The steps are as follows: (1) Find a quiet and comfortable place, sit down, take a deep breath and relax.

(2) Pay attention to the subconscious in the body, thank it and ask it to let you communicate with your past self. Please let the subconscious show this growing self, that is, a situation with sights and sounds.

(3) Concentrate on repeating the above requirements to the subconscious in good faith until a past self (mostly childhood self, hereinafter referred to as "child") appears in your mind. If the subconscious doesn't respond to the request, first take a deep breath to calm yourself down, then communicate with the subconscious, and promise that this method is safe and stop at any time when necessary, and then repeatedly ask the subconscious for cooperation, and try to use this skill to deal with some things that need to be dealt with, so as to have more success and happiness.

(4) When a child appears in the brain, (observe what the child is doing, as well as his inner state and emotional feelings). If you have only one figure in your mind and can't see clearly or face clearly, you can continue to do it and the situation will be improved by half. Tell your child that you are what he looks like after many years. You have experienced a lot of learning and growth over the years, and now you come back to thank him, help him, support him, protect him and stay with him.

(5) If the child feels that he does not accept himself (self-blame). Tell him that after so many years of growth, you have mastered many abilities and skills to deal with things and situations more effectively. But at that time, he had not learned these skills. He can only handle everything with the knowledge and ability he had at that time. He doesn't know what to do better, and no one teaches him how to do better. In fact, he did a good job. Look at your present situation, which is proof. Then, use words to affirm children's abilities (such as curiosity, vitality, wanting to break through, wanting to grow, wanting to be accepted by others, wanting to be happier, wanting to help themselves, wanting to protect themselves, and trying to live a good day).

(6) If you feel that your child has the mentality of blaming others (such as parents, family members, or people who have hurt him). Tell him that these people had not learned how to play their roles at that time, and they could only do their best with the knowledge and ability they had at that time. Tell children that there are some positive motives behind what those people do, and they do it only to satisfy those motives, not for the children. We can now understand many of these positive motives, although we can't fully understand them. In fact, they can have different ways to satisfy those motives without hurting their children, but they don't understand and no one teaches them how to do better. In fact, these people are the motivation for children to learn things when they grow up. What you did and won't do today proves this. Then, use words to affirm the child's ability to learn from what happened. For example, I was abused by my father when I was a child, and now I know how to be a better father. )

(7) If you feel disgusted and resistant to children. Tell yourself that children were hard at that time. No one taught him a lot of things you know today, and no one gave him enough help and inspiration. At that time, the child was so lonely, helpless, worried, hardworking and scared, but he was still so strong that he faced every day and worked hard to grow up. No matter how difficult it is, children are studying and growing hard. He is constantly trying to make himself better, so that today you have mastered so much knowledge and ability and enjoyed so much life.

If you still don't accept the children at that time, think about it: 1, only his hard work and persistence made you have today's life and all kinds of opportunities, but he didn't get your affirmation. If you don't accept him, who will? Nobody wants it. How pitiful is the child?

2. Without him, you have no past, so what do you have left? . . . . . . Nothing, because all your abilities, including the ability to lose your temper and hate, are cultivated by your past. Your past is the platform for all your abilities. From the platform, you have the opportunity to continue to grow. Repeat these two points if necessary until the child is accepted.

(8) Look at the child and think about the loneliness, hesitation, helplessness and even fear of the child at that time; At the same time, think about his courage and hard work; Think more about his curiosity, love, motivation, desire to get in touch with people, and the vitality of growing up. Tell him what's on your mind, tell him your gratitude and sympathy, let him know what you think, and let him talk to you. Find affirmation and recognition acceptable to both sides in the dialogue until both sides completely forgive and accept each other. (Look at the changes of children in the scene in the middle of the process, pay attention to the changes of children's expressions and body language, until the children calm down, have a positive sense of security, and even smile, and can look at themselves. This process takes some time)

(9) Now watch the child stretch out his hands and say to him, "It's time for us to be together. The confusion, groping and anxiety of the past so many years have now become the past. I thank you for doing so much for me, because I can grow because of you. I will use this ability developed over the years to protect, take care of and love you. " Imagine a child coming step by step. Finally, he accepted your hand, and you pulled him over and held him in your arms, feeling the strength you gave him to make him relaxed, confident, calm and satisfied without fear or hesitation. Feel the power inside him and how this power can make you more complete and better able to deal with the things that need to be dealt with in life. Feel him lean his head on his shoulder, and then whisper something in his ear that only the two of you know, to affirm how powerful the combination of the two will be (your name). Listen to what he said in your ear again. Only the two of you know how your can make (your name) live better and have a more successful and happy life. Say to the children: we will never be apart again, and we will move forward happily together in life. Then completely open your heart, accept the child and feel the feeling of two people merging together. When you feel good, take a deep breath and inhale deeply, and strengthen and store this feeling throughout your body.

(10) fully enjoy this power, then open your eyes when you are satisfied, and thank your subconscious for your support.