: the day of haircut
Aunt Hu went to her daughter's house and was startled when she entered the door. She saw her son-in-law, Iowa, with unkempt hair and unkempt beard. Aunt Hu couldn't help but advise Ahua: "The hair and beard are so long, please take a break."
Hua just said "hmm". The daughter pouted at the side and said, "People want to be artists, and they don't look like beards and short hair!"
It turns out that Hua is a writer and is usually informal. During this time, he was thinking about a long story. If the door is closed, he will let his hair and beard grow out.
Aunt Hu is always unaccustomed to saying it several times a day. Hua always answers very well, but he can't see any actual action.
On this day, Aunt Hu nagged again. Seeing that Iowa didn't respond, Aunt Hu blamed her daughter. The daughter smiled mysteriously and said, "Don't worry, Mom, he won't get a haircut before that."
Aunt Hu asked angrily, "When was that?"
My daughter went into the study for a while, then came out and said with a smile, "Soon, he will definitely have a haircut this week."
Two days later, Iowa suddenly went out early in the morning and came back at noon. Aunt Hu was happy at first sight. Hua did cut his hair, it was neat, he had no beard, and he was ten years younger.
Aunt Hu quietly asked her daughter, "How do you know he is going to have a haircut these days?"
The daughter smiled and said, "Because he is going to the post office today."
"Will you get a haircut when you go to the post office?" Aunt Hu asked in wonder, "What is he doing in the post office?"
The daughter smiled and said, "He has a draft due, so he must get it."
Aunt Hu still doesn't understand: "Do you need a haircut to have money?"
"You have to look at your ID card to withdraw money." The daughter fought back a smile and said, "If he doesn't get a haircut, people will deny him and give him money back!" "
: lose weight
Xiaoli is a post-90s girl. She is watery and tall, but a little fat. In order to build a slim figure, Xiaoli joined a slimming friend WeChat circle, met many like-minded people, and learned all kinds of strange tricks that she had never heard before.
In order to lose weight successfully, Xiaoli spent a lot of money on slimming tea, slimming soap, slimming cream and so on recommended by the circle, but it didn't work at all after a circle. Later, some people said that smelling garlic and onions was effective, so Xiaoli bought dozens of pounds of onions to smell at home and stuffed half of them into her bag every day. She snuck them out at work and let her colleagues in the office stare at her strangely from time to time. Later, a close colleague whispered to her, "You seem to have farted a lot recently. I'm telling you, Xiaoli, the old fart means there is something wrong with your stomach. You'd better go to the hospital for a checkup. " Xiaoli is ashamed and really wants to find a hole to drill down. The smell slimming method finally went away.
No way, then you can only take the ultimate diet and hunger strike. Xiaoli can eat very much since she was a child, and she loves meat very much. If she wants to eat less, she might as well cut a piece of meat. Wei You suggested that at first, we should give up meat, then cancel dinner and eat at most one fruit. Xiao Li is cross-minded, and it is worthwhile to give up everything for her figure.
At noon, Xiaoli only ordered two vegetarian dishes and one or two rice. The aunt who was cooking joked, "Xiaoli, you have to lose weight." Xiaoli nodded embarrassedly. Xiaoli's stomach began to growl before she got off work. I finally got home, and my stomach began to get hairy again. Xiaoli quickly stuffed an extra-large apple into it. Xiaoli feels that she must hold on to the first day.
At ten o'clock, Xiaoli finished washing and was ready for bed. Xiaoli tried to ignore her stomach, thinking about seeing a micro-friend who lost weight successfully in the WeChat circle during the day. After half a year's efforts, her weight has been reduced from 130 kg to 100 kg, which is really enviable. Why is my road to losing weight so difficult? Thinking about it, Xiaoli fell asleep.
In the middle of the night, Xiaoli saw a skinny old woman lying on the ground in her dream, holding a bowl with withered hands, as if begging. People on the road passed by coldly. At this moment, a child approached the old woman. He waved a big white steamed bun in front of her eyes, smiled twice, then stuffed it in his mouth and walked away. The old woman suddenly became a demon and ran to the child with her teeth bared. Xiaoli sat up in shock, scared out in a cold sweat and instantly felt dizzy and weak.
Xiaoli suddenly got out of bed, ran to the kitchen and took out her beloved instant noodles and sausages. Then I took a steaming photo and sent it to the WeChat circle, leaving a message: I would rather be fat than be a hungry ghost. I didn't expect another group of micro-friends to be night owls. "You are ruining your future." "Persistence is success and you can't give up easily." "Stay away from drugs and refuse temptation."
After dinner, Xiaoli went to bed contentedly. She has secretly decided the way to lose weight in the future: eat more and exercise more.
Listen to the slogan
Han Xiao is the head waiter of a hairdressing shop. In order to enhance the popularity of the store, employees are organized to line up at the door of the store every day, clapping their hands and shouting slogans to please customers. Because the employees are all girls, they were ashamed to speak in public at first, but with the constant encouragement of Han provided, the slogan became louder and louder.
On this day, Han Xiao saw a bystander fascinated, so he deliberately asked the shop assistants to shout the slogan again, but after the team was dissolved, the man with a little sparse hair was still wandering at the door of the store. Xiao Han greeted him and said, "Sir, we have introduced a new conditioner. Do you want to try? " The man touched his forehead, waved and hurried away.
The next day, the man came to see and listen to the slogan again, and his expression was very focused. Han provided for the girl to shout twice again, but the man was still wanting more and refused to leave immediately. Han Xiao said enthusiastically, "Sir, there is a new hair care expert in our shop ..." The man interrupted, "No, no, I don't need any experts!" Say that finish, he hurried away again.
On the third day, the man came early again. Han Xiao deliberately asked the girls to raise their voices and shout slogans for more than three times. Han Xiao saw that the man was simply listening to stupidity. He was stunned for a long time, so he smiled and said to him, "Sir, our store has newly introduced an American hair transplant technology ..."
When the man recovered, he shook his head and began to run. Han provided quickly grabbed him and said, "What do you mean by listening to slogans every day?" The man paused and said awkwardly, "This, this is really embarrassing to say!" "
"What can't you say?"
The man said hesitantly, "The slogan you girls shout is like a barrage-'I like you, I like you very much, I like you very much …' Hehe, I sound really comfortable! Oh, I have been married for ten years, and my wife has never said that she likes me ... "