You are so old that you have mastered a specialty without learning other skills. You can sleep well without sleeping pills during the day and get excited without stimulants at night.
Don't sing for the rest of your life. Girls don't work hard to make money and don't want to be beautiful. For the rest of their lives, cooking is your job, laundry is your job, housework is your job, rejection is your job, and looking after children is still your job.
It is an illusion to think that the other person likes you. I feel that the other person hates you, and nine times out of ten it is true.
5. Girls publicly voted for the class flower, and Xiaomei, who looks plain, gave a speech: If I am elected, in a few years, the sisters present here can proudly tell their husbands that I was more beautiful than the class flower when I was in college! As a result, she was unanimously elected!
6. I understand all the reasons, but I can't help turning around when I hear others calling for beauty.
7. Mermaids are fake, at least they don't exist in China history, otherwise there will be cooking methods and taste effects handed down.
8. It was late at night, and the child began to cry while sleeping. Father decided to sing a lullaby to coax him. As a result, just after singing a few words, the next door protested: let the children cry!
9. Even if a person doesn't get up until eleven o'clock in the morning, he wants to sleep for a while after lunch.
10. Seeing someone wearing the same clothes as me in the distance, I can't help but sigh: it's really the same person with different clothes. He dresses like a fool. Take a closer look, mirror!
1 1. Girls who can never unscrew the bottle cap live a happy life. And those girls who say "I don't believe I can't open it" have already lived a man's life.
12. At present, this is my situation: I don't want to introduce myself, but I can't find it myself, and my parents are urging me. Hey, living in the present really envies those who were born early!
13. I called the police as soon as my wife disappeared. The policeman said to me, calm down first. You can't take notes if you keep laughing like that.
14. It takes thousands of years to change from a monkey to a human, but it only takes a bottle of wine to change a human back into a monkey.
15. People always want ghosts and gods to know when they do good things, but they always think ghosts and gods don't know when they do bad things. We are too embarrassed.
16. I chatted with my colleagues at noon and suddenly talked about the house. I said, "The house is so expensive now. If I have a piece of land, it will really be developed! " He said, "If you have a piece of land, I'll recognize you as michel platini at once!" Just finished, the little girl at the front desk called me: "You have a courier!" Later, my adopted son refused to talk to me all afternoon.
17. Now you pay by mobile phone when you go out. It is embarrassing to bring money, and it is also embarrassing to take it out!
18. When you are young, don't despair because you have no money, because you know, there are still many days without money.
19. Losing weight is actually very simple. You should exercise hard every day, don't eat greasy food, and stick to it day after day and year after year. When you look in the mirror again, you will find that plastic surgery is more important to you than losing weight.
20. I have the ability to pick up girls, but I am a sister.
2 1. It is also said that God came to Malaysia to travel, and he couldn't even get off work after work.
After thousands of observations and summaries, I finally found that the cuteness of girls is directly proportional to the degree of eating.
23. I asked my father, "Why do I only have uncles, uncles, uncles? Why don't I have an uncle? Where is my uncle? Is he dead? " Dad raised his hand and gave me a slap in the face.
24. If I had known this was a world of looking at faces, I would have used the money from my school for plastic surgery.
25. I would like to advise all men that no matter whether their wives or girlfriends want to buy bags in the future, they should not object, because it is useless to object, and it is more generous to buy them directly. But be sure to choose your favorite color, because shopping in the future is likely to be back.
26. Although I can't cook, I can order a good takeaway!
27. Every time I lose weight, I actually scare the fat on my body. After all, it can scare away One Piece! It's winter. I am fat and warm.
28. Brushing your teeth is a bittersweet thing: holding a cup in one hand and washing utensils in the other.
Although you are poor, you must find the joy of life. Do you think a rich man like me is as happy as you think? All wet! I am happier than you think!
30. A friend is stupid to drive, and the coach is angry! The coach asked his friend, do you know how the pig died? The friend replied categorically: I am so angry!