Why write such an article? It's not because marriage is bad and life is hard now, so I advise you not to follow my footsteps while complaining. But if you can get married, you can objectively speak out the problems you will encounter when your life is still good. Not to advise you not to marry far away, but to tell you that you can't marry far away without enough confidence and mental preparation.

I married from Shandong to Hubei, not far away, 983 kilometers. It takes eleven or twelve hours to drive and rest. However, this is not important.

What is important?

? 1. Change everything and adapt to the present.

This "gift" is really wide. Someone once said: Far marriage is actually a kind of rebirth. Yes, because you are married far away, you go to another completely strange place to feel a completely different climate change; Accept a lifestyle that you are not familiar with; To understand what you think is a foreign language; Incorporate into a group you don't know at all, not just a family. ......

You have to get used to all this, and a little problem will have a great impact on you. Because I don't know the language, I won't tell such trivial things as jokes. At first, eating their staple food always felt inadequate, and eating their food led to serious constipation in the early stage. Let me tell you a few things that torment me.

20 14 I spent my first winter in Wuhan, and it was hard to think about it. Lao She wrote Winter in Jinan, and I wanted to write Winter in Wuhan at that time. In my impression, the winter of that year came very early and very cold, which led to my gloomy mood all winter. It rained intermittently at first, and then it rained all day. Sometimes the weather is not good even if it doesn't rain. Anyway, the sun comes out less. Sometimes it turns into sleet when it rains. At that time, I went to work during the day, wrapped myself up thick, and put a small sun under my feet, barely getting by; I feel sad at night. There is no heating in the room, so there is always a damp feeling at home. /kloc-I don't even feel warm with a quilt of 0/2 kg. Although I know that using electric blankets all the time is bad for my health, I really stayed up all night that year.

Another little thing that bothers me is "moisture". If the influence of winter on me is temporary, it will be fine after winter, and the influence of heavy humidity on me will continue. Not long after I came, there were more pimples on my face. I think it's too much Chili. Sometimes I have a lot of work pressure and occasionally stay up all night. Until later, I had a pimple on my back and went to see a dermatologist. The doctor said it was caused by eczema. The doctor prescribed medicine for me at that time. After eating for a while, the acne on my back disappeared, my face still existed, and my hair was oiled quickly. From then on, I was forced to embark on the day of dehumidification. Colleagues recommend moxibustion, and I will do a few in my hand when I have time; Old people say cupping is useful, so I'll pull a few when I have time. I will also check online and make some health food such as glutinous rice porridge. In addition, I also learned to cook simple meals, and finally got used to the humidity problem after one year. Yes, I got used to it, not got rid of it.

2. The spiritual pillar has collapsed, and new support needs to be established.

What is a person's greatest support? Spiritual support. It can be said that from small to large, our biggest pillar is our parents. They are not only the pillars of our life, but also a large part of our spirit comes from them. When you are completely gone and out of the sight of your parents, they can't even see your back, and you dare not tell them no matter how bitter you are. The other is a friend. Romain rolland said, "With friends, life shows its full value".

I have lived in Shandong since I was a child and studied in Shandong, so almost all my relatives and friends are here. Life is never smooth sailing, and it is inevitable that there will be bumps between husband and wife. Once, I disagreed with my husband because of a little thing, and then I didn't give in. The biggest quarrel broke out between us in history. That night, I made a dash for the door and ran out of the community at the fastest speed in my life. As a result, I calmed down and found nowhere to go. I want to call my parents, but it's past 9 pm, and I'm crying again. I'm afraid I can't help crying after hearing their voices, which worries them "thousands of miles away" because I know they can't help at all. I called my best friend. After the phone was connected, my best friend was very lively. It turned out to be her childhood boyfriend's birthday, and I called many friends I knew to celebrate. I called, and they thought I called because he said hello on his birthday. After all, I was one of my friends who celebrated in earlier years. After expressing my blessing, I hung up the phone like I ran away, and I was very lost in my heart. It turns out that I have been so far away from them. Just sitting there, I don't know if it's because of the quarrel or because of the sad past of relatives and friends. Although my husband came soon and we made up soon, the sadness at that time, the loss at that time and the feeling of "homelessness" at that time are estimated to be unforgettable in my life.

Later, my husband worried that I always stayed at home on weekends. The two of us discussed it, bought a Rottweiler and asked her captain to accompany me and protect me. Since then, he has become my child, my baby and my strong backing. I am happy that she is with me, and I am sad. She accompanied me silently and sometimes licked my tears very sensibly. Then came Xiaomi, Teddy Dog. Of course, while walking them, I made many like-minded friends. I'm lucky to have them.

? If your parents are here, you should marry far away.

There are many articles on the Internet saying that "parents are here, and it's not far from getting married", but when love really happens, when two people are separated, and your idea of "I want to go anywhere with you, I know everything is not easy" is about to overwhelm your brain, please think about your parents carefully.

You can't know your parents' good until you have a child. Although I am pregnant with a baby now, my understanding of this sentence is obviously different because it is concrete. From the moment I knew I had a baby, I felt that my mother felt very novel and careful about me, and my father was as happy as my husband. When I went to the maternity check-up that day, one of the indicators was low. The doctor said there was a possibility of miscarriage. I'm really scared. Doctors take medicine more actively than anyone else. I listen to people's advice on the internet every day, but it's solved. In these ten or twenty years of life, it goes without saying what our parents have done for us, because that is not what they care about. What they care about is, will you live well in the future? They are afraid, they are afraid that we will suffer, and they are even more afraid that we will not say it when we suffer, and bite our teeth and swallow them in our stomachs; Afraid that we have suffered, they can't get justice for us. What can they do if they scold each other on the phone? They couldn't bear to part with the little princess who was afraid to break it in her hand and melt it in her mouth, so they washed her hands and made bride soup, a distant man who felt ordinary.

When I was a child, my sister and I were naughty and my hands were cold in winter. This also formed the habit of my mother touching our hands from time to time. Last time my sister sent a message that it was very cold that day, and my nephew's hands were very cold. Grandma suddenly sighed while warming his hands, with tears in her eyes. "Your aunt's hands are often cold in winter. I wonder if your uncle knows to warm her up." She burst into tears. Sometimes, the distance is too far. For her, just touching your hand is a luxury. It is better to travel far than to marry far away, and the return date is far away!

Tu Lei said in The Battle of Love: I have always opposed a woman leaving her hometown for a man. Judging from the data performance, there are few successes. Yes, it's really hard to get, and even if it's a successful marriage, do you think it's more gain or loss for yourself?

Finally, just to remind you that after reading so much, you think it's ok. Just think, "If your daughter is going to marry far away, can you stand it?" If your answer is yes, then get married!