so timid that I bubble when I pinch my nose.
Sorry, there is no gender suitable for you in the public toilet.
Modern women are obedient and virtuous. Three obedience, never gentle, never considerate, never reasonable. Four virtues, say no, fight no, scold no, and provoke no.
I am a very principled person. My principle is only three words, depending on the mood.
Don't talk to me about life. You weren't born.
I have been ill for several days since you confessed to me last time. Please stop!
I have been suffering from insomnia recently. I wake up every 16 hours.
A tree will die if it is not skinned; People are shameless and invincible in the world.
The farmer's three punches hurt a little.
Uncle, sign my name in the spouse column for me!
Everyone says I'm ugly, but I'm handsome!
Funny talk: women in the new century: get into the hall, get out of the kitchen, write code, find anomalies, kill Trojan horses, climb over the fence, drive a good car, afford a new house, fight for mistresses and beat hooligans.
Please tell the prince that I am still on a difficult road, and there are snow-capped mountains, rivers, dragons and handsome guys. Tell him to go back to sleep
When I love you, I am what you say. What do you think you are when I don't love you?
To be a man, you must be a person who wanders between cow A and cow C.
My big name is God, my small name is Jesus, my English name is God, and my dharma name is Tathagata.
You can't hang yourself from a tree. Try to die several times in several nearby trees.
If one day, you love someone as much as I love you. You will know how tired I am.
Self-sufficiency from beginning to end, self-contempt, self-entertainment, self-pity, self-satisfaction, self-guidance and self-destruction.
I don't do what I regret, I only do what you regret.
The price of graves has gone up so fast that I can't afford to die.
I have passed a person countless times, and my clothes were all scratched without any spark.
I'm sleepy most of the time, and occasionally I make a bitch.
Hee hee and haha are good friends, very good friends. One day, haha died. Hee hee is very sad. He went to Haha's grave and said, Haha, you are dead.
Now, please take out the tape and turn to side B to continue listening.
Two tigers, two tigers, falling in love, falling in love, all men, all men, really abnormal, really abnormal.
Analysis of Nongfu Spring Advertising Language
The top of the mountain is the source of water. The water in the human body changes every day. We don't produce water, we are just porters of nature! Natural weak alkaline water, Nongfu Spring.
Make tea with your heart, good water and good tea, and good people drink it.
Nongfu Spring is a little sweet.
Every time you drink a bottle of Nongfu Spring, you donate a penny to the children in poor mountainous areas.
Water is the mother of tea and the water for making tea.
My beautiful water has been cared for.
Nongfu Spring is a little sweet.
Drinking a little every day is healthier.
A healthy new life begins with drinking rocks and springs.
Mountain spring is the best, farm tea.
Take a sip and enjoy it.
Drink fashion, xxx, healthy holy water.
High quality natural mineral water.
The milk of the earth raised a generation of children.
Looking for running water in the mountains, friends are on earth.
Every time you drink a bottle of Nongfu Spring, you donate a penny to the children in poor mountainous areas.
Oriental divine water, xxx supreme.
Longmen springs, mountains and rivers smell good!
Yunnan mountain spring has a sweet aftertaste.
Deep underground, drinking is the taste.
Your healthy life, your rock spring. Yanquan, live a healthy life every day.
Water is the mother of tea and the water for making tea.
Fortunately, nature, your quality.
We don't produce water, we are just porters of nature.
Make tea with your heart, good water and good tea, and good people drink it.
The top of the mountain is the source of water.
For the sake of health, drink a good amount of water!
Well water is the bottom and river water is the middle.
Make tea with good water.
Mountain spring is the best, farm tea.
Appreciation of Nongfu Spring Advertisement
Whenever I see the word Nongfu Spring, the first thing I think of is the wonderful slogan that Nongfu Spring is a little sweet. An interesting TV advertisement in Nongfu Spring mentioned this slogan: In a rural school, when the teacher was writing on the blackboard, naughty students couldn't help drinking Nongfu Spring. The banging of the bottle cap made the teacher very angry and said, Please don't make such a noise in class. After class, the teacher praised Nongfu Spring while drinking: Nongfu Spring is a little sweet. With the classroom advertisements broadcast on CCTV since mid-April, the sweet voice of Nongfu Spring flew over Qian Shan and spread all over the country, and the brand awareness quickly started. The advertisement was also rated as 1999' s best advertising slogan by people's daily and other news media. There is a word in Chinese called "Ganquan", which means sweet water. The water of Nongfu Spring comes from Qiandao Lake, which is spring water collected from many mountains. After the self-purification of Qiandao Lake, it can be said to be a sweet spring, so Nongfu Spring is a selling point. A little sweet. Taking taste commitment as a differentiated appeal, which implies the high quality of water source, Nongfu Spring has formed an overall strategy of perceptual preference and rational identification, and has also successfully established a memory point for Nongfu Spring.
According to this advertisement, it is not difficult to see that Nongfu Spring has created remarkable differences and established its own personality. While other similar products are showing their hygiene, high technology and fashion, Nongfu Spring is unconventional and unique. It only pays light attention to the taste of the product, but it is a little sweet, which makes consumers feel refreshed in front of the TV. It is difficult for consumers to forget such products. An advertisement can do this.
Why is Nongfu Spring advertisement positioned as a little sweet, instead of focusing on 27 layers of purification like Robust advertisement? This is the essence of Nongfu Spring advertisement. First of all, Nongfu Spring made an in-depth analysis of pure water and found that there are great problems in pure water. The problem lies in purity: there are no trace elements needed by human body, which violates the essence of harmonious coexistence between man and nature and does not meet the needs of consumers. This weakness was caught by Nongfu Spring. As natural water, it naturally holds high the banner against pure water, and it is revealing such information to consumers through a little sweetness: I am a natural and healthy Nongfu Spring. A brand of natural water, pollution-free, trace elements, if compared with pure water, the price difference is not big. It is conceivable that every consumer will make a rational choice.
But the fact is that Nongfu Spring has no advantage in sweetness, because all pure water and mineral water are a little sweet when carefully tasted. Nongfu Spring first put forward a somewhat sweet concept, which seized the psychological commanding heights of consumers. Its thinking speed is amazing.
Similarly, consumers are only willing and able to remember simple information. The simpler the better, the simpler and the easiest to remember. Nongfu Spring can't hide its extraordinary wisdom at this point. It only uses three words, which is a little sweet and simple, but the real point is just a sweet word, full of sensibility. It describes a taste. Everyone will have a direct feeling when they touch this word, which undoubtedly plays a great role in strengthening memory. It is hard to forget that Nongfu Spring is a little sweet, but it is hard to remember Nongfu Spring. Nongfu Spring is to win by simplicity, so that you can express yourself easily. Simple and convenient for consumers to remember.
In line with the characteristics of products, highlighting the excellent quality of products. Nongfu Spring is a little sweet and impeccable. Nongfu Spring is taken from the deep water 70 meters below Qiandao Lake and belongs to the national first-class water source protection zone. The water quality is pure, and it will feel sweet after drinking. Just like this, it is very appropriate to describe it as a little sweet, because it conforms to the characteristics of the product; It is more exquisite, because it highlights the excellent quality of the products.
For consumers, make them feel good. A little sweetness undoubtedly makes people feel beautiful. Sweetness means sweetness, happiness and happiness, which is the lifelong pursuit of China people. Such China people will definitely pursue products that feel sweet. Nongfu Spring firmly grasped this point and said to China people, I am a little sweet. This is equivalent to saying: I am your pursuit. As a slogan, this is more equivalent to saying: please pursue me. This is a temptation that is hard to resist. Nongfu Spring uses temptation to win the purchasing power of consumers.
Nongfu Spring has not forgotten to be linked with social welfare activities, and it has occupied consumers' psychology even more.
In addition, the communication strategy of Nongfu Spring in 2008 is extremely clear and simple.
After the concept is clear, it is necessary to convey it with simple and powerful ideas:
Minimalist background, a glass of water, pouring water and changing water.
The water in the human body should be changed every 18 days.
Water quality determines the quality of life.
The photos are printed from the real Qiandao Lake scenery to the bottle label of Nongfu Spring.
We don't produce water, we are just porters of nature.
This view, beyond the conventional thinking of consumers, is concise, powerful and rich in connotation.
This advertisement perfectly combines the construction and filling of the water source that Nongfu Spring has been spreading before, and gives a brand-new explanation. Nongfu Spring is healthy natural water, not produced and processed, nor produced by subsequent artificial minerals. The differentiation strategy has opened the distance between Nongfu Spring and its competitors.
The porter of nature, Nongfu Spring is the person who brings you the essence of nature. This is even more worthy of thanks.
Quiet and concise pictures, in the current colorful and confusing environment of advertising, are more quality and unique, and have received another kind of attention and recognition.
Advertising caters to consumers' demands for health and safety, and conveys the natural product attributes of Nongfu Spring to consumers, which distinguishes Nongfu Spring from other brands. Established a good corporate image of Nongfu Spring. This advertisement began in 20xx, and Master Kong mineral water was exposed from tap water. The broadcast of this advertisement is quite a bit of a slap in the face.
This advertisement of Nongfu Spring can be said to be very simple, but the effect is very good. Why? Because it pays great attention to the effect of advertising. Whether advertising creativity can achieve the purpose of promotion basically depends on the communication efficiency of advertising information, which is the principle of effectiveness of advertising creativity. The advertisement of nature porters in Nongfu Spring attaches great importance to the practicality of advertisements by imparting health knowledge.
Kind of funny. Tell me about it.
1, dreaming, anything is possible. 2, you come back quickly, I can't fool alone!
3, love me, you say, how bumpy it is to put it in your heart.
4, come out to mix, my wife will change sooner or later!
5, acne is nothing, that is your lovely bubble.
6. Talking about money doesn't hurt feelings, but talking about love hurts money the most.
7. You are a pig, I am a dog, and we are friends of pigs and dogs.
8. Don't play with me, or I'll play along.
9, salary is like a holiday, you will be dumbfounded if you don't come in January.
10, the color of the money in your pocket determines your mood today.
Please curl up in a soft posture and go out.
12, how lucky I am to know you.
13, if you use the honey trap, I'll play along.
14, there are thousands of men in Qian Qian, and I have to change them every day.
15, in fact, I am a genius, but unfortunately I am jealous of talents!
16, are you tired? Just tired. Comfort is for the dead.
17, don't show off your IQ by a quarter.
18, my future son, tell me your father's direction quickly.
19, the only feeling I have for you now is nothing.
20, we must firmly believe that as long as we are alive, we will definitely meet delicious food.
2 1. My mother taught me since I was a child that there is no limit to learning, and it is time to turn back.
The simple thing is that I miss you, but the difficult thing is that we are not together.
Even if the world ends, you won't come back to me.
24. I have never met a boy I like, so I can only pretend to be heterosexual first.
25. If you really want to find me, why can't I reply to you?
26. God gave me the task of riding a pig for a walk.
27, marriage enlightenment, as long as he is good to me, even if he is handsome!
28. Love has only two endings, either taking different routes or taking the same route.
Without those stupid women, life would be more stupid.
It is said that we are the flowers of the motherland. Why am I the one who gets hurt?
3 1, I just bought clothes, and I don't want to take them off, whether I wash them or not.
32. When men and women flirt, the most striking Chinese character is born: bump.
I thought I was decadent, and I didn't know that my morning paper was scrapped until today.
34. Teacher, just say which parent you like, and don't always hold parent-teacher conferences.
35. We are all dreamers. When dreams are gone, only the dreamer is still there.
36. During the day, the night is pressed on the bed, and the sun is born.
37, so shameless, so heartless, your weight should be very light, right
I hope that when I play ball, you will be there to cheer for me and wipe my sweat.
39. Behind every successful Altman, there is a little monster who is beaten silently.
40. Not everyone can keep a low profile. The basis of keeping a low profile is to keep a high profile at all times.
4 1, don't keep saying that my face is beautiful and ugly.
42. Be a temperamental troll, a layered pervert and a knowledgeable illiterate!
43. Why are you so dark and I play in the dark? Not as ugly as you.
44. I know that love needs freedom to be happy; I'd rather be with you and go with you.
45. When my hair reaches my waist, I will cover my body fat. You should be cold and arrogant, even if you are a tiger's back.
46. I think the brightest smile in my life is probably dedicated to my mobile phone screen.
47. I thought I was a flower on the cliff, but later I realized that I was just a scum in the sea of people.
48. Now you must look at the object carefully, because there are too many people who are not men and women!
49. I recently read an unforgettable book and benefited a lot. I forgot the title and content.
50. Boys may like to touch girls' heads, but girls touch boys' heads and think: My son has grown up.
5 1, there is an old legend that people who can see beautiful women on XX campus will live forever.
52. If you can be ugly and obscene, others will not like you, and I don't like you either.
53. Taobao shopkeepers introduced the fabric of their clothes: this fabric is full of elasticity, comparable to the elastic surface of Jinmailang.
54. Managing your strengths can add value to your life; Managing your shortcomings will devalue your life.
In fact, when we see the test paper, the teacher's reaction to the answer sheet is the same: what the hell!
56. Teacher, I will swallow your punishment with a smile; And you will punish me with a murderous look on your face.
57. When I want to shake hands with the person I like, I can probably only say: arm-wrestling.
58. Today, someone said I was a handsome boy. I rushed up angrily, another slap in the face. TM, isn't this nonsense?
59. Keep the pain and sadness to yourself, and don't vent your pain by hurting the person you love.
60. I had a dream about you. I am sad. You are eating shit. I tried to persuade you, but you didn't listen and hit me. .
6 1, I thought there would be a vigorous review on National Day, but I got a vigorous make-up homework.
62. There are two kinds of looks, one is good-looking and the other is ugly. You belong in the middle, so ugly.
63. What is the biggest feeling after the English test? I have never known so clearly that I am from China.
64. A teacher asked his students, "Why does the body get cold after death?" A student replied, "It's natural to be calm.
65. Mom: Dad and Mom are quarrelling. Whose side are you on? Son: I'll go away. Don't hurt me!
66. Now you scold me because you don't know me yet. When you get to know me later, you will definitely hit me.
67. There is a woman who is so cute, so cute and so stupid that I really want to hit on her. I just want to walk over and remember that the employer is a woman.
68. I saw a question when the exam collapsed, vaguely remembering what the teacher said, but clearly remembering that I didn't listen at that time.
69. I am a very thrifty person. I never shit with paper, never eat with chopsticks, and never wash my hands!
70. People who used the phrase "Let's talk about it after the Chinese New Year" years ago changed it to "Let's talk about it" after the Chinese New Year. This is just after the New Year.
7 1, if your life span is years, then I hope I can live to the day before my birthday, because then I will have you every day in my life.
72. I took the bus and tried to look out the window like a Korean heroine. The bad road turned me into a concussion.
73. Knowing that you will lose your freedom, knowing that this is a life-long contract, you are willing to make a promise in order to get each other and make them happy.
Dear: On this special day, I can only think of you silently and love you. I just want to tell you: I love you forever, and everything about you is affecting me.
75. Write your name on the palm of your hand. I miss it when I open it, and I am happy when I hold it. In this way, hand in hand to give you a lifetime of tenderness; Just like this, shoulder to shoulder gives you a lifetime of happiness!
76. One day Xiaoming was reading ancient Chinese, and his father asked him what you were doing. Xiao Ming said: Ancient prose (volume). Dad: What? Xiao Ming added: Ancient prose (volume). Then I beat Xiao Ming up.
77. Late at night, Bush saw bin Laden standing in front of his bed, criticizing his head and distributing it. Bush was startled and said, How dare you break into the White House at night! Bin Laden shook his chest-high beard and said with a gloomy smile, Rejoice is so confident!
78. Today, I squatted in the toilet. A male classmate called me and asked me what I was doing. I quickly reply to shit. After three seconds of silence, he said, "Fuck me." I said blankly, no, I'll do it myself
79. The fool stole the beggar's wallet and was seen by the blind. The dumb shouted at me, which startled the deaf. Camels come forward and lame people fly. The wanted man wants to take him to the public security expert bureau. Asako said, look at my face.
80. M: Master, why can't I win her heart for my height and handsomeness of several hundred million dollars? The master handed him a semi-finished bamboo basket. I see, master. Are you telling me not to give up halfway? Master: I'll let you keep making it up. . .
Funny mood phrases with egg pain
1, it doesn't matter if you swallow it, it's better to say fuck gracefully.
2. The object you are pursuing already has an object. Don't be discouraged, there will always be points.
3. What am I afraid of? Since I came into this world, I have no intention of leaving alive.
4, either sleep or be in a daze, the body and soul must have one in bed!
The bell in class is better than the national anthem, and the bell in class is weaker than it.
6. Throw away what you can't keep. Maybe one day it will rebound.
7. As long as you are thin, everything is omnipotent; As long as you are fat, nothing is useful.
8. Dad: Son, your daughter-in-law and I fell into the river. Who will you save first? Son: Now I want to know who you are and who you asked out. ...
9. I went to Taobao to buy a physics book today, and I saw a buyer's comment: The book is OK, but when I received it, the express list said "National talents, please give priority." This makes me feel embarrassed!
When you are in 10 Tomb-Sweeping Day, you should go back to school to sweep the grave, because your youth is buried there.
1 1, compare two fish who is handsome, and the handsome one is tomorrow's dish.
12, when someone pretends to be cool, my brother will bow his head. It's not that I'm well cultivated, but that I'm looking for a turn for the better.
13, threesome, there must be adultery.
14, the so-called pig-like roommate, is that I have a cold, let him come back and bring me a box of black and white, and he brought me a pack of Oreos.
15, if you know now that I am a psycho, then you didn't understand me before.
16, when I go to school, I like to ask my deskmate when the class is over.
17, just lying down to sleep, suddenly received a phone call, which turned out to be my classmate in the next room. "Come here, it's urgent." I reluctantly got up and asked, "Why?" "We are all lying down. Please close the door for me. Thank you. "
18, you are very creative, living is your courage, ugliness is not your intention, but God lost his temper and lived. Without you, who will foil the beauty of the world?
19, the weather is good today. I stayed indoors for a long time and am going to play in the living room.
20. A person's longest love history is probably narcissism …
2 1, anyone who has not died since ancient times has to die early or late.
22. When I grow up, I want to cut my hair short. Long hair and short knowledge show that I have culture.
23. The quality of the teacher's class determines the flow of mobile phones this month.
24. Today's parents' meeting ... A classmate was deeply moved. generate was eloquent and sighed: The farthest distance in the world is not the distance between life and death, but your future mother-in-law is standing in front of you, but you can only call an aunt. ...
25. One day Altman went to class and the teacher asked questions. Altman raised his hand and the teacher hung up.
26. You think you are a saint, but in fact you are just a psychopath among human beings.
27. In biology class, the teacher asked: How can we correctly distinguish the hands and feet of an octopus? The student replied: Give it a fart and smell it, but your hands will cover your nose, and everything else.
28. There are two reasons that prevent you from succeeding. 1 Being full means being sleepy, and waking up means being hungry. I think it is difficult for me to succeed in my life, because I am hungry every day and sleepy before eating.
29, have the opportunity to treat your brother-in-law in the future, because your sister got a lot of scold for you. ...
30. On the cliff, a little mouse waved its short front paws and jumped down again and again to learn to fly. Next to it, the mother bat looked at it, broke her head and said worriedly, its father won't tell it, it's not ours!
3 1, an old buddy lost his car. When he put the new car downstairs, he locked three locks and put a piece of paper: let you steal it! The next day, the car was not lost, and two locks and a piece of paper were added, which read: Let you ride!
32. It is said that when a girl answers the phone, if it is a strange call, her voice will definitely be very delicate. If it is a girlfriend's call, her voice is comparable to that of an aunt.
33. Take the monthly exam twice in a row and fill in the student number. During the second exam, a classmate shouted, "I just filled in the wrong student number in the exam." The teacher asked what was wrong, and the goods said, "I filled in the QQ number ..."
34. In addition to DOTA or DOTA, my predecessor's dating place will always be an Internet cafe, and I can only accompany him stupidly. One day, he was afraid that I was bored, taught me to play WeChat, and then helped me search for people nearby. So I found my boyfriend now.