A stone in my heart finally fell to the ground, but it really hit my foot!

I want to work hard, or others will say that I am nothing but good-looking.

Don't fall in love with someone because of brain water, in case the brain water runs dry one day.

6. It is said that women are made of water, and so am I! It's just that I'm made of soda and irritable.

7. I hope my Mr. Right can borrow it in colorful auspicious clouds. I didn't expect that. You ride it. A pug came to marry me.

I feel at home this summer. Wasting your life, going out feels like suicide.

9. As long as you take the initiative, we will have a story. If you want to be bold, we not only have reasons. Things, maybe children.

10. Don't pretend, you can see through it at a glance.

1 1. It's not easy to cheat if you look good. The invigilator couldn't help but take a look. No wonder they were often found in those years.

12. Seeing others working so hard, so diligent and so energetic on the road to success, ask yourself, don't you want to be a stumbling block to them?

13. It is said that everyone in China touches their mobile phone on average 150 times a day. I smiled. This is sheer nonsense. Obviously, I woke up once and picked it up and put it down before going to bed.

14. Tell me if you like me. People have to experience the feeling of being rejected by beautiful women all their lives.

15. Congratulations on living another day and winning the lottery. Come again.

16. Xiong Haizi folded a paper crane and threw it in my face. He said he was playing with angry birds. This child is so cute, no! Does he mean I'm a pig?

17. The funniest plot in TV dramas and movies is that when killing people, white knives go in and white knives go out.

18. People who have read books can sensitively distinguish their parents' steps, turn off the computer, TV or mobile phone within 20 seconds, spread out their homework and pick up a pen.

19. I'm going to meet each other's parents tomorrow. I'm so nervous. After all, I hit his child first.

20. How to solve your worries is only to get rich.

2 1. Some people like your face, some people like your voice, some people like your personality, some people like your life, but I am different. I don't like you.

22. Hard life needs no explanation.

23. I have returned all the heavy rains I missed in those years to you these days.

When I was a child, I played with cats and mice. My cat went home when all the mice were hidden.

Thank you for coming to see me after my death. To repay you, I will also visit you at 12 tonight.

26. Even if I am stupid, it doesn't matter to you.

27. There are always a few friends who are very gentle when they first met, and after a few days, they don't know which hospital they were discharged from.

Laughing is better than saying funny short sentences.

1. I want to be your little sun, either to warm you or to burn you.

Seeing that you want to pretend, I can only choose to be your best audience.

3. Everyone else is holding hands, but I am holding the dog by the hand. Let's take a walk and have a look to see who bites people unhappy.

Time is a butcher's knife, only suitable for good-looking people. It can do nothing for ugly people.

As I get older, my youth fades away. Why don't I leave the zit that accompanied my whole adolescence?

6. I love to eat naturally, and I feel so hungry if I don't eat.

7. I especially like smiling. After all, the newly made porcelain teeth are very expensive.

8. Four tragedies in life: ability is not worthy of dreams, income is not worthy of enjoyment, appearance is not worthy of affectation, and knowledge is not worthy of age.

9. I didn't like to eat when I was a child, which led to my short stature now; I love eating now, which makes me fat and short. Embrace your chubby self in danger.

10. The bittersweet thing in life is to brush your teeth, holding a cup in your left hand and washing utensils in your right hand.

1 1. You like to talk sarcastically. Are you born with essential balm and cool oil?

12. Not only am I lucky, but my beriberi is also good.

13. Your appearance is so obscure that I can only concentrate on understanding.

14. I finally understood in tears that some people can't lose weight once they get fat!

15. At present, I am wasting time, I am wasting time, I am blurring the present, and I am afraid of the future.

16. In today's society, it is useless to cook raw rice into cooked rice. Even if it turns into popcorn, the runner will still run.

17. As an optimistic person in others' eyes, you are probably hanging to death, and everyone thinks you are swinging.

18. Anonymous looks in the mirror at night and looks at his white body! Sigh: Good cabbage! Why can't I find a pig?

19. As long as you are thin, everything is omnipotent. If you are fat, everything is useless.

20. From then on, there were eight famines in the four seas, and from generation to generation, it was just you and me, without us.

2 1. In fact, we can boil all the problems down to two kinds: one is hungry without food, and the other is full.

22. If you feel tired like a dog all day. You really misunderstood. Dogs are not as tired as you.

23. I want to be a gentle person, but gentleness has depreciated.

24. People who can't write well are because the speed of their hands can't keep up with the thinking of their brains. To put it bluntly, the uglier you write, the smarter you are!

25. A man has four hopes: a cook at home, a good-looking one in the office, a bitch beside him and a young lady in the distance.

26. Smile at the person you hate. Be as arrogant as you want.

27. If our relationship is weak, add some salt.

28. After taking the exam for so many years, why not have an anniversary celebration? For example, if you have taken 40 exams, you will take 20 exams; If you pass two courses, you will get one; Take two courses and you will be exempted from the exam.

29. You have an expression that only your mother will like. It's over if you don't work hard.

30. I'm glad to find twenty cents. When I picked it up carefully, I was glad that it was in 1982. It should be overdue.

3 1. The wife's initials are Lp and the beautiful initials are pL. I suddenly understood that a wife is often the opposite of beauty.

32. Everyone loves life, and it's really nice to see Bloom's beauty.

33. If today's girl walks in the ancient streets and is dragged back by the emperor to wait on her bed and wash her face at night, will she be convicted of bullying the monarch and so on?

34. Go, dye it green, and don't wear a cuckold.

35. With your looks, you don't need to lose weight at all. Now you can use obesity as an excuse for ugliness, but after losing weight, there is no excuse.

36. It is said that liking a person is too tired, so I like several, and I find it more tired!

I accidentally missed my destination by taking a taxi. When I was in a hurry, my brain twitched and shouted at the driver: Xu is still vibrato!

38. Your complex facial features can't hide your simple IQ!

39. A person will feel lonely when eating, but not when eating snacks.

40. Those who can't get through are just because their legs are short!

4 1. I'm not RMB, why does everyone like me?

42. We agreed to grow old together, so let's dye a cream.

43. You are so stupid, can you study?

44. It was also put on hold for a month before the oranges began to wrinkle and the apples were rotten. Such a thick skin is of great significance to life.

45. As long as you are willing to accompany me to suffer hardships, I will be a tiger down the mountain for you.

46. Even if it's not good, it's my life, not your business.

47. May you have wine, meat and girls in the future, and girls are ugly.

48. Stop it, there is nothing to talk about between you and me except love.

49. Young people are not crazy. What can I say when I am old?

50. Don't be too proud, you are not special.

5 1. We can't talk about anything except love.

52. Knowledge is like underwear; it is invisible but important.

53. Staying up late is the mother of acne.

54. How can bangs grow so fast?

55. The oath is just a slip of the tongue.

56. It's terrible that a cow plays the piano at you.

57. You have a big lung capacity, and you can brag.

58. Beating is kissing, scolding is love, and love is extremely deep.

59. I can't swear, but I can't swear.

60. I hit the south wall, but I want to knock it down.

6 1. I used to be a local tyrant and a fake local tyrant.

62. Learn not to be angry first, and then learn to make people angry.

Funny than funny.

1. Because the triangle is fixed, the love triangle is stable.

2. The furthest distance in the world is not between life and death, but between you and me.

I always have a question: What did the first person in the world know that milk can be drunk do to the cow?

4. I'm sorry, I didn't grow up to be what you like, didn't develop your favorite personality, and didn't make you move.

5, my future husband is definitely a road idiot, otherwise why can't I find it now!

6. When you speak ill of me, can you feel like cooking without embellishing it?

7. He can break white shorts into chrysanthemums when he farts.

8. Hey, who's that? I have never seen a purer child than Telunsu.

9. I regard money as dirt and my father regards me as a septic tank.

10, why did Chang 'e fly to the moon = = Houyi shoot for nine days, even the gods couldn't stand it.

1 1. Watching time in bed every morning is not to get up, but to see how long you can sleep.

12, whether the thin man says he is fat or embarrassed, the fat man will think that the thin man is showing off.

13. What are the two little draggers on the giraffe's head? Some people say that it is a deer walker, and the zoo wifi depends on it!

14, if you want to fight, I will fight! I have a line of fire. I'm stupid.

15, when Russia put on wedding clothes. When you put on the cassock. This kind of life is enough for Russia.

16, the mood at work is heavier than going to the grave.

17, the sky is gray, the eyes are boundless, and the days without money are too long!

18, Doraemon said: Daxiong, what you want is not me, just that pocket.

19, you are not too handsome, but too ugly!

20. The idiom "an instant hit" actually describes female artists in ancient and modern times, at home and abroad.

2 1, when you hear the bell, take out your mobile phone first, and then start the most boring thing in life.

I have a little donkey. I ride a date, and someone else drives a Ferrari. I am never surprised.

The furthest distance in the world is not between life and death, but from Monday morning to Friday afternoon.

24. I keep a low profile because I can't keep a high profile.

25. Since you can't afford to drive a bike, drive hard!

Tell me when you want to marry a daughter-in-law, and I will marry you.

27. Husband is like a dog on the side of the road. Whoever has the ability will be taken away.

28. I am not a good horse, but I am definitely not an ordinary donkey.

29. The sun shone in the sky and all the flowers died.

30. If you don't deteriorate in silence, you will be abnormal in silence.

3 1, whenever the school is cleaned, it will say "You should regard the school as your home"! Whenever you are late, say "You think school is your home"!

32. Heaven makes you die, God makes you disappear, and people make us part.

33. Who says being short is bad? Don't talk to me with your head down if you dare.

34. If two people are together for a long time, gazing at each other is also a romantic thing.

35. I don't like to tidy my room. They all call me a messy room hero.

36. It's good to listen to English songs. After listening for half a year, I am not tired, because I don't understand.

37. The little girl selling flowers pulled me: "Big Brother, buy flowers, and you will know that you are a playboy at a glance."

38. If I throw you to Africa, you won't say your girlfriend is black.

39. People who cheat Russian feelings will hurt you rhythmically.

40. Life is too short to miss.

4 1, spring has come, and someone has followed.

42. Since ancient times, no one has died. Bitch dies first, then I die.

43, alas ~ you look so sad, I really admire your courage to live.

You have the right to remain silent, but everything you say will be your last words.

45, the world is so big, why only take me a spoonful.

46. The world is so big, I feel so unlucky to know you.

47. "Happiness" means eating and sleeping.

48. The success of a person's life depends on the memorial service.

49. I never dare to think about whether tomorrow will be better. I just want to eat my next meal.

50. Come on, you live like a jack-o'-lantern, and you want to illuminate others?

Funny sentences. Tell me the funniest sentence in history?

1. In order to prevent myself from spending money indiscriminately, I decided to choose a friend to save money for me. You can send Alipay to me, and I will announce which friend is so shameless tomorrow night. 2. I was scolded by my girlfriend for doing something wrong, and then she farted before I answered her. Then I let one go, and she said, Yo, how dare you talk back? Finally broke the tough atmosphere. . . 3. It is the season of bathing by perseverance, washing by endurance and getting up by explosiveness. 4. I prefer to sleep until noon every day. You pick me up and say to me: I made shredded pork with fish flavor, braised pork ribs, tomatoes, scrambled eggs, spicy soup, mutton kebabs, almond tea, dried beans, fried beans, tiger skin peppers, beef powder, spicy eggs, pancakes, fruit Chinese hamburger, rolled noodles, Xi 'an mutton bread in soup, Korean cold noodles and fried chicken legs. Get up. In the elevator, a man and a woman quarreled. This lady seems to want to buy a bag. This man is too expensive. The woman won't buy it for me. I tell you, there are many people who want to buy me a bag! The man said angrily, what do you look like? Don't you have a B number in your heart? ! The woman is anxious: What am I like? What is wrong with me? The man pointed at me and said to the woman, you are uglier than her without makeup. I didn't offend you. 6. After work today, I saw an old man dragging a rope into the elevator. I looked at it and wondered. . . Grandpa suddenly turned around and shouted, Mom, where's my dog? I immediately burst into laughter, old man, how dare you walk such a long rope! 7. The company opened a new shoe store downstairs, and the opening guests have a discount. I tried on my right foot and bought a pair of leather shoes. When I got home, I found that both shoes were right feet! I went back to the store and found my boss. The boss quickly apologized, saying that it was the first time to open a store, and he didn't have much experience. He also brought me another pair of leather shoes with the same model from the warehouse. After returning home, I found this pair of leather shoes, both left feet. 8. In the morning, the child was naughty and was beaten by his father. At noon, his father: Hey, son, are you still angry? Your mother asked me to hit you. Me: That's what I said. You really played. . Son: Hum, none of them are good things! Both of us. . . 9. I was on a business trip in other places, and suddenly I had something urgent, so I found a bathroom. When I finished, I found that I forgot to bring my paper, so I knocked on my neighbor's door on the left and asked. Dude: Do you have any paper? The neighbor on the left replied, I will go. I also forgot my paper. Knock on the neighbor on the right and ask, dude, do you have any paper? A few seconds later, I heard a sister answer: sorry, big brother, I went to the wrong toilet. 10. It rained heavily, so it was difficult to get on the bus. After a while, I saw a beautiful woman waving. The driver stopped and the beautiful woman asked for a carpool. My heart is pounding, oh yeah! The driver looked back at me and I nodded wildly. The driver said: You got off the bus, and there was no charge just now 1 1. My little daughter said that a little boy in kindergarten found fault with her every day, which made me very angry. Wife: Have you figured out a way to deal with him? My youngest daughter gnashed her teeth and said, I decided to marry him when I grow up and not give him pocket money. Go shopping to buy clothes when you are unhappy. When I get angry, let him kneel on the washboard and treat him the way you treated my dad! Wife: