# Let's Talk # is my first column, telling you stories about young people in cities.

The inspiration for writing this article comes from Charles Munger.

1986, Munger gave a speech on how to live a miserable life at Harvard graduation ceremony.

Most graduation speakers will choose to describe "how to live a happy life", but he thinks from the opposite side and explains how a graduate can live a painful life from the opposite side according to his personal experience.

The countryman said, "If I knew where I would die, I would never go there."

Thirty years old, even Aunt Wang next door said, young man, your life is going downhill.

Before the age of 30, the world gave you countless possibilities of life, naive, brave, restless, easy to fall in love, especially easy to be happy.

But now, you are more afraid of death. Pay attention to your health and stay up for two or three days. You have gone out to see the world. I still need the warm company of my family when I come back.

To tell the truth, I just arrived at the door of "30". I don't know if Aunt Wang is right, so I will learn from Mr. Munger once. With my limited life experience, if I do the following four things, my body and mind will be very painful, and my decline will not be far away.

First of all,

Never get into the habit of reading.

Not to mention lifelong learning.

"If a person doesn't know what happened before he was born, he will live like an ignorant child."

Cicero's words have proved that stupid people who know nothing about history cannot live an efficient and mature life.

Of course, extending this sentence, we can see that it is difficult to go long in life by relying on our own inherent knowledge.

Buffett is a learning machine. He spends half his waking hours reading books. He knows that the way to make Berkshire Hathaway make money in the past ten years may not work in the next ten years.

No matter how busy she is at work, Dong Qing, the host, reserves an hour of reading time before going to bed every day, which helps her to have a smooth and confident expression on the stage.

Like many people, I once had a bad habit. The more anxious I am in the workplace, the more I like to buy books, but after receiving them, I put them on the bookshelf or desk, so I can't spend extra time and energy patiently reading the whole book.

At the beginning of this year, I started the # 10,000-hour reading plan #. Wake up in the morning and do three actions, turn on Bluetooth, pick up the phone, click on the audio app to read, and listen to Steven Covey's The Third Choice, Gladwell's The Stranger Effect and Zhang Hongjie's The Front and Side of Zeng Guofan.

If I still feel unsatisfied after listening, I will buy a paper book to read. This will be the quietest moment of the day, and I feel full of energy. Time begins to become generous and rational, and it is not easy to fall into emotional pull.

Second,

Stop writing,

Live in the comfort zone as much as possible.

Recently, I saw a friend who had been inactive for a long time in a circle of friends write, "When I get old, I find that I don't want to change the world, but want to create a new world. I found that I have no ideal, because everything has become a dream. It's really hard to be a man. I know myself the least. "

Suddenly I was stabbed.

People are born with a kind of inertia, like to stay in a comfortable and familiar environment, avoid risks and uncontrollable, and "withering" will slowly spread and kill you.

At the beginning of last year, a toll station in Tangshan was banned and a group of workers were laid off. One of the big sisters cried and said, "I am 36 today, and my youth has been handed over to the toll booth." I can't do anything now, and nobody likes us. I can't learn anything. "

Through the screen, I feel a kind of sadness, not the sadness of her unemployment, but that she lost the courage to face life when she was only 36 years old.

Instead of forcing a person out of the comfort zone, it would be more accurate to use the expression "expanding the comfort zone".

Comfort zones also need to adapt to changes. There are always new and interesting things, and your safety range is expanding. It's best to start with what you want to do but haven't done yet.

This year, I began to learn snowboarding.

I'm afraid of standing on a high place and losing my balance. The more you are afraid, the more you can stimulate the feedback mechanism of the body in the face of difficulties and stimulate a person's willpower. Go straight downhill and push the slope along the back edge. At the beginning, every new move you made was very fulfilling. When you fall, you get up quickly. Skiing, life, is worth moving forward.

Another thing is that I applied for driving school. After a long ideological struggle, I probably still want to put a pair of elegant high heels in the car on rainy days, and then step on them to park and have dinner with the people I like.

Third,

Stop believing in love,

Those are fairy tales that deceive adults.

It is a dangerous thing to enter into intimate relationship. When age and the pressure around them hit, some people began to give up something quickly, complain and then compromise.

After all, people should have some sense of resistance and romance, otherwise it will be too boring.

In Thirteen Invitations, Xu Zhiyuan asked Cai Guoqiang what made him, and he said it was "the romance of a little boy". On September 25th this year, 20,000 white daytime fireworks, including a poem, a calligraphy and a drama, were set off on the Charande River in Cognac, France. Teacher Cai Guoqiang expressed her lonely, isolated, introspective, unyielding and optimistic life situation after the epidemic through romantic fireworks. I didn't expect the live broadcast to be cloudy, but I still saw him happy like a little boy.

Someone in Weibo asked, "Talk about how the trough of life passed."

The most praised comments are-for example, loving a pure and beautiful person.

In the back seat of a taxi, in the winter evening breeze, eating face to face, whispering in my arms, spring was suddenly released.

The regret and cost brought by innocence and profligacy sincerity are enormous, but the people in it are always unaware of it.

Therefore, I began to learn to be considerate and considerate of human weaknesses. Many times, there is no such thing as "say goodbye". I use my initial heart to face the passengers who stop in the middle.

It doesn't matter how many excellent members of the opposite sex have chased you. It is the most important thing for a respectable person to choose to stay with you all the time.

It is a sad fact that banks only lend money to the rich, and true love will only come to those who don't lack love.

It's not sad at all, it's just the truth.

Fourth,

Please be a slave to emotions,

Trapped in a low magnetic field of anxiety, jealousy and pain.

When people interact with each other, life is not just full of happiness.

Men are fine, and they are born animals who don't like entanglement. Women are more easily troubled by emotions.

Age, figure, ultraviolet rays, and women who make your boyfriend move, these are not natural enemies of modern women.

Their biggest natural enemy is their lifelong entanglement with emotions.

Except for thirty, whether you are married, single or divorced, you can't really relax. Otherwise, if you look at Gu Jia, who is smart and excellent, why do you want to rob the school district, buy Hermes, mix the wife circle, and lie in the bathtub drinking and crying after her husband cheated?

Everyone is anxious, which is a collective unconscious panic in the social environment.

In the face of ups and downs in life, some people say that I don't beat it by confrontation, but I absorb it peacefully and accept its less perfect side.

This year, I continued to look for outlets and ways to express my emotions.

Practice modern dance every Wednesday, stretching, retracting and muscle control. It is more like an emotional experience, listening to the body, letting go of self and manipulation, releasing ups and downs to achieve stability, and learning to cherish your feathers more.

Exercise, do a whole body essential oil SPA, break up regularly, meditate, watch an art exhibition at least once a month, dress up, go to a restaurant for a fine meal, go to the flower market to buy flowers, spend the weekend in the mountains with the city escape, and make some good friends seriously.

By the way, in the eyes of true friends, you will see your own value.

Age doesn't bind you, but the way you look at it.

After 30 years, the world still gives you many possibilities of life, naive, brave, restless, easy to fall in love, especially easy to be happy. Please keep the quality of these flashes.

If you are still 30 years old, please look forward to it. 30 years old, rich, thoughtful, mature and charming, super cool!

I am glad that after a long period of adjustment, I have regained my desire to express, to tell stories and to express my feelings. I sincerely hope that your response will complete my connection with the world again.

"Movies, like life, are determined by the aftertaste." I guess what Yasujirō Ozu said is right.

What did you say?/Sorry?