In my memory, my real happiness from the inside out can be calculated by "times" At school, my classmates and teachers all said I was a pistachio, but in fact, I hate it when others say I am a pistachio, because only I know that my happiness is fake. Because I yearn for true happiness, I named it pistachio.
In the past, although I had a decent job and a high income, I was psychologically painful, under great work pressure, more dissatisfied with my married life, and weak in the face of my children's physical problems.
At the end of 20 14, the mental state was once depressed. As soon as I heard the phone ring, I was upset. I am most afraid of getting a call from a customer. It feels like a death call ...
The pressure of work, the disharmony of marriage, the education and health of children, and various responsibilities make me breathless. I don't know how to find a way out. Later, I was fortunate enough to embark on the road of learning psychology, Chinese medicine and traditional culture. In recent years, I have spent hundreds of thousands of yuan on various studies. Although the status in all aspects has been improved, I always feel that I still haven't found the feeling of happiness I want.
20 17 I followed the official account of wechat, which was recommended by his father. Although I know it's good for my health, because I have a great desire for food and don't study my homework, I mistakenly think that crossing the valley directly prevents us from eating, so it's simply a "fantasy" to let me cross the valley.
I always feel weak because of the severe sub-health state. I used many methods to regulate my body before, with little effect. I also had 14 days without eating meal replacement powder.
In August of 20 18, my father said to me, "there will be a free camp for drinking wind in Changsha during the eleventh period." Let's go together, but we must do our homework before going to the camp. " I agreed at once.
20 18, 16, start studying on September 3 16, watch live cereal, chew your teeth and swallow body fluids, and go hiking. Because there is always a trace of anxiety in my heart, I can't always live in the present, so I naturally do some homework in form, but I hardly do it in essence.
20 18 10 1 my father and I took our children to the free broken valley camp in Changsha, officially starting the first broken valley in my life.
I didn't feel any discomfort in the first two days, and my mental state was very good.
On the third day, I ate an apple, two red dates and food brought back by two children.
On the fourth day of the valley, although I didn't feel hungry, I was a little weak and sweated, and I didn't want to get up and do physical exercise. Originally, I just wanted to eat some egg yolk from the egg yolk lotus seed cake to supplement sugar, but I didn't expect to eat all the moon cakes.
Later, my tutor told me that this happened because I didn't do my homework well, so I resumed eating on the fourth day for the first time. But I was surprised to find that I had to be full at 7 points with my will, but after I resumed eating, I naturally didn't want to eat when I was full at 7 points. Haha, I practiced hard, but I didn't want to succeed, so my desire for food naturally declined.
Next, I carefully studied the 16 preparation class, walked in the sky, watched the boutique diary and the live broadcast of the valley, and attended the landing class. After studying, I succeeded in the valley for 3 times, 7 days, 14 days, 7 days.
After crossing the valley, my back and cervical vertebrae, which were often painful, improved, and the phenomenon of losing a lot of hair completely disappeared. But what I gained more was the study of the mind course of camping across the valley, which cleared up the fog for my health, family relationship management, children's education and career direction, and made my mind suddenly enlightened.
Health: After learning the village chief's mind method, I completely put down my previous concept of health preservation and spared my relatives around me. I no longer ask my mother to be vegetarian, not to eat fruit, not to blow air conditioning, not to exercise or sweat at night ... My heart is liberated, and the people around me are liberated and comfortable. What's important is that. At the same time, my parents and I also attended the training camp in Changsha in 1 1 month. My father also volunteered to go to Zhong Nanshan with me for retraining in April this year ... My father never said a word "good" but also praised him ... The family atmosphere has never been so happy.
Marriage: It is very strong to be taught from an early age that everything depends on yourself. At the same time, the profession of lawyer has made me accustomed to control and confrontation, debate and preaching. Through the study of psychology class, I understand that my marriage will fail because I don't know how to be a "good woman". I am very strong. I am used to treating my other half with orders and accusations, and I never praise or appreciate each other. I am an out-and-out "bad woman" ... The study of psychology class made me realize my mistakes and really learned how to run a marriage.
Children's education: I have always attached great importance to children's education and have been looking for better education. Children have been sent to private schools and schools since they were 2 years old and 9 months old. The annual tuition fee is 50,000-70,000 yuan, but the children have never reached the happy state I want. Never let children be our role models. On the contrary, we should be their role models! The study of psychology makes me understand that children's education is not in the external environment, but the most important education lies in the internal environment of the family. Parents know how to love themselves and live a truly happy state, and children naturally have the ability to be happy. So I want to be an example of children's happiness-love yourself.
At work: I have been obsessed with not liking the job of lawyer before, and I always can't find the sense of value of the job, but I have to continue for my life. Through the study of psychology class, I understand that it is because I have deep fear and lack of money, and I deeply disagree with my mission and value. Through the study of psychology class, I have a new understanding of money, self-mission and value. The reason why we earn a lot of money and want to be recognized by everyone is nothing more than to get happiness and happiness. What I have to do now is to enjoy my present life, embrace my present life, stop resisting acceptance, and stop pinning my hopes on the future after reaching a certain goal. Instead, I will follow my heart and allow myself to do more things I love while meeting the challenges at work with a relaxed and pleasant attitude. I hired an assistant, and now my work, study and life are more harmonious and happy than ever.
About self-awareness: I once refused to accept my imperfections, like to criticize, criticize and complain. I am strong and not weak, and refused to accept the fact that I am not high ... Through the study of psychology class and drinking wind class, I understand that the most fundamental reason why I can't feel happiness and happiness is that I don't know how to love myself. And when I began to love myself, I gradually accepted that I was an imperfect person. I have a lot of dark sides. I am a person who doesn't like being criticized, accused and lectured by others, but I am often criticized, accused and lectured by others. I have always been strong, but not soft enough. I have a small and exquisite figure. ...
When I tore off my mask of happiness and kindness, I really accepted my dark side and made myself a complete person. I finally really feel the comfort and happiness of being alive. The key is to accept that these dark sides have not made me worse, but made my friends feel happier, more relaxed and more free to get along with me.
When I really began to love myself, I realized the feeling of loving myself and talking about love with myself. Now happiness and happiness happen naturally every day ... I really became my own pistachio and lived the happiness I wanted. I also believe that when I build myself into a good pot, there will naturally be a good pot cover to match it.