There are many such examples in life. Maybe we don't realize that these behaviors are wrong, but it is these habitual life details that lead to the lack of independent exercise opportunities for children since childhood.
Some parents think that life skills such as eating and dressing don't need to be practiced, and children will naturally have them when they grow up. In fact, this concept is incorrect, which will lead children to form the bad habit of "clothes reach out and food opens their mouths" from an early age, and also lead children to form an inert psychology, refuse to think when encountering problems, and cannot handle things alone. From the perspective of children's development, not giving children the opportunity to exercise is tantamount to depriving them of the opportunity to develop their self-care ability. Over time, children will lose their independence, which is very unfavorable for their growth.
Nowadays, many parents spoil their children too much, especially the children brought up by grandparents, who have been held in their hands like little princesses and emperors since childhood. I'm afraid he'll be surprised when I sleep. I'm afraid he'll choke when I eat ... When I go out to play, I'm often a "nanny" or a "bodyguard", wiping my nose, dressing myself and walking all the time, for fear that my child will fall. How can a child who grew up under excessive care be independent? Still give children more space, let them do more work and use their brains, and learn to solve problems by themselves! Because once children lose this concern, they often show panic and confusion at a loss. Therefore, it is not difficult to understand why children who have just entered kindergarten always cry, make a scene, are difficult to adapt, and are often accompanied by anxiety and rejection.
Psychologists' research shows that about 3 years old is a sensitive period to cultivate children's independence. When the child is about 3 years old, self-awareness begins to sprout and develop, and gradually shows an independent tendency. He often refuses the help of adults and tries to do something by himself. It is common for children to ask themselves to do things at the age of three. Parents should seize and take advantage of this great opportunity to cultivate their independence. It is necessary to establish an independent personality and consciousness for children from an early age, and the sooner they are cultivated, the better.
1 Grasp the critical period of children's independence cultivation
At the age of two, children's independence develops fastest. The initial self-concept appears, and they begin to address themselves with the first person "I", such as "Give me", "I want", "I want" and "I will do it myself". And they have the intention of self-independence.
This initial attempt of children is an indispensable step in the process of children's growth, and it is also a gratifying progress for children. Adults should seize the sensitive period when children want to be independent, master the necessary educational strategies and points, so that children's independent requirements can be met, and don't let children lose their interest and curiosity in trying themselves after being rejected, but promote the formation of excessive dependence.
2. Respect children's curiosity and stimulate children's interest in exploration.
Limited by the level of physical development, children are immature in muscle strength, movement accuracy and flexibility, and lack of life experience. Although they have a positive attitude, they often screw things up, bring some confusion and break the original family life order, which is inevitable. At this time, if children don't do well, they won't do it themselves if they are screwed up by adults. All parents will do it instead. After that, children will gradually lose interest in doing things and gradually develop the bad habit of relying on adults.
Let the children do what they can.
Mr. Chen Heqin, a famous education expert in China, said: "Everything a child can do should be done by himself, not by him." In daily life, we should follow the principle of "adults let go, children do it", cultivate children's self-care ability, and let children start by doing something they can. Parents can take advantage of the situation according to their children's interests and abilities, and teach their children some self-service skills from the easy to the difficult through concrete and meticulous demonstrations.
4. Teach children the right to choose and let them be their own masters.
5. Step by step improvement and exercise.
The cultivation of independence is a long-term process, which needs to be gradual. Don't rush for success and make unreasonable demands on children's development. You can't blame the child for not meeting your requirements for a while. In order to let children improve and exercise themselves step by step, parents should not only provide some guidance and help in time, but also give timely praise and affirmation, and set an example.