This is a universal problem, how many people have encountered, or are suffering, or will inevitably encounter in the unknown future. But this is an unsolved problem. If life is like mathematics, then this problem is Riemann conjecture in life. For a person who is in deep trouble, there is never any generalization, and the experience and warnings of others are not sufficient. Let's sort it out a little. The difficulties in this issue are listed as follows. First of all, what is true love? Any partner relationship that develops later is bound to face the consequences and process of passion fading, which will have the so-called Coolidge effect on familiar partners, that is, passion ceases and sexual desire fades. Couples at this time will be full of sex and passion. Is the feeling of passion true love? This is a ... Not only that, any kind of partnership will inevitably go through a running-in period if it wants to maintain and develop. Generally speaking, a love relationship is initially a passionate period. At this time, the other person looked at each other with rose glasses, freckles on his face were icing on the cake, and his rude behavior was unrestrained. However, once the passion period is over and the relationship enters the running-in period, the rosy glasses will become dazzling magnifying glasses, and any small flaw of the other party will be like a huge tumor, even the original characteristics of crazy love will become mosquito blood and white rice. Are all kinds of unbearable during the running-in period just not loving? The second is. In addition, meet the right new people to ignite passion; Newcomers see you as rosy glasses, and so do you see each other. So what makes you think that the new relationship will not repeat the same mistakes? Third.
Secondly, even if you think the relationship with the new person is true love, what does marriage mean to you? Why did you get married in the first place? You know, marriage and love are actually two different categories, and they may be related. If you get married because of love; Maybe it's okay. If you get married just because you are old enough to get married, or for economic reasons, or to have a legitimate baby, it has nothing to do with love. For those who get married because of love or love, love is dynamic, but marriage has different logic and rules. Love can be willful and spontaneous, but marriage needs more responsibility and persistence. When you meet true love outside marriage, whether it is because the old love broke down or you met a new confidant, if the previous love can't persist, why can the new love be killed? For two people who are together because of love, maintaining love is a kind of ability, and persisting in love is a kind of determination. In the marriage of love, can you be sure that your true love is not the result of shrinking and escaping because of lack of ability to maintain love or determination to persist in love?
Of course, if the conclusion of marriage is a factor other than love, then since love has been abandoned from the beginning, what reason is there to endanger marriage because of love? At the beginning, you chose to marry that person because of Beijing hukou and economic conditions. You got a chance to settle down and improve your family's economy. Can you have your cake and eat it? Finally, it is precisely because love and marriage are two related but different categories. Love comes from nature and marriage comes from custom, so how to choose between love and obedience? What is the right thing, not what to run away from, what to prove, what to yearn for? If you want to maintain a double life, you will face social pressure and moral pressure. If you are not careful, you will lose everything, or lose everything. Can your society and situation accommodate your double life? Is your true love proud of your double life instead of quenching thirst by drinking poison? If you want red roses and white roses to bloom, if you can be happy, have you told your marriage partner frankly? No cheating, no hiding? At the same time, do you reach an understanding with your marriage partner, play games with each other and maintain an equal and open relationship?
If you want to give up your original marriage and marry your true love, then you must properly handle the divorce and bear the financial responsibility and moral punishment as the wrong party in the marriage. Are you sure you're ready? Are you ready to take it? In my opinion, whether in marriage or out of marriage, true love is in a long-term relationship, and you are more free, relaxed and fearless in the relationship. You don't have to pretend anything or suppress anything; You can communicate equally and easily, without forbearance or concern; In front of him (her), you are a complete self, and the other person is also a complete self. Even if you share the most intimate privacy, you are fearless. To tell the truth, how lucky I am to meet such a partner in my life! Someone you and I once loved deeply was just one of the sentient beings, but love came from the heart, thinking that he/she would be the favorite in this life. When you think you love him, you think he/she is the most precious. When everything goes back to the original state, life goes on, and he/she is just a passer-by in our life.
We are not sure which one we love most in this life. If we don't know how to cherish, people who love you/you will one day become passers-by around you. It is not easy to find the person you love, nor is it easy to find the person who loves you. If you are not sure who you love the most, why not cherish this feeling when you become someone else's lover? Love comes from the heart. You can love him/her naturally by telling yourself that you love him/her. If the person you love doesn't love you, please remember that love comes from the heart. But you care too much about him/her. Try to open your eyes, and you will find bright candles everywhere. Love or not love is nothing more than an idea. Let bygones be bygones, love is in the past. Just a part of our life, just a drop of water in the vast sea, just a grain of dust in the long crossbow. Without those pasts, we wouldn't have you and me now. It is better to cherish the present than to be half-hearted.
Finally, it's the same old saying, I wish all lovers in the world will be well.