Most human suffering comes from unreasonable expectations.

Most of the pain in life comes from unreasonable expectations, and its root is the anxiety caused by death. The solution is that you should find your mission in life as soon as possible and fight for it all your life.

Have you ever had such a painful experience: going to the gym and seeing that the men and women exercising there are in good shape, you are envious and want to have a good figure. So, I got a membership card and went to the gym two or three times. As a result, my body didn't get better, let alone my body got better, even my weight didn't change. So I began to complain and struggle: I have been exercising so hard, why hasn't my body gotten better? Every day when I think about fitness, I get stuck in a state of irritability and chagrin.

Things themselves don't make us miserable, what makes us miserable is our negative emotions about things. And where do negative emotions come from? This involves the definition of emotion. What is emotion? It is the physiological reaction and psychological evaluation when people's expectations for the development of things reach or deviate. If things go according to their expectations, people will have positive emotions. On the other hand, if things go against their expectations, people will have negative emotions.

At the beginning of the article, I fell into a state of irritability and trouble because of fitness, because things deviated from my expectations. My expectation is that I can have a good figure after two or three exercises, but the actual situation is that nothing will change after two or three exercises. The actual situation seriously deviated from my expectations, so I had negative emotions of complaining, irritability and chagrin.

So what should we do? Very simple, adjust your expectations and make yourself more in line with the development of things.

Take fitness as an example. In fact, if you subtract 1 kg of meat, you need to export 3500 calories more under the condition that the existing input remains unchanged. If you want to lose weight 10 kg, you have to output 35,000 calories more.

What is this concept? Freestyle for 40 minutes, or running 1 hour, consumes about 500 calories. That is, you have to swim 1 month for half an hour, or run for 2 hours to consume 1000 calories. If you want to consume 35,000 calories, you need to freestyle for more than 50 hours, or run for more than 70 hours. This is by no means something that can be achieved by going to the gym two or three times.

Therefore, the correct expectation is to swim 1 hour every day, or run fast for 2 hours, and lose 10 kg in 50 days. And when you have correct expectations, you won't have negative emotions and fall into pain because of unreasonable expectations. This is why we have always advocated the principle of seeking truth from facts. Seeking truth from facts is to face the reality and make your expectations more in line with the law of the development of things.

If you look carefully, you will find that people's unreasonable expectations have a characteristic, that is, they are eager to achieve success, get quick success and strive for once and for all. Why is this? Because we knew we were going to die.

Animals don't know that they will die in the future, so they can live in the present, eat and drink, and they will be very happy. But not humans. Since human beings realized that they would die, death hung over their heads like a sword, and they didn't know when it would fall. Therefore, people hope to get more things in the shortest time, which leads to unreasonable expectations that people are eager for success and quick success.

So what should we do? You need to concentrate. What do you mean? Do you have the feeling that when you go to the shopping center, you don't know what to buy, so you look around, and wherever there are bargains, you will gather together. As a result, I spent half a day unconsciously, but I didn't buy what I wanted. I bought what others wanted you to buy.

But if you know exactly what you want, you won't be attracted by those discounted things at all, because they are not what you want. You will go directly to the container that sells that thing, get the thing, check out and leave. The whole process may take less than 10 minutes.

Is this our life? When we don't know what we want, we will be confused by all kinds of things. Our most precious time and energy are spent on things that have no practical value to us, such as short videos, film and television dramas, games, hot searches and celebrity gossip. ...

When we know what we want in this life, we will not be confused by those messy things, but concentrate our time and energy on what we want. You are more likely to succeed when you focus on only one thing in your life.

Some people say, why must people succeed? Success is not only to make yourself live a more comfortable life, but more importantly, success can alleviate people's anxiety about death. If death is inevitable, people hope that when they die, they will leave something with their own mark on the world. As "How Steel was Tempered" wrote: A man's life should be spent like this: when he looks back on the past, he will not regret wasting his time, nor will he be ashamed of being mediocre. And success proves that you have not wasted your time and that you have accomplished nothing.

So how can we focus? Find a mission that you are willing to work hard for all your life. When you find this mission, nothing else matters, and you can naturally concentrate. And those who are successful, they all found their mission very early and made all the efforts for it.