Yes, no one can live in a vacuum, so it is not only undesirable but also unrealistic to leave life completely in "silent mode".
Therefore, we must learn to try to turn down the volume of life and actively shield some noisy intrusions.
Smart people know that turning down the volume of life is to improve the quality and value of life.
Refuse useless socializing.
There is a question and answer on the Internet:
The well-received answer is:
I have a friend, a psychological counselor, named Xiao Guan.
He is very busy every day, having consultations in the morning and afternoon, and sometimes attending various trainings on weekends.
Because of his special status as a counselor, he contacts many people and is often dragged to some parties.
At first, he was very happy and thought it would expand his contacts and help consulting business.
But slowly, he found that his idea was wrong. At the dinner table, most people are persuading each other to drink.
Some people still misunderstand his psychological counseling, thinking that it is only the ideological work of making suggestions and being a serious person, and asking him to explain it over and over again, wasting his breath.
What bothers him even more is that he has been drawn into various WeChat groups by various WeChat friends since then, including more than 30 classmates, social welfare organizations, male consultants and parents.
As soon as the mobile phone is turned on, the information in each group is overwhelming, but he can only turn off the message prompt.
Later, he realized that joining so many clubs and helping others was sometimes a waste of his study time.
The insincerity on the wine table, pushing a cup for a change, has its own purpose, and may not be true friendship.
So he made up his mind to quit more than a dozen groups that didn't need to work.
Since then, his life has suddenly dropped a lot, his heart has become quieter, and he has more time and energy to devote to psychological counseling.
Small clearance regrets ground say:
The experience of this netizen reminds me of a passage that writer Lian Yue said:
A foothold in society ultimately depends on strength. Without strength, your so-called connections are a joke.
Really smart people don't invite too many people into their lives, and they don't spend time maintaining meaningless relationships because of face and worldly wisdom.
Cancel some so-called sense of ritual
There is a popular saying that life needs a sense of ceremony.
There's nothing wrong with that. The necessary sense of ceremony can alleviate the common emotional consumption and increase the interest of life.
The mistake is that some people misunderstand this statement and perform ceremonies for the sake of ceremonies.
Too much sense of ceremony makes their life too loud, and it is inevitable that they will be upset and lose the original meaning of the ceremony over time.
In life, we often find the following scenes.
The truth is often that after sending a circle of friends, his time is not necessarily spent reading books, listening to children's songs for a while, or playing games for a while;
Others, however, can't insist on exercising because of the impulse to apply for a fitness card, as if they were specifically for "taking pictures and punching in".
After entering the gym, if you don't do anything else, first take a selfie with sports equipment or use the treadmill, then retouch the picture for 20 minutes, be intoxicated for 20 minutes, consider the words, then send a circle of friends, and then slowly start warming up.
Although I punch in the gym every day, my figure hasn't changed much.
After a long time, people in the circle of friends will know why at first glance.
Writer Chen Dali said:
It is understandable to satisfy a little vanity in the sense of ceremony, but we can't reverse the priorities of life in order to pursue the sense of ceremony.
Excessive pursuit of ritual sense and neglect of the meaning of things themselves will eventually become a puppet of ritual sense.
I quite agree with such a view:
Anything that deserves a sense of ceremony focuses on things, not rituals. The sense of ceremony is just icing on the cake, not the whole life.
Really smart people know how to turn down the volume of life, get rid of some useless sense of ceremony, select the essence from the rough, leaving only a little special significance.
curb one's desire
I said to:
Bai once had the experience of "too greedy mouth and too miscellaneous eyes".
In a speech, looking back, he regrets ground say:
But at this time, he began to be confused and didn't know what he really wanted to do and what to throw away.
That year, he made a very important subtraction, stopped all the programs, quit his job as a producer of three columns, and did not appear for a year.
At that time, someone advised him that as long as you don't appear in the TV series for one month and six months, you won't be remembered.
But white thought:
Before that, Bai thought he could do sports, entertainment and so on, but during the whole year when he stopped broadcasting the program, he thought clearly that what he really should do was news, and he should dig deep into the news.
So Bai began to develop new program forms. A year later, the audience saw Lao Bai, who created classic news programs such as News 1+ 1, Time and Space Connection and Press Room.
Liang once said:
Anyone who is really smart knows that subtracting desire is adding happiness.
Just like white, if a person knows what he really wants, he can turn down the volume of his life and live freely. Only by traveling light can we walk faster and more steadily.
There is a "28 law" in psychology:
In any group of things, the most important thing only accounts for a small part, about 20%, and the remaining 80% is secondary, although it is the majority, so it is called the 28 th Law.
The important things in our life account for 20%, and the unimportant things account for 80%. We should learn to spend 80% of our energy and time on 20% of things instead of 80% of our time and energy on 80% of things.
Only by reducing unnecessary desires and obsessions and leaving a quiet place for yourself can we see the scenery of life clearly and gain real spiritual freedom.
Precipitate yourself with time
As the old saying goes, "an impetuous heart is a thief of virtue."
Impetuousness is the biggest obstacle to cultivating moral character and affects happiness.
Just like water is clear, not because it contains no impurities, but because it knows how to precipitate itself;
If people want to live calmly, they also need to precipitate themselves in time.
It is not silence, self-isolation and loneliness that precipitates oneself.
Those who know how to precipitate themselves in time must know how to turn down the volume of life.
People who precipitate themselves are good at "self-seeking", can find what they really need, know how to stop losses in time, and get out of ineffective social interaction.
People who precipitate themselves don't have much "desire to perform". They will calm down to enrich themselves, not deliberately show their diligence, and not show others some meaningless sense of ceremony.
People who precipitate themselves have strong self-control, know how to control their desires, delete the complexity of life, empty their inner space, and spend their time on things that they are better at and worth doing.
People who precipitate themselves understand that life is their own and has little to do with the outside world.
Liang Shiqiu said:
While paying time and effort, you should also keep a certain distance from the noise of the outside world, and don't try your best to make yourself impetuous, depressed and tired.
Learn to turn down the volume of life and use time to precipitate ourselves, so that we can become the best ourselves and live a full life.
* * * Encourage.