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When is a woman the hardest? Women today, of course. On the one hand, you should be beautiful, on the other hand, you should be a good wife and mother, and on the other hand, you should be able to earn money to support your family.
Nowadays, women are generally under great pressure to survive, because if they are weaker, they will be ridiculed in all aspects.
If a woman only knows how to earn money by going to work, not having children and not doing housework, then the family pressure will be great. In addition to her husband's unhappiness, the elders at home will also be unhappy. On the other hand, if a woman only takes care of her children at home and doesn't work and earn money, she is useless waste in the eyes of her husband and in-laws.
So opening a circle of friends now is simply an inspirational photo of modern women.
My friend Jia Jia sends dozens of friends every day, selling all kinds of cosmetics, clothes, shoes and bags, and even snacks. Do you think she is just a simple WeChat business? No, no, no, she is also a staunch punching member of a book club.
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Jia Jia graduated from a private university and worked in a private enterprise after graduation.
When I got married and got pregnant at the age of 24, my husband was not a reliable person, and the environment was relatively narrow, surrounded by a housekeeper with children. So Jia Jia became a housewife after giving birth. Because her mother-in-law didn't help, her husband had to go to work, and Jia Jia took care of the children alone.
It's hard enough to take care of children, and it's even harder to bear the pressure of life.
Although Jia Jia's husband has been working, he hardly gives Jia Jia living expenses. Jia Jia's expenses such as taking care of children and family expenses after delivery are all saved by going to work before delivery. If she asks her husband for money, they will definitely quarrel. After several times, Jia Jia was heartbroken and stopped asking her husband for money.
However, if her daughter wants to eat milk powder, she should eat it herself. Only a little is saved. How does she live?
Jia Jia belongs to the kind of woman who has to find a way to survive if someone gives her food, not to mention having a daughter to raise.
So Jia Jia found a sidewalk in a vegetable market near where she lives. Actually, it's an illegal building, but the store rent is cheap. Jia Jia risked the closure of the store and started to open a shop, make children's clothes and sell some children's toys by the way.
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Jiajia goes to the small shop in the vegetable market early every day, because her aunts like to buy food early, which sometimes leads to several transactions.
Jiajia sells goods as long as she can make money. Sometimes she sells goods in the morning, goes to the wholesale market to get goods in the afternoon, and rides an electric car to drive her daughter back and forth several times to earn money.
Business goes on slowly like this. Excluding store rent, utilities and other expenses, you can earn 1000 yuan a month, not to mention more than 2,000 yuan.
Jia Jia has done a good job in small businesses. The key is to earn money while taking care of children. Although the money is relatively small, the children have enough money for milk powder, and Jia Jia is very satisfied.
Later, Jia Jia also learned to sell goods online, and gradually many people in the same city asked her to buy things. Jia Jia delivers several shipments every day, riding an electric car with her daughter, of course. When buyers see a woman taking care of her children so hard, they all feel that Jia Jia is not easy. When they see the right one, they will also take care of the business in Jia Jia.
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After living like this for more than two years, Jiajia's daughter can go to kindergarten and Jiajia's shop is closed. At this time, Jia Jia began to re-enter the social work, still doing her old job, helping people make drawings and design drafts.
This time, Jia Jia became more chicken blood. She not only went to work during the day, but also accepted the endorsement of WeChat business and participated in a punching activity of a book club. Get up at 5: 30 every morning, punch in and read books, and keep making friends.
At home, she also shoulders heavy economic responsibilities. Jiajia has never lived by her husband.
After several years of marriage, Jia Jiayi has to bear the children's expenses alone, especially now. Jia Jia never sends any message about her husband in her circle of friends. To her, her husband is just a decoration.
I thought Jia Jia's husband would continue to be a Buddhist, but when Jia Jia's husband learned that Jia Jia lived a full life every day, his reaction was very interesting.
Jia Jia's husband said helplessly, "What can I do? She can toss if she wants. As long as she takes good care of her daughter and me, she has no other thoughts, as long as she doesn't toss about divorce. Now women are too inspirational, what can I do? "
This is ridiculous and angry. As a husband and father, I didn't do my husband's duty and my father's heart. Instead, he said sarcastically, "What can I do?" Watching my wife finish her work.
"Don't take due responsibility." This is probably one of the reasons why some women don't want to get married now.
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I once read a very popular book,1Jin Zhiying born in 1982. It tells the story of Korean women's difficult survival after World War II, and the growth experience of women after 1980s.
We found that not only China, but also South Korea has a difficult mother-in-law, and South Korea is also patriarchal, and there are conflicts between brothers and sisters in South Korea, and Korean women also have a crisis of survival.
Slightly different, China women's living space and opportunities are mostly flexible. Because girls like Jia Jia are willing to create a better life for themselves through their own efforts.
What is more different is that the husband of Jin Zhiying, the heroine of Jin Zhiying, born in 1982, is more considerate, while Jia Jia's husband fails to fulfill his family responsibilities.
This is probably the fundamental reason why women in China are both anxious and inspirational. They work harder because of anxiety. On the other hand, their husbands can only stand by and think it's good, at least they don't have to work so hard to support their families.
In the final analysis, many men are still selfish now. After marriage, they still care about themselves as before, ignoring their wives and children.
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However, on the other hand, although the husband can't rely on him, he can only rely on himself, but at least he has confidence in this family and this marriage, and he won't rely on his husband for everything.
And such an independent woman who does not depend on her husband is often more afraid of the sudden change of marriage. On the contrary, men are more afraid of women leaving themselves. Just like Jia Jia's husband, even if he doesn't take the responsibility as husband and father, he is still afraid that Jia Jia is not tossing about life, but divorce.
Therefore, women, no matter when, still have to rely on their own efforts to give themselves the life they want, make themselves more confident, and don't let men lead them by the nose.
Women are too capable, not because they are capable, but because if they are not capable, they can only live passively all day. This kind of life, in addition to trembling, in addition to anxiety and irritability, in addition to quarreling and being complained, there is something left.