"That's for sure, very sure. I'm 20 years old. I'm afraid people won't like me. At the age of 40, I have the ability to make myself happy. I don't care what others say. "
This is a 40-year-old speech by actor Song Jia, which is quite touching.
In the eyes of many people, when a woman reaches middle age, she seems to have lost her passion and ambition when she was young.
As we all know, 40 is the best age for women who know how to live.
As Jiang Yang said:
The amazing time of middle-aged women is no longer the beautiful face of youth, but the elegance and calmness of wisdom precipitation.
After careful observation, we found that women who are still beautiful at the age of forty have the following six characteristics.
0 1
Some people say that a woman is at her best with a smile on her mouth and confidence on her face.
No matter how disturbed the outside world is, she can move forward calmly and firmly.
When Yan Ning, a famous scientist, was listening to a lecture, a girl asked her how to face the pressure of life.
It turns out that, like Yan Ning, she is obsessed with scientific research, but she is often accused and kidnapped by secular standards in her life.
Many people don't understand, but there are also many complaints. ...
This made her very tired but helpless.
Yan Ning simply replied:
Everyone will face pressure, and different voices will be encountered in each period.
But what is really terrible is not the eyes of the world, but your own caring heart.
If you keep living in the eyes of others, you will eventually get lost in your own heart.
The greatest charm of a person is actually not what others say, but how you live.
Li Qingzhao, a poet, said, "Why is light blue and deep red the first among flowers?"
Unfavorable, be brave to be yourself, and you can live more and more advanced.
If you don't flatter the world, you can live a wonderful life with determination in your heart.
02
The appearance of middle-aged people is not only a projection of life, but also a manifestation of the heart.
People who are eager for quick success and instant benefit are hard to get close to; But people with a calm mind often have unexpected surprises.
The book The Limits of Growth tells the legendary story of a middle-aged woman.
She is an assistant in a photo studio. She looks ordinary, but she is very popular because of her hard work.
One day, the community leader invited her to manage the local boy scouts as a volunteer, and she shook her head again and again.
"I didn't graduate from college and have no confidence to educate my children."
Unable to withstand repeated requests, she reluctantly agreed to help for six weeks.
Unexpectedly, she has been working for 8 years.
Because the children don't want her to leave.
People often say that the more serious, the luckier.
At the age of 54, she was appointed as an executive director; At the age of 60, he was appointed as the CEO of Boy Scouts and won the Presidential Medal of Freedom.
Even more amazing, she was awarded an honorary doctorate by 23 famous schools, including West Point Military Academy, and was invited to teach the course of "Leadership".
When someone asked her the secret of success, she waved and explained:
The greatest wisdom in life is to focus on every moment and do everything with your heart.
This is not only an ability, but also a realm.
Take your time and do every role well, so that you can be different.
03
"After the fifteenth day of the first month, the light will be less, and people will have a rest in middle age."
In the eyes of many people, struggle belongs to youth, and peace and stability are the background color of middle-aged women.
However, there is no doubt that Shi Xiaonuo, the host of CCTV, changed from "silly and sweet" to "strong woman" in one year.
In the first half of her life, she was smooth sailing, became the anchor of CCTV and went to work on time every day.
Life seems glamorous, but she always has a desire to break through herself.
When she was 40 years old, she decided to put it into action: making a new program telling the story of big coffee.
Although she has no experience in interviewing and directing, she carefully understands the process of every growth.
Hit a wall and seriously reflect; If something goes wrong, adjust it in time.
Three years later, the first season of Meet the Big Coffee was gorgeous and extraordinary.
Shi Xiaonuo has also changed from a simple host to an independent filmmaker.
It's not too late to stand at the age of 40 and write:
Only by enduring the grinding pain can we have a bright life.
Every time you grow up, you need to pay hard. Although you are struggling, you will eventually meet yourself better and gain a richer future.
04
I was very touched when I saw an interview.
Carman Lee, 55, was asked:
"If you had to live your life over again, would you make up for it?"
Carman Lee said firmly:
Once, she gave up her career for love, stayed away from her friends, trapped herself at home, and almost committed suicide due to depression.
Fortunately, family let her slowly out of the emotional black hole, and she finally understood that when people are alive, they always have to look forward.
So she began to live in the present:
In the sweat of fitness, I gained an enviable figure;
I found a confident smile in the busy filming;
In the memory of writing a book, let go of the past and move towards a broader life. ...
Writer Lu Yao said:
Instead of indulging in the past that you can't go back, you should stare at the promising future.
Let go of the past, the past will be clear, and the future can be expected.
05
When people reach middle age, the greatest consciousness is to put away their grievances and find their own way.
Even if you cry all over the floor for a while, you can dry your tears the next time and make yourself a team.
In the movie "Woman Forty", the heroine, A E, has a hard life.
If she wants to eat a fish to celebrate her birthday, she has to wait until the fish turns white before buying it at the price of "dead fish"
But even if you are careful, you can't stand the baptism of life.
My father-in-law has dementia, my husband is very busy at ordinary times, and A 'e's life is a mess.
To make matters worse, the company has entered a new person, who is gradually marginalized because she often asks for leave.
Embarrassed at home and abroad, A E collapsed and cried, "I'm tired. I can't stand it anymore."
However, the cries of mature women are always weak and powerful.
Wiping away tears, Aoe faced difficulties and encouraged herself: "Don't cry, don't worry."
In the end, with the efforts of Aoe, the couple survived adversity and difficulties.
There is a good saying:
The so-called sober, is not chaotic in the heart, looking up at the stars in the mire.
The so-called maturity is to accept the reality and move forward with hope.
06
I once saw a question: "When people reach a certain age, will they be afraid of the years?"
Favorite answer:
There must be a gap in life, and there must be fun.
We all know the story of "China's last aristocratic lady-Nian Cheng, a famous lady of the Republic of China".
She manages everything in her life with a calm and safe mind.
Even if all kinds of misfortunes come to her face, she always sticks to her deep love and makes her life rich and interesting.
In the turbulent years, although imprisoned, she never made ends meet:
A little interest in life made her taste the sweetness in a cramped life.
She appreciates life and insists on her own mentality, which still affects us today.
As Wang Xiaobo said: "Pay attention to interest, probably to let us live the most dull life."
Women's interest has nothing to do with wealth and age, but with mentality.
A woman who knows how to live, even if her life encounters a short setback, she will always be on top and live an elegant and peaceful life every day.
Writer Zhao Nanzhu once said:
What you look like in the end depends on what you are.
A woman with real connotation, like a classic, is still charming after years.
Even though their youth is fleeting, they are firm in heart and have achieved a more elegant self;
Even though time will get old, they are sober and wise, and they still love fireworks.
Such a woman will not be defeated by years, but will only be perfected by years, and the more she lives, the more abundant she will be.
"Women are not born, but finished."
Take the initiative to grow up, cultivate these six qualities well, and make time friends from now on, be more calm and less flustered.