catalogue

Chapter 1: Avoiding the Marriage Minefield

Chapter 2: What to do before marriage? Psychological premarital examination?

Chapter III: Decompression measures for blind date.

In today's society, the divorce rate keeps rising. What is the main reason? When you're in love, it's good. Why can't you run a good marriage? What are the marriage minefields? How to run a marriage? Let's study the book of happy marriage I counted.

Avoid marriage minefield

It is said that marriage is the grave of love, because the feelings between husband and wife after marriage are gradually indifferent due to various factors, and there is a crisis. How to avoid emotional crisis, we should avoid the following five marriage minefields.

Look at each other crossly.

Wen Wen and Xiaojun are college classmates. They have been in love since freshman year. After graduation, the first thing they did was to go to the civil affairs bureau to get a marriage certificate, which became a beautiful talk for a while. But it didn't last long. After marriage, the two often quarrel over trifles and criticize each other's harmony and shortcomings. With the escalation of the war, it finally developed into a cold war and ignored each other.

Expert interpretation: The main reason for this situation is that both husband and wife are violent and stubborn. When husbands or wives don't act according to their wishes, they feel dissatisfied and try their best to find fault with each other. After a long time, I feel disgusted or even disgusted with each other.

What should I do in the face of such a marriage? It's simple. Look for each other's strengths. Don't stare at each other's inaction every day, but what he has done for himself and his family. Slowly, you will find that the person you don't like is the one who suits you best.

? Gai Yi? Too many lies

Xiao Zhang is the manager of a company. He has many social activities, while his wife Wang Qian is more free. I don't know when it started. Xiao Zhang noticed that his wife often peeked at his mobile phone while washing waterfalls and going to the toilet. Because there are some women in business friends, in order not to let his wife think much, Xiao Zhang simply bought another mobile phone and installed another card. When Wang Xi discovered her husband's behavior, he became more suspicious. In order to appease his suspicious wife, he had to start lying and perfunctory. Lies always have flaws, and finally they all lose their trust in each other.

Expert interpretation: One party's dishonesty often causes the suspicion and disgust of the other party in a chain, and eventually falls into the mud pit of mutual suspicion and cannot extricate itself. Marriage can't stand hiding, don't make excuses for yourself. A stable marriage needs to be honest with each other, show your true feelings and tell the real situation you have encountered. This is the simplest solution. Sexual disharmony has a problem in Yan Fu's mind, that is, she and her husband have been married for two years, and their sexual life has been disharmony. Sometimes her husband can't get up, sometimes he has premature ejaculation. The doctor said that there was nothing wrong with her husband's health, maybe it was a psychological disorder. This matter has always been a thorny issue for the couple. & gt& gt& gt Five freckle-removing problems that women should pay most attention to.

Expert interpretation: the relationship between husband and wife is not completely based on sexual union, but if one or both parties are not satisfied in sexual life for a long time, it will definitely affect the relationship between husband and wife. In some divorce cases, emotional discord has become a substitute for sexual discord, thus becoming a legitimate basis for divorce.

For this kind of marriage, the most effective way is to find out the crux of sexual disharmony, whether it is feelings or work, or what unpleasant experiences have you had? Talk openly and try to change each other's sexual attitudes.

Different consumption concepts

Mei Jian and her husband have very different consumption ideas. What's her attitude towards money? Can you spend, earn, earn and spend? . Mr. Wang earns more money than maxine, but? Cheap? Be careful to spend every penny. Different consumption concepts often become the fuse of their quarrel.

On this day, Maxim booked a three-day accommodation of 5400 yuan in an online hotel to travel. Maxim thinks this is a guarantee of the quality of tourism, but her husband is very angry when he knows it and thinks she is too extravagant. Meixin is worried that if this continues, it will not be peaceful for a long time.

Expert Interpretation: The family's economic income and consumption problems often become the fuse of the contradiction between husband and wife. The family's economic situation should live within its means and be used rationally. It's best to talk about money when you are in love, and find ways to solve the differences as soon as possible. To solve this problem after marriage, it is best to establish a family account and discuss the specific expenses of each month.

Attitude towards elders

? Peacock girl? Ai Jia is married? Phoenix man? Li Ming, once Li Ming's parents went to the city to see the young couple. Ai Jia thinks her in-laws are rustic and don't pay attention to hygiene. She never moved her eyelids, which made her in-laws go home disappointed after only two days. The husband was extremely dissatisfied with this, so the two sides just? Real bullets? I worked hard and finally had to break up.

Expert interpretation: Should both husband and wife release? Your mother is my mother? Respect each other, so the relationship between the two sides will be more harmonious. Respecting parents is also a sign of loving the other half. When the other half sees that you are kind to your parents, they will remember your kindness. Although you want to treat your parents as your own, you can't be outspoken and have unlimited desires. You can usually go home to visit the elderly and buy some health care products to express filial piety.

What must you do before marriage? Psychological premarital examination?

About money

Instead of understanding? If you fell into the water with his mother, which one would he save? How about knowing his attitude towards money and how to distribute his savings after marriage? A person's view of money reflects his essence.

Jingjing has never talked about money with her boyfriend. She thinks it hurts to talk about money, and takes it for granted that her husband will give her a salary card after marriage. After marriage, the husband not only kept his finances secret, but also blamed Jingjing for spending money indiscriminately. The two often quarrel about who pays for the month and how much to give their parents. When it comes to money, he seems to be a different person. ?

Things you should know before marriage

1 His views on AA system. You can try to put forward the idea of going Dutch at dinner. If he accepts it frankly, it means that he may also want AA to spend money on your family after marriage, from property, water to monthly payment, raising children and supporting parents.

Before you get married, you must find opportunities to make him spend a lot of money for you. The so-called large sum of money is not enough to bankrupt him, but five to ten times more than the money he is willing to spend for himself on weekdays. Please forget for a moment that thrift is a virtue. A man who is too thrifty in love often just feels that it is not worth paying money and anything else for you.

When money is not enough, does he think of making more money or cutting expenses first? This question helps to define whether he is a pioneer potential stock or a conservative blue chip stock. Both are good, but for materialistic women, potential stocks will be more helpful to meet your future needs.

About what? Cardiovascular?

Work pressure and fast pace of life, kidney deficiency and cardiovascular diseases have become the main killers threatening human beings. Compared with a fragile heart, what does a fragile nerve belong to? Cardiovascular? . Men's melancholy, weakness, childishness and narrow-mindedness will be infinitely magnified by life. Although the husband is a woman's first son, a woman can never find a husband by the standard of finding a son.

When the earthquake struck Japan, Lucy's boyfriend suddenly got it? Armageddon phobia? . Even if he didn't want to go to work, Weibo kept brushing his screen. One minute I called her to tell her that nuclear radiation had reached Singapore, and the next minute I texted her that there had been a major earthquake in Beijing in recent three years. Lucy was troubled by him, began to be suspicious and was warned by her best friend. Such a fragile man must never get married. Don't expect him to mature, he will only grow old! ?

During the preparation of the wedding, Li Lan had frequent contact with her future husband's colleagues and friends, and found that when he was with them, he was cynical and foul-mouthed, and his closest friend was either unemployed or prepared to lose his job. Li Lan hesitated to get married, but she found that she didn't fully understand him.

Things you should know before marriage

1 What kind of people are his friends? Friends are our mirrors. If you are always alone with him, being together is nothing more than flirting and being very much in love, then you only know one-fifth of him.

How does he view stress and frustration? If he always feels a lot of pressure, it can only show that his ability to resist pressure is poor. If he always complains about his incompetence, it can only show that his emotional intelligence is low. If he always says that he is busy, it only shows that he is not good at managing time. The problems in everyone's life are actually their own problems, and every loser is used to putting the blame on others. If there are problems in marriage in the future, he will only blame you for not loving him enough or having a bad temper.

About double beds

Some people say that chastity is the best dowry for girls. This sounds literary enough, but the following question is, if a girl gets married with this good dowry, but finds that the boy can't get it, should she change the archway until she dies?

Before getting married, Claire knew that her boyfriend's sexual ability was normal, but she thought that her requirements were not too strong, and they were even and brought out the best in each other. What she didn't expect was that after marriage, her husband declined much faster than she thought, followed by premature ejaculation and impotence. What's more, her desire is more like a flower that blooms every spring.

Things you should know before marriage

1 At present, men with average ability may plummet with acceleration after marriage; At present, the average ability of women, at least before the age of 40, is increasing year by year. The importance of sex will not only end with marriage, but also become more important. Even now, there is no problem with your asexual marriage, and it may become an atomic bomb that destroys relationships in the future.

Even if you really decide to take chastity as the best dowry, you need one or two experienced girlfriends to evaluate your boyfriend's ability in bed from appearance and intuition. But the most trustworthy thing is your mother's words. If your mother's evaluation of your future boyfriend is that you are in poor health, you basically don't have to ask what's wrong.

It's said that personality is incompatible, but it's actually sexual.

I read 15 questions that American marriage experts must ask before marriage in European and American magazines. I think we need to technically investigate the hidden dangers of marriage, except the one about faith.

1. Do we want children? If so, who is mainly responsible?

2. What are our earning power and goals? Will there be a conflict between consumption view and saving view?

3. How do we maintain our family? Who will grasp the possible risks?

4. Have we communicated the medical history of both sides in detail? Impotence, infertility, kidney deficiency, including mental illness.

5. Does our parents' attitude meet our expectations? Will you give enough blessings? If not, how should we face it?

6. Do we naturally and frankly express our sexual needs, preferences and fears?

7. Can I put a TV in the bedroom?

8. Can you really listen to each other and treat each other's ideas and complaints fairly?

9. Do we have a clear understanding of each other's spiritual needs and beliefs? Have we discussed the children's future education model and beliefs?

10. Do we like and respect each other's friends?

1 1. Can we respect each other's parents? Have we considered that our parents might interfere in our relationship?

12. What bothers you most about my family?

13. Is there anything that we will never give up because of marriage?

14. If one of us needs to leave home to accompany the other person to work in other places, is it ok?

15. Are we confident to face any challenges and let our marriage develop forward?

Decompression of blind date

In a blind date program currently broadcast, a male guest won the favor of many girls at the scene with his gentle temperament. But when he is nervous, his expression is abnormal, and his words fail to convey his meaning. In the face of the female guests' questions, he is so anxious that he can't squeeze out an answer for a long time. Experts suggest chewing gum to relax. Scientific research shows that the level of friendly alcohol is directly proportional to the sense of stress, while when chewing gum, the level of saliva cortisol drops obviously, which shows that. Brain waves have increased. What else? The weakening of brain waves is closely related to the emergence of tension and anxiety, from which it can be inferred that chewing gum can not only preserve health, but also relax the mood.

In addition, the survey also shows that deep breathing, drinking water and going to the toilet are all the decompression secrets that many blind date men and women often choose. You can also try some simple ways to relieve stress before dating, such as chewing gum, listening to music, tapping your temples and so on.