Xiao Jing, a college roommate, just got divorced last month. She changed the signature in her circle of friends to: unmarried girls, don't get married casually for any reason!

Xiao Jing and her ex-husband met through a family blind date five years ago. At that time, the ex-husband's family had been engaged in coal mining business for many years, and it was also a leading wealthy family in the local area. The son is an only child, and the old couple's future business and family business are naturally inherited to the future son. Xiao Jing's parents are also very happy that their daughter is about to join such a wealthy family.

For Xiao Jing, coming to the city from her hometown to study, she is eager for free love. However, in the face of a series of desperate phone calls from her parents and relatives in her hometown, she is worried about her growing age. In desperation, Xiao Jing had to get into trouble under everyone's persuasion, and quickly registered marriage with her ex-husband after graduation.

Shortly after marriage, the state supervised the private exploitation and management of rare resources. All the coal mines operated by individuals and individuals were forced to close down, and her husband's business was forced to close down. The living expenses of the whole family fell on the newlyweds for a while.

Later, when I saw Xiao Jing's circle of friends, almost all of them were words of resentment. From her life, I saw a female image full of resentment and boredom. Once the lively and cheerful girl on campus disappeared.

But, girl, I want to tell you that getting married casually because of age and others' urging will eventually drag you into darkness.

02

People's prejudice against women's age has a long history, and this superficial discrimination against older women has already penetrated into the bone marrow.

There are too many people around us, talking about the upcoming love, coping with the upcoming marriage and planning the upcoming wedding. Many people can't wait to marry themselves hastily just because they are of marriageable age. Faced with threats and inducements from my family and the pressure of public opinion, I was forced to compromise and married a similar person.

Bi Shumin once wrote a sentence in the book:

In fact, it was not marriage that changed our feelings, but we chose to compromise from the beginning. Everyone knows how difficult it is to meet a teenager in white in a limited youth, and it takes some effort and luck, so everyone replaced effort with choice from the beginning.

03

A happy marriage comes from your persistence.

I once read a story on the Internet: The author told me that her 45-year-old aunt, who is about to get married, has been young and beautiful since she was in her twenties, and there are countless suitors. But when I didn't meet a suitable suitor, my aunt decisively left her original post and started her own business while constantly improving her academic qualifications.

In her thirties, she bought her own house and attached great importance to her external image. Beauty, yoga, fitness dance have not left behind. Finally, at the age of 40, she met the other half she liked and finally got married.

Maybe this is the meaning of waiting. I believe that the aunt in the story, when she was young, saw others show off her husband drying the baby, but at the same time she was very sad. She is also looking forward to having a home under the light of the Spring Festival holiday. But her yearning and persistence in a beautiful marriage can make her resist the temptation of the outside world and the pressure of others and wait for the right person.

Thinking that the actor Wang was unmarried when he was on the column of "Art Life", the host asked him:

"Why don't you get married? What kind of person are you looking for? "

Wang said, "I want to find someone who can talk at any time."

So, girls, you see, a good marriage is based on our choice. Choose people who share the same topic and language with you, and choose people who share the same interests with us. Don't let your compromise and make do ruin your marriage.

(Day 40 of the fourth 90-day training camp)