"We saved a lot of money for our family by taking care of our children."
Old people take their children and let their parents go out to work, which can not only increase family income, but also save a lot of family expenses, without hiring a nanny, thus creating better economic conditions for children.
"We go to bed early and get up early every day, and our children have developed good work and rest habits with us."
Most young people like to stay up late, sleep late at night, and children also sleep late. The lack of sleep is irregular, which is not conducive to children's health. On the contrary, children and the elderly have the same frequency of life. They go to bed early and get up early at night, so that they are full of energy all day and contribute to their physical development.
"We have enough time and patience to accompany our children."
Mom and dad are busy at work and under great pressure. They are often impatient with children, and always like to be angry and angry. Compared with young people, the older generation has a relatively peaceful mentality, a slower pace of life and plenty of time. They will be more patient with their children, and they will let them take their time when they encounter things, which will help improve their autonomy and self-confidence.
"Children will sympathize with the elderly and always like to help us, which can cultivate his helpful character."
In fact, old people are sometimes like children. Because you are old, you will be slow and inflexible. These characteristics can stimulate children's compassion and desire to help others. Being able to help adults will make children feel very proud, which will also help them exercise their autonomy and help others.
"Our love for our children is unconditional and we don't ask for anything in return."
The love of the older generation for their grandchildren is the most selfless. It means raising children to prevent old age, not raising grandchildren to prevent old age. Because the elderly are often old and their grandchildren are not independent, the elderly simply don't want their grandchildren to support the elderly. Nor will they expect too much from their grandchildren, making children feel that they can only be taken care of if they meet their expectations. Therefore, caring for the elderly is the most unconditional and unrequited.
Parenting by generations has its advantages, but there are also some problems.
Question 1: Children lack the consideration and care of their parents.
Old people take their children, parents go to work, and children spend less time with their parents every day. The biggest pain for children is the "lack" of their parents: they fall and their parents are not there; Toys were robbed, and mom and dad were not there; Kindergarten activities, mom and dad are not here. ......
Therefore, parents should spend more time with their children after coming home from work and let them know that you will not be missing in his education.
If the elderly and their children live in their hometown, parents should also take time to go back and see more, and make more phone calls and videos with their children to understand their lives. Even if the child is injured and his parents are absent, the postponed solatium can make up for it.
Question 2: Two generations have conflicts in the process of parenting.
Conflict is inevitable when two generations raise children together. Sometimes old people spoil their children, but their parents want to be strict with them. Old people believe in health care and buy all kinds of health products for their children, while parents only believe in food supplements and don't want their children to take supplements. ......
In the face of conflict, parents should not complain about the elderly first, they can do this:
Good communication
When communicating with the elderly, we must respect their labor and tell the truth, but we cannot deny their ability and love for their children.
For example, the old man puts on more clothes for his children, and the children make a sweat. At this time, you can take off a dress for the child and then communicate with the old man about it. "I know you are afraid that your child will freeze, but your child loves activities and sweats when he moves, so you don't have to wear so much for him, just wear one more than us adults."
Instead of accusing "always wearing so many clothes for children, whether you take care of them or not, you really don't care about them at all", this not only denies the ability and care of the elderly for their children, but also dampens their enthusiasm and hurts their self-esteem and feelings.
Grasp the bottom line
Grasping the bottom line is something that harms children's health, resolutely stop it, and have a firm attitude. Some old people still use traditional unscientific medical methods to treat their children. For example, if a child has a cold and a high fever, the old man says he doesn't have to go to the hospital, just cover his sweat. At this time, you must stop it and send the child to the hospital at once.
Take the elderly to study together.
Sometimes, the methods of the previous generation are old, but they can work. For example, old people always say that spring covers autumn, and in spring, old people will put on more clothes for their children, so that children will not catch cold because of the cold in spring. At this time, don't abandon their old methods, but should respect the labor and wisdom paid by the elderly. You can also communicate with the elderly with a modest attitude and learn new parenting knowledge with the elderly. In the process of study and practice, we should pay more attention to what the elderly have done well and express our gratitude and praise in time.
In fact, whether mom and dad raise it themselves or for generations, there will always be shortcomings and imperfections. Don't worry too much. Since there must be many realistic factors in choosing foster care, why not take a positive attitude, think more about the places where foster care is provided, and communicate and progress with the elderly with an open and inclusive attitude?