The reason why I smoke is simple: My grandfather smokes, and so does my father, so it's my turn not to burn incense.

I used to think that poverty and loneliness could not catch up with me as long as I tried to run forward. But who would have thought that the hairline couldn't catch up with me.

4. Failure is the mother of success. No one will fail forever, just feel a little more maternal love.

There was a kissing scene on TV, and the father asked his son to pour a glass of water. Soon, there was a kissing scene on TV. Dad asked his son to pour another glass of water. The son asked, Dad, are you thirsty at the sight of someone kissing?

6. Qingming, I saw a child burning paper by the roadside. He steals several examination papers from time to time and throws them into the fire to burn. While burning his mouth, he muttered, "Grandpa, you are old. Doing more problems there is good for the brain and can develop intelligence. If you can't do it, you can take my class teacher away and let her teach you. "

7. A new generation of lawn environmental protection slogan: "Today you step on my head, tomorrow I will grow on your grave!"

I didn't say I hate you, but if you are on fire and I happen to have water in my hand, I will drink it in front of you.

9. Do you think boys like it as long as they are beautiful? Do you think that as long as you have money, beautiful girls will post it themselves? Do you think you can find a good job by learning to bully? I'm telling you, all this is true!

10. Why have you been single? Should you reflect on your high gender requirements?

1 1. It is said on the Internet that egg white can maintain hair! I hit an egg on my head when I was taking a shower! As a result, the water was too hot to hang an egg flower!

12. Some people review and learn new things like Confucius; Some people review the sky like a goddess; I look back like Columbus discovered the New World.

13. I have been waiting for happiness to knock at the door. I've been waiting for so many years, but I haven't knocked yet. Is my family a little biased?

14. I don't understand why there is medlar in the instant noodle vegetable bag. Do I need to stay healthy after eating instant noodles?

15. One day, I took out my fire jar and went swimming. A little girl saw it and ran and shouted, mom, mom, look at the ladybug! I turned to defend myself, and the girl got a fright: Mom, it's still ladybug essence!

16. After the haircut, the barber asked me how I was doing. I was silent for a while and said to him, I am happy if you are happy.

17. I once threatened that I would rather freeze to death than become a dog. Until today, I was frozen into a dog, because I was too young to understand that beautiful promise.

18. I just went to a small shop to buy water and saw my boss fall asleep in a rocking chair. The proprietress also beat his leg, and I instantly felt so loving. I couldn't bear to disturb them, so I took two bottles of coke and left quietly.

19. Don't complain that you can't find the right person among1400 million people, and you can't find the correct answer to four multiple-choice questions.

20. Today, I asked my wife, "If a man is ugly but rich, will you accept it?" Wife: "Why not? I want you to be poor and ugly. "

2 1. Playing mobile phone in bed at night, the goddess sends messages, will you be my boyfriend? Shit, when I was someone, I replied decisively: roll your legs, I like you so much in the lower bunk, and you treat him like this! Then I hacked her and returned the phone to the upper bunk.

22. No matter how beautiful your face is, it will grow old one day. I don't think I can afford this loss, so I have never looked good.

23. I was hospitalized for infusion last week, and the time to play mobile games passed quickly. When I looked up and saw the bottom of the bottle, I suddenly panicked and shouted, "Waiter, it's full!" "

24. Me: "Boss, is persimmon sweet?" Boss: "Sweet!" Me: "I'll try." Boss: "Don't taste!" Me: "Then how do I know if persimmon is sweet?" Boss: "Let me show you, look at my expression!" " "