In the relationship between men and women, quality is very important. When the passion of love fades, it is not appearance and talent, nor money and status, but a person's inner quality that can really support a dull life.
Here, how to judge a boyfriend from his attitude towards his ex-girlfriend, let's take a look at the following situation.
First, I don't want to tell my new girlfriend about my ex-girlfriend and secretly associate with her ex-girlfriend.
? Behind my back? There are two kinds of men who have contacts with ex-girlfriends, one is introverted and kind, and the other is afraid of taking responsibility.
An introverted and kind man
An introverted and kind man is unwilling to talk about the past with his new girlfriend. First, he thinks that it is his past, which belongs to his personal privacy and has nothing to do with the present. Secondly, more importantly, most kind men are afraid that his past will hurt his new girlfriend and affect his relationship with her, so they generally keep silent about the past in front of his new girlfriend.
Usually, his attitude towards his girlfriend is as follows:
1. After the passion faded, he found himself still attached to his ex-girlfriend, at least he didn't want to give up on her, even as a general friend.
From the point of friendship, he doesn't want to lose his ex-girlfriend.
When the current girlfriend needs help, he generally won't refuse and will do his best, but there is a premise that he doesn't want to affect the relationship with his new girlfriend by helping his ex-girlfriend.
Because he is kind and responsible at the same time, he generally doesn't mess around and has strong personal self-discipline.
5. once? Hidden feelings? Exposed, he will sincerely express his confession and seek the understanding of his girlfriend.
6. In the process of expressing his love, he will not vilify his ex-girlfriend in order to please his new girlfriend, nor will he hurt his new girlfriend in order to protect his ex-girlfriend. On the contrary, no matter what contradictions and conflicts there are, he will stand up and take responsibility.
Psychoanalysis: the misunderstanding of women
Due to the influence of the theory of love specificity, many women seem to find it difficult to understand this kind of man and think that this kind of man? Playboy? 、? Not good? Especially when he defends his ex-girlfriend and takes responsibility for himself, it is not easy for women to see the brilliance of their inner quality, but they mistakenly think that this is a boyfriend's half-hearted attitude towards his ex-girlfriend. In fact, because men generally like the new and hate the old, there is no absolute love view for women from the beginning; Especially kind men, because of their passion for love, are reluctant to part with two kinds of feelings. Although he will restrain himself because of his personal qualities and self-discipline, he still seldom likes a woman emotionally. Loyalty? From the perspective of open love, the only thing is neither a mirage nor a castle in the air. As a lover or wife, there will be something real only if you are in a wide range of interpersonal relationships. Only the sincerity rooted in friendship can love be beautiful. Therefore, if you love your boyfriend, you must consciously abandon the narrowness of traditional women and open your boyfriend's personal self-discipline with self-improvement and forgiveness.
Afraid of responsible people
A man who is afraid of taking responsibility has many similarities with a kind man in his attitude towards his ex-girlfriend. However, due to his lack of sincerity and fear of taking responsibility, compared with the latter, he has poor self-discipline and shows anxiety and selfishness at critical times.
Therefore, young girls should take the following performance as a reference to judge false love:
1, because of lack of kindness, fear of taking responsibility, poor personal self-discipline, and sometimes may mess around.
Once the secret is exposed, he may make up lies to avoid personal responsibility.
Even if he has to confess his love affair, it is still difficult for him to discard his lies, either to slander his ex-girlfriend in order to please his new girlfriend or to hurt his new girlfriend in order to safeguard his personal interests. In short, he will not stand up in the face of any contradictions and conflicts, but will try his best to avoid responsibility to excuse himself.
Psychoanalysis: women's credulity
In real life, women's deception usually begins with their credulity to lies. Because of the influence of love dreams, they believe in absolute love and want to have 100% lovers. Women lose their due discrimination between praise and lies: when a boyfriend slanders his ex-girlfriend in front of you, you think it is his loyalty to you; When your boyfriend pretends to defend himself, you firmly believe that it is his touching love story.
To understand their own weaknesses, contemporary women should learn to see the essence through phenomena as soon as possible: when your boyfriend praises your ex-girlfriend, you should see kindness and truth from his praise to others; When he stood up for his ex-girlfriend at a critical moment, you should know that in the changeable life in the future, only men who dare to take responsibility are worthy of your trust. On the contrary, if you only indulge in his pleasure of slandering others, you may be slandered in the future; If he dare not defend his former love in front of you, it will be difficult for him to defend you in front of other women in the future.
Second, confess your ex-girlfriend to your new girlfriend and openly associate with her ex-girlfriend.
There are also two kinds of men who openly associate with their ex-girlfriends: one is enlightened and the other is cynical.
A frank person
Such a man is rare in life, but it is not without it. The characteristic of this man is that he is not afraid of all difficulties and hardships, and he can go through fire and water at any time for love. Because of this, from the secular point of view, he also has absolute self-centeredness, ignores all commandments and morality, and has the weakness of fickle.
Psychoanalysis: the situation of women
If you happen to meet such a man, you should know that holding hands with such a man requires the following advantages:
1, you need to really recognize his sincerity and be able to see him? Frivolity? The emotion behind it is heavy.
You must be an excellent woman to keep your temptation and attraction in front of such a picky man.
You need to be generous to others. If you don't treat his ex-girlfriend well, even if he loves you, he won't allow you to hurt another woman because he loves you.
You also need to be philosophical and energetic, and accept changes at any time. To do this, you need to have your own work and independent thinking. Because he is a person who loves to change, only by catching up with his changes can you control him.
A cynical person
If you are unlucky enough to fall in love with such a man, it means that you may have the characteristics that such a man likes: cynicism, vanity, money worship and so on.
This kind of man will like it at first. If he finds you like him, he will naturally welcome you. At this time, he will not only show off his past to you, but also lure you into his circle with open bait. For example, he will introduce you to his ex-girlfriend and even openly invite you to participate in cynical games.
Most of these men's attitudes towards their ex-girlfriends have the following characteristics:
1, he will praise his ex-girlfriend without scruple in front of you, not praising women, but showing off his skills.
2, he will be desperate to slander his ex-girlfriend in front of you, not to make you happy, but to make you listen to him.
He sometimes hits people? Avantgarde? The banner advises you to meet his ex-girlfriend, not for your friendship with her, but for freshness and excitement.
Once he finds out that his ex-girlfriend is entangled in happy time, he will mercilessly abuse her or dump her, even though he will say it is to love you in front of you.