Combined with my own experience (workplace-entrepreneurship-stay-at-home mom-freelancer), I will focus on the content of stay-at-home mom and freelancer. Then let's learn about career planning first.
First, the definition and stages of career planning:
1. What is career planning? Is to help you find the most comfortable working and living conditions. That is to say, on the basis of fully understanding your future vision, current confusion, personal abilities and resources, follow the social development, choose your favorite and most likely successful career, and provide feasible and clear solutions.
2. Four stages of career development
A professional woman, from employment in her twenties to retirement at the age of 65, has about 40 years. For so long,
Career is divided into four stages: survival period, development period, balance period and realization period.
Second, look at the roles in different stages of life with a space-time telescope.
Everyone has a different outlook on life, but each of us will experience one thing: the role of life at different stages.
Similarly, our roles are different at each stage.
Before work: students, daughters.
After work: daughter, worker.
After forming a family: daughter, worker, wife.
After being a mother: daughter, worker, wife, mother.
After retirement: wife and mother.
From this picture, we can see that the stage with the most roles is after marriage and motherhood, especially after motherhood-the more roles a person has, the more responsibilities and obligations he has, and the greater the pressure. So what do mothers do?
1, role sorting (role pie chart)
1) Important role first.
When we are confused, we can ask ourselves a few questions:
What roles can't be played without you?
What roles do you not play now, and you will have a chance later?
What roles do you particularly value now?
Please note that the answer is not based on whether others think you are important or not, but on how important you think this matter is to you.
Arrange roles in a "most important, less important, less important" way. Let the important characters go first. Except for some special circumstances, the role of mother is relatively difficult to avoid; The roles of children and wives are handled well, which will be support for the family; The role of the workplace, we have lengthened the time, the retirement age should be 65 years old (if you are a freelancer, you can decide the retirement time yourself), in fact, there are always opportunities in the future.
The best choice is short-term trade-off and long-term integration.
Our life script is very long, and we can choose the most wonderful protagonist to play at each stage, instead of playing many supporting roles at the same time. It is very tiring to change places every day.
2) Grasp the focus of the role and achieve the unity of knowledge and action.
China has a classic theory: the unity of knowledge and action.
Use "knowledge" to guide "line", and then constantly use "line" to correct your "knowledge" in practice.
You should understand what you want to do and why; You should be fully aware that what you do is what you want.
Because these goals are actually to let others and the outside world decide your value. Even if you can achieve these goals, the happiness you get will be fleeting, because your real needs are not met.
Third, the mother's occupation.
Here, combining the characteristics of working mothers and stay-at-home mothers, I will talk about their career plans respectively.
1. How do working mothers plan their careers?
1, find the right career orientation:
After giving birth to a child, many mothers will be confused about "starting a business or choosing a career for promotion". What should I do?
You can use the ability matrix tool, that is, first find out what your strengths are. What is the potential? Is there any blind spot or retreat?
Advantages: like and good at it.
Blind spot: I don't like it or be good at it.
Retire: Good at it but I don't like it.
Potential: like but not good at it.
List these four points in detail. When making a decision, you can use the tool of "Decision Balance Table" to score three choices from different dimensions in combination with your own abilities, advantages, resources, interests, demands and expectations. Look at that. The score is high. That's the last choice you have to make.
2. Give full play to your advantages: Congressman
What is MPS? It refers to: meaning, pleasure and strength. Finding a suitable job can give play to our advantages and enthusiasm.
We ask ourselves three key questions: What can bring me meaning? What can bring me happiness? What are my strengths? Find out the intersection of these things, and this kind of work is the work that can make you feel happy.
MPS method is a very good tool, and we can find ourselves a job that is both interesting and meaningful, and can give full play to our personal advantages. Another hint that MPS method gives us is that people have the right to choose jobs. Happiness does not depend on what we get or where we are, but on what perspective we choose to look at life.
3, career four (upward, in-depth, left and right, outward development)
When you find your own MPS (Happy Life) mode, you can look at the four realization paths by the method of career four.
(1) develops upward. Is whether there is room for improvement within the company.
(2) Develop in depth. Develop in depth within the company.
(3) Left and right development. Change the function and enter a field that is more suitable for you. For example, technicians or managers who have many years of experience can change their internal training.
(4) outward development. To put it bluntly, if the career plan you want can't develop in the company, you should consider jumping ship or starting a business.
4. Find the sweet spot of your career. This is detailed in the stay-at-home mom plan.
In addition, when mothers are confused, unclear and hesitant, this book provides 19 tools to help mothers get rid of confusion. Such as role balance wheel, role pie chart, weight factor score table, commercial canvas, AMBR focus management method and other tools.
Second, the career planning of stay-at-home mothers (only a few pages in the book introduce the career planning of stay-at-home mothers, and I will introduce it in detail here)
Speaking of stay-at-home mothers, I believe many stay-at-home mothers must have a lot to say and a lot of helplessness, but what I want to say is that stay-at-home mothers can lead a more wonderful life.
(1) Look at your own value. There are many stay-at-home mothers who only care about their children and husbands and feel useless because they have no job. In fact, a stay-at-home mother is a well-paid job, the author's picture shows.
According to the market wage of "live-in nanny+parenting sister-in-law+full-time housekeeper", full-time mothers need at least 20,000 yuan a month. Some stay-at-home mothers are constantly studying psychology and family education to raise their children. This kind of value cannot be measured by money! There are also some stay-at-home mothers who like making desserts and writing. They can turn their hobbies and specialties into freelancing, which will produce greater value.
(2) Who is suitable to be a full-time mother?
In fact, many people become full-time mothers, and they have never thought that they will become full-time mothers. Many times, they are forced by life. Nowadays, many post-90 s mothers have more ideas, and of course they are confused. At this time, you can use the four questions in the book to ask yourself whether you have these conditions and whether you are ready.
Q 1 Is there a good husband who can understand you and know how to hurt people? This is crucial. A husband who knows, understands and affirms his wife can take the initiative to share housework. This is to give full-time mothers strength and support.
Whether Q2 has a reasonable husband's family. I can understand the difficulty of being a full-time mother, not participating in small family disputes, occasionally helping you with your children or not giving you any trouble.
Whether Q3 has sufficient economic foundation. In this respect, I personally think it depends on everyone's pursuit. If the pursuit of quality of life, and the other half of the income can not reach, we should consider whether to full-time. In addition, if you have enough money and no extra expenses, you can be a full-time mother.
Whether Q4 has sufficient ability and independent personality. I think this is very important. Stay-at-home mothers should not stay in their comfort zone, but should constantly improve themselves, see the present situation clearly, see the future clearly, and know that now is their choice, and there is a broader way to go in the future.
In addition, I have my own circle and hobbies. I don't want to be a yellow-faced woman or an unsatisfied wife. I have always maintained my wisdom and beauty. At the same time, keep an enterprising learning heart: learning English, drawing, dancing, etiquette, psychology, design … doing public welfare, training, giving lectures and sharing …
Never say, "When the children are older, I will start after a while ..." Being a stay-at-home mother requires not only love, but also effective leadership and management. It is not only the children who need to be managed, but also the mother herself. Learn to love and be responsible for yourself first, and then love your family.
Therefore, stay-at-home mothers should stop feeling sorry for themselves, accept their role, see their own value and do their current role well.
(3) Career planning of stay-at-home mothers.
When it comes to the value of being a full-time mother, I can turn my specialty and hobby into a sideline and become a freelancer, such as a common yoga instructor, self-media, lecturer and designer. So that I can take care of my family and career.
Of course, this balance is relative, and there is no real balance. This balance can make stay-at-home mothers have the motivation to do things and full of hope for life.
So how do stay-at-home mothers plan their own freelancing? First of all, we should consider the characteristics of freelancing, namely initiative, independence, planning and timing.
Initiative refers to whether a person can take the initiative to make decisions, take the initiative to learn and take the initiative to change;
Independence refers to whether you can undertake and independently complete a high-load workload, and this process is a lonely process, and no team can communicate;
Planning is to complete the goal, to arrange time, divide tasks, and do it in stages.
Timing refers to whether an individual is ready to understand the market and so on.
If the above four characteristics are met, stay-at-home mothers can find their own professional sweet areas.
Practice: Find a piece of A4 paper, list the things you like and are good at, and take their intersection, or take the intersection with liquidity. This is the sweet spot of career.
(4) self-management of stay-at-home mothers.
The first rule in self-management is management by objectives. It is inefficient to do things without goals, and stay-at-home mothers are easy to feel anxious and despised. You can use 10 minutes in the evening or one morning (preferably after getting up) to make a timetable, write down all the tasks and plan the important order.
The tool mentioned in the book is the four quadrants of time management, which divides things into four categories, namely, important emergency, important non-emergency, unimportant emergency, unimportant or non-emergency.
The second is time management. For stay-at-home mothers, the most distressing problem is that they are obsessed with trivial matters every day and feel that they have little time left for themselves. Here is the need to get rid of, that is, to subtract something. For example, doing housework, many stay-at-home mothers spend a lot of time doing housework and spend several hours mopping the floor and cleaning every day. Actually, mopping the floor doesn't need to be done every day. This can reduce. Usually sweeping the floor and washing dishes are all children can do. Some children have the ability to cook, and mothers know how to let go. This can cultivate children's independent ability and relax themselves.
As for the time, you can use 10 minutes in the evening or one morning (preferably after getting up) to make a timetable and list the things to do. I like to use To do list (list the things to do in a day, and allocate them in four quadrants reasonably in combination with time management), combined with pomodoro technique. Can make work and work more efficient! Focus on work for 25 minutes, rest for 5 minutes, for a tomato. You can rest after four tomatoes 10-20 minutes.
I talked about fixed time earlier, that is, the time when the children are not around and belong to themselves. There is also some spare time to pick up and drop off children or go out to work. You can use your spare time to read books and do things. During the epidemic in 2020, I went out to work, took the 1 hour subway, read 1 book, made 1 PPT courseware and lecture notes, made 1 mind map, and communicated with two customers on WeChat.
If some mothers are auditory, they can also use cooking time and housework time to do things while listening to classes.
Third: habit formation, healthy work and rest, and balanced diet.
Regarding healthy work and rest, mothers should remember not to stay up late. Especially for freelance mothers, a healthy work and rest is the greatest protection for themselves and their families. Keep in mind the following three points.
(1) Work and rest according to the biological clock. You can get up early, but don't stay up late. Try to ensure more than 7 hours of sleep every day. If you stay up late on the first day, you'd better catch up on sleep the next day.
(2) Learn to take the initiative to rest. The longer the human body continues to work or the greater the intensity, the heavier the degree of fatigue and the longer the time to eliminate fatigue.
(3) Life lies in exercise. Adhere to reasonable exercise, even at home, you can do squats, yoga and shoulder exercises. If conditions permit, you'd better go downstairs for a run or walk. Exercise can not only relieve stress and relax the brain, but also give the brain a rest.
The fourth is to do the best, backup and posterior three programs.
Finally, send a message to all mothers:
To mothers.
Mother is a kind of identity, which contains two meanings: one is herself, and the other is the mother of the child.
Mother is also a kind of relationship, representing the blood and emotional connection with children. This relationship is established between two independent personalities, neither of whom is attached to the other, and neither of them is everything to the other.
Only when a mother becomes a good "self" can she establish a healthy and positive bond with her children.
You don't need to be a perfect mother. Mother is very fragile and occasionally makes mistakes. Just tell your child that you are willing to try to correct it.
You don't have to keep calm all the time. If you lose your temper with your child, apologize to the child and explain the reasons, but don't ask the child to forgive yourself.
You don't need to be an all-around woman, you should give yourself some space and time, develop good habits, learn good methods and waste as little time as possible.
May all mothers find a way to balance their careers and families and build a happy life!