Xiaohui said that her marriage is still happy, but the whole family has changed since her mother-in-law moved to this house because of illness. She has many contradictions with her mother-in-law, and her feelings with her husband have deteriorated, and she often quarrels.
Two days ago, Xiaohui had another big fight with her husband, and even her husband almost started fighting with her. The reason is that Xiaohui refused her mother-in-law's request and didn't want to resign and go home to support the elderly. Because Xiaohui had a good career and worked hard for so many years, she didn't want to give up and thought her mother-in-law was not worth paying, so she refused.
Xiaohui said that if her mother-in-law is kind to her, she is willing to resign and go home to support the elderly. In fact, my mother-in-law is not only bad for herself, but even hurt her many times. Therefore, Xiaohui often said that not holding grudges or taking revenge is her greatest tolerance for her mother-in-law.
Xiaohui said that because the family conditions were not very good, her mother-in-law didn't agree at all when she got married, and all kinds of difficulties made her suffer a lot. Later, after pregnancy, Xiaohui was stared at by her mother-in-law everywhere because she had no son. During confinement, her mother-in-law often called her a loser, saying that she was not a woman, and even encouraged Xiaohui's husband to divorce, so Xiaohui had no respect for her mother-in-law because it was not worth it.
Xiaohui said that after her mother-in-law got sick, she wanted her to resign and support the elderly, but she had problems in her heart. In order to revenge, she can't hide the kindness of others, because Xiaohui once heard her husband say that her mother-in-law suffered a lot when she was a daughter-in-law, and she was tortured and hated by her mother-in-law all her life, so she was so extreme.
That day, her mother-in-law said to Xiaohui, "Daughter-in-law, you should quit your job and go home quickly to provide for my old age. You can't make much money anyway. " Hearing these words, Xiaohui directly replied to her mother-in-law, "Mother-in-law, why should I resign to give you a pension?" I am not a nanny! " ! Xiaohui thought that her words could make her mother-in-law speechless, but that kind of mother-in-law just said to her, "My son said you were." It was because of her mother-in-law's words that Xiaohui got angry and then refused directly.
Xiaohui refused, and her mother-in-law angrily scolded her for being unfilial. The more she scolded her, the worse she became. Xiaohui couldn't bear it, and she had a big fight with her mother-in-law. Finally, her husband asked for leave to go home and deal with it.
Xiaohui said that in fact, what makes her most chilling is her husband's attitude, because her husband actually only treats her as a nanny. After the husband came home, he not only didn't ask what happened, but pointed at Xiaohui and even almost started. That day, her husband told her to give up her mother more, because she was old and angry, and told her not to do anything that hurt her mother. It was her husband's words that made Xiaohui have the idea of divorce.
Xiaohui is very entangled in marriage. She asked me, "What should she do with this matter in the end? Should she get a divorce? " ?
Bian Xiao has something to say:
In my opinion, I think Xiaohui should think more about it. After all, marriage is not easy. It is better to tear down ten temples than ruin a marriage. If your husband finally compromises for you, then the marriage can continue. If your husband has been uncompromising and insists that you sacrifice everything to support your mother-in-law, then this marriage is not worth mentioning. Even if you persist reluctantly, you are doomed to be unhappy.
In addition, Xiaohui has no obligation to support her mother-in-law, because there is no blood relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, only social relationship, so Xiaohui is willing to support her mother-in-law out of mutual affection, and it is also her obligation not to support her mother-in-law. No one is qualified to make irresponsible remarks, and she is not wrong.
I hope all men can understand this truth: since men have no obligation to support your in-laws, then women naturally have no obligation to support their in-laws.
So there is no fixed answer to this question. It depends on how Xiaohui chooses and whether the other party will change for it.
In my opinion, the biggest problem for Xiaohui and her mother-in-law is that her mother-in-law and daughter-in-law live under one roof. At first, Xiaohui had a very good relationship with her husband, and nothing changed until her mother-in-law came. Therefore, if you want to solve family problems, you must keep your distance from her mother-in-law. There are only two solutions. The first is that you move out and take the initiative to stay away from your mother-in-law. The second is to let the mother-in-law move out, and then let the home be clean and harmonious.
In marriage, most mother-in-law thinks that the disharmony between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is because the daughter-in-law is ignorant and disrespectful, while most daughter-in-law always thinks that the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is mostly because the mother-in-law does not respect and care.
But in fact, in reality, the culprit of most mother-in-law problems is neither mother-in-law nor daughter-in-law, but a man caught between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law If a man has a sense of responsibility, then marriage will be very happy. If a man doesn't worry, he will only escape and be eccentric, then marriage is doomed to be unfortunate.
The problem of Xiaohui's family is that Xiaohui's husband is eccentric, which leads to the intensification of the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. Therefore, in order to solve Xiaohui's family affairs, only Xiaohui's husband will change his position, otherwise, the marriage will only get worse and worse, so Xiaohui had better divorce.